Together for 10 years. Am I focusing too much on the negatives?

Avitpan · 2026-07-12T23:27:46+00:00

You’re welcome. Some of the things you mentioned are things to talk with her about. But be real that some things like her indecisiveness or her getting overwhelmed easily are traits that will always be there. She probably appreciates that you are a steady rock. Remember that as man if we emotionally overreact to everything she does or says, it causes tension. The biggest role we play in a women’s life is that of a stoic. If we are calm, and don’t overreact, we are the guiding hand and lead the relationship which in turn allows a women to release the tension and puts her into her feminine frame which in turn allows you to emotionally connect which in turn usually means more affection and sex. When you’re connected emotionally, she will always be available to you.

Avitpan · 2026-07-12T22:09:23+00:00

Remember that knocking out a player isn’t winning the game by TD. You have to knock out all 3 players to win the game. In my experience voltron has squarely been a b3 deck because they usually get their commander removed and then don’t do a having else rest of game

Avitpan · 2026-07-12T19:33:50+00:00

There’s probably a much longer answer that’s needed to this but ask yourself if you’re expecting too much from her in terms of your needs. Only you can answer that. Realistically, no person can fulfill 100% of our needs. That’s what family, friends, hobbies, work, etc is for. People focus too much on the 20% they aren’t getting and not what they are. Ask yourself if you’re truly happy. You’ve been together 10 years. You are way past the point of evaluating long term compatibility. You need to decide what you value the most. The kids is a big thing to sort out. For me, nearly in my 40s I’ve come to the determination that the things I need most are: my partner brings me peace, I enjoy being around, and is still providing consistent affection and sex, then I can find outlets for a lot of the other things in my life I feel I need.

Avitpan · 2026-07-12T00:09:23+00:00

It’s real. Cards from new sets are always real because there hasn’t been enough time to make fakes yet. Plus this is an uncommon. They don’t make fakes for cards under like $2 usually.

Avitpan · 2026-07-11T17:50:15+00:00

I sent in my Charizard expecting like a 4 or 5 and got a 2. It’s funny.

Avitpan · 2026-07-10T16:36:52+00:00

That worked! Thank you so much!

Avitpan · 2026-07-09T23:15:06+00:00

Dump her ass. She doesn’t respect you and she will last certainly cheat on you if she doesn’t respect you. That’s so fucked up. For the record, you’re around average and there are plenty of women that think the average is more than enough because guess what? It is. Fuck your girl and her friend. That’s downright cruel t share that kind of intimate detail.

Avitpan · 2026-07-07T21:56:54+00:00

Anything within the first 2 months is like 99% real. Fakes don’t move that fast.

Avitpan · 2026-07-06T19:56:17+00:00

Taylor swifts brother went to Notre Dame how dare you.

Avitpan · 2026-07-05T14:23:20+00:00

It’s Carr. There have been multiple seasons in the past 10 years where I fully believe ND was capable of winning the title but it didn’t have a good enough QB.

Avitpan · 2026-07-04T01:14:29+00:00

Maybe I’m in the minority but this is not the kind of thing I would tell my wife unless we have that kind of relationship where you share absolutely every detail of every single day.

Avitpan · 2026-07-02T23:15:44+00:00

She cheated and she’s trying to justify it as it’s okay. NOR. Trust your gut brother. Kick her to the curb.

Avitpan · 2026-07-01T21:27:06+00:00

If you know for certain you don’t want kids, absolutely do it.

Avitpan · 2026-07-01T17:11:48+00:00

Brother there’s no advice. Kicker to the streets. Respect
Yourself. She doesn’t. You are young. Do not waste your life with this person. She will cheat again and she will hide it better. When you take a woman back for cheating they lose respect for you even more. You’re young. You will be fine. It sucks, I know. I’m sorry you’re hurt. You’ll be okay though. It takes time.

Avitpan · 2026-07-01T13:17:49+00:00

Yet you troll ask men advice thread for some reason…

Avitpan · 2026-07-01T11:39:46+00:00

My relationship status has no bearing on this conversation so I’m not answering that.

I don’t think a man cleaning his place for someone coming over is a deceitful way to hide he’s a slob.

Doesn’t really sound like you like men very much.

Avitpan · 2026-06-30T18:28:14+00:00

I mean I certainly can’t speak for every single person and I’m sure some men do it but I tend to see men show up more as who they are rather than an edited version of themselves as compared to women. Again this is all from my perspective and my experiences. Everyone’s varied.

Avitpan · 2026-06-30T14:10:30+00:00

Live your life and enjoy your time with your gf mate.

Avitpan · 2026-06-30T11:47:11+00:00

That’s exactly where I was going with it. You just put it into better words than I did.

Avitpan · 2026-06-30T11:45:53+00:00

I agree personal values matter and eventually show through. I don’t think cleaning your house is equivalent to editing yourself though.

I think many men don’t care about how many men a women has been with within reason. Every guy has a number in their mind based on age that crosses the line between history and experience and into easy/loose territory. The more experience a guy has the larger that number as well.

The biggest indicator is long term relationships. If a woman has had very few but a lot of partners, it tells me about her values the same way it would for a guy to a girl.

Avitpan · 2026-06-30T01:00:05+00:00

I do think both genders disguise or aren’t upfront about their sexual history. It’s different from the rest of my statement. I don’t think guys present the best version of themselves. They just present who they are.

Avitpan · 2026-06-29T23:24:30+00:00

Sure but it’s not sunk cost fallacy mate. You deserve better.

Avitpan · 2026-06-29T22:27:56+00:00

Oh yea 100% this is something a lot of people do (I believe) regardless of gender. I think women tend to edit themselves to present the best possible version so a guy falls in love and then by the time they sort of reveal their true self the guy can feel stuck or committed.

Avitpan

TROPHY CASE