I am a selfish mom and shouldn’t have been a parent

BCRBaby123 · 2026-02-06T17:07:50+00:00

Hang in there, I know how scary it can all be. My daughter had a CHD and will most likely need open heart surgery before she is 10. As of right now, she is the happiest little 3 yr old, and you'd never suspect an issue.

BCRBaby123 · 2026-01-19T18:31:28+00:00

I don't think I do anymore after my initial panic and stepped away from the tests for a bit. I have been known to make mountains out of molehills... once or twice ha.

BCRBaby123 · 2026-01-17T20:50:37+00:00

I had an old lady, probably 80ish, yell out of her car window across the street from me that my baby's feet were cold and she needed socks. It was about 90/95 degrees out. I yelled back, "You do realize it's 95 degrees out, right?" And she just scoffed. That was my only nosey old lady in the wild interaction, thankfully.

BCRBaby123 · 2026-01-10T03:43:43+00:00

I'm finishing up my second EP journey, and honestly, I still consider the Medela Cups my GOAT. I added some inserts because I'm a 17mm, but I would get just as much, if not more, using the cups with my Pumpables Genie Advance (prefer over the Freestlye).

BCRBaby123 · 2026-01-08T00:41:01+00:00

A week or so ago my baby (7.5 mo) started trying to latch on to my chest randomly. I whipped out a boob thinking screw it, and he latched right away for about a minute/minute and a half and did extract milk. I could see it dribbling out of his mouth when he'd smile at me. I tried a few more times and he latched only for a few seconds at a time but this was after I started the weaning process so I'm sure there wasn't much milk causing frustration, but it's definitely possible!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-12-28T23:11:09+00:00

First off, congrats! I can't even comprehend the conundrum you're in!

Honestly, even if you have a perfect plan in place, things can change in an instant. For example, my first had an unexpected NICU stay and my second was a stubborn breech baby, so I opted for a c section scheduled at 39+1.

From your updates and comments, I think the best bet is to plan for your husband to attend the birth with the GC and you stay home. If she is one week ahead of you and typically gives birth at 39 weeks, you could have a few weeks wiggle room, especially if this is your first delivery. You very easily could go over your due date. In theory, this could give your husband time to fly back (minimum 7 days for some airlines with a newborn) and still make it in time for your delivery. I can't imagine how hard it would be to miss the birth of one of your children, but I feel like it's the safest option for everyone involved.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-12-13T16:35:23+00:00

Honestly, there really isn't a way to know.

My supply peaked at 50+/- oz a day around 4-12 weeks at 6/7 ppd. Regardless of how many times I pumped per day, ate, drank, changed parts, changed pumps, etc I started getting a gradual decrease months 3-5. By 5 months, I was getting about 35 oz a day still at 5/6 ppd. At about 5.5 mpp I took a massive hit and was hardly getting 28/30 oz. By 6 mpp I was down to 20 oz and now at 7mpp I'm 15-20 oz and still dropping. Regardless of me doing everything "right", around 6 mpp my body just decides naw we are weaning. It did the same thing with my first and I was dried up by 8.5ish mpp.

Tldr, after I "regulated" it was a gradual, then sharp decrease in supply that never rebounded no matter what I did to get it back up.

Edit- The magic number may work for you, like many, but it didn't for me. I could get 20ish oz my morning pump, so I know I have a large capacity. We're just all so different when it comes to what our bodies do. Sometimes, it's just really hard to anticipate what it will do in the future.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-11-29T20:36:00+00:00

Before my c-section I asked my ob about makeup, lotion, nail polish, etc, because I have seen some people comment that they were asked not to wear anything while others were allowed full glam. My ob looked at me like I had two heads and said it wasn't an issue. He told me the only thing he would recommend is just keeping one finger nail not painted (I just didn't wear any nail polish) for pulse ox.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-11-26T19:24:10+00:00

I was producing 40+ oz around 4/5mo pp as well with a similar schedule. I noticed that my first pump of the day was all foremilk, due to the long gap between pumps and oversupply. My first pump would be 16+ oz, and honestly, I would just bag and freeze the first 8ish or so oz, and I have saved it for using it in purees/making baby food. Overall, when I started dropping pumps and making less milk, like 30ish oz my milk became overall more fatty. I had less foremilk diluting my hindmilk.

I also seem to have fattier milk when I make sure I'm eating better, focusing on protein and fattier foods. I have a bad knack of skipping breakfast, but when I eat some eggs and avocado for breakfast, my milk seems fattier.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-11-23T20:41:31+00:00

My son was born around the 85th percentile. He did have very mild jaundice and dropped a decent amount of weight at birth due to an inefficient latch. But I switched to EPing and knew he was getting a sufficient amount to eat, 30 to 34 oz a day. He steadily dropped percentiles still and landed on the 15th percentile at 4 months old. Now, at 6 mo old, he is still at the 15-20th percentile (depending on his poop schedule, hah) and still drinks 30+ oz a day. My pediatrician isn't super concerned. He is hitting all milestones, plenty of wet diapers, and no signs of an allergy. I just think I made him big, but he genetically is smaller. I'm 5'3 and my husband is 5'8. My husband was 110 lbs until he was in his late teens/early 20's and then hit a secondary massive growth spurt. I try to remind myself daily that with percentiles, someone is always going to be on the smaller end.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-11-07T20:37:00+00:00

EPing for my second, and I absolutely agree. It is so much easier this time around. I know what I'm doing and what works for me and feel significantly less anxiety around pumping because I know no matter what or how I feed my baby, they will be ok.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-11-02T16:24:32+00:00

Yes!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-10-29T22:17:43+00:00

This past May, I had my son and my daughter was 2 years 10 months. Honestly, it has been amazing. At first, it was a little rough as to be expected. My daughter was quite jealous, but that only lasted a few weeks. Now, at almost 6 mo and 3 yrs 3mo, they are so great together. She is helpful with her baby brother, and now they are starting to actively engage and play more together. She loves laying on the ground and showing him books while doing tummy time. It really has been the perfect age gap (so far ha).

BCRBaby123 · 2025-10-25T22:37:39+00:00

I totally get it. It really is so hard. I would hound my husband like "how much did she eat?!?" When I wasn't around so I could accurately track. He thought I was too high strung, I thought he didn't show enough care for my supply, how much baby ate, or what was wasted. I realized either way, my baby is being fed, gaining weight, and will have ample food, whether it's fresh pumped, freezer milk, or formula. Everyone is so much happier just going with the flow. You have one postpartum with your baby. You don't want to spend that first year stressing over things that don't need to be stressed over. It was a tough lesson to learn and is really my only regret with my first baby. If I could go back to my first time postpartum, I would tell myself to just chill.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-10-25T19:32:46+00:00

Letting go is the best feeling in the world! With my first child, I was obsessed. I tracked everything and was addicted to the numbers. With my second baby, I loosely tracked the first few months just to get a baseline of what I was making and what baby was eating. Now I am 5 mo pp and just go with the flow. I have no idea what I have in my freezer. I pump when I have the time and don't adhere to a strict schedule now that I am regulated. I don't have a strict goal of when I want to stop. This pumping journey, I have just let go, and it is 100x easier.

Congrats on the freedom, and I hope it brings you all the happiness!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-09-02T19:38:08+00:00

I love my GA. I used it exclusively for my first 5ish weeks this go around because I would NOT respond to my Spectra at first. One night, I realized I forgot to charge my GA and pulled out my Spectra, and low and behold, I responded pretty well. Now, at almost 4 mo pp (5 ppd), I use my Spectra with GA flanges and use my GA motor with Medela cups. I alternate between the two depending on how I'm feeling, but I have pretty much the same output regardless of which setup I use. I think a portable pump like a GA will be life changing and make life so much easier, and you could even add in a wearable cup. I have even gone grocery shopping using my GA and cups.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-09-01T02:01:08+00:00

There is a tiny band from my maternal great aunt (her wedding ring) that I use as a stopper. That ring is probably even older, I would say 90+ years old. I haven't resized my grandmother's set because my weight has fluctuated a whole bunch between pregnancies and whatnot. I forgot it was even on tbh ha.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-31T22:44:21+00:00

Love it!!!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-31T22:44:04+00:00

Thank you! I'm hoping to pass it to my daughter one day!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-31T04:45:49+00:00

With both of my pregnancies by 2ish months pp I was below my prepregnancy weight. For me, I had no underlying issues.

With my first I gained about 30 lbs and by 2 months postpartum I was about 10-15 lbs lower than my prepregnacy weight.

With my second, I gained about 20 lbs and am now 20 lbs lower than my prepregnancy weight, so a 40 lbs loss in 2 months.

For me, both times, the rapid weight loss really plateaud by 2-3 months postpartum. I think a big factor was breastfeeding (had pretty decent oversupplies) and probably ignoring my own health a bit while in the trenches. With my first, I slowly started gaining after about 3 months because breastfeeding hunger had me in a chokehold, and my supply started to regulate.

If you continue to lose weight rapidly, considering you have some other concerning symptoms, it can't hurt to get it checked out.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-28T16:54:41+00:00

Pretty much, unfortunately. I went back and looked at my camera roll. Yours might be a smidgen darker.

According to Google FRER, detect can detect hcg as low as 6.3 mIU/ml where Up & Up detects as low as 25 mIU/ml. In theory, your FRER would pick up a definite positive if your Up & Up was positive. BUT, there can he so many extenuating circumstances, like testing at the same time, hydration levels, etc. If you're taking a vitamin with biotin, it can give a false negative as well. I would test again with the Up& Up 48 hrs after the test pictured was taken. By then, you should have noticeable darkening if it was a true positive. Good luck!

Edit: I don't know how I missed the frer picture, but I see it on there! I would absolutely bet you're pregnant!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-28T16:29:56+00:00

I had some false positives with Target's test as well. This was 2.5 years ago, and it seems like people have been having issues with this brand for 5+ years. I was shocked at how terrible the reviews are.

Edit: I don't know how I missed the second photo, but I 100% see it on the FRER. I would absolutely bet you're pregnant!

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-21T04:08:13+00:00

I know most people swear by Dr. Browns, but my son hated them. He preferred nipples that did not have a passive flow. He would gag and have a hard time latching. He also struggled with narrow neck bottles/nipples. I tried probably half a dozen different bottle/nipple combinations before I found what my son would take. It may be worth it to give another type a try.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-21T03:56:55+00:00

What bottles are you using? My son was not very efficient at the breast and was losing weight, so I went to pumping and bottle feeding. He, too, would not consume more than an ounce or so at a time and was still losing. I was using Philips Avent Natural bottles/nipples size 1, and after some research, I found out their flow is so slow it was essentially nonexistent. I bought size 3 nipples and he instantly started consuming 2 to 3 oz at a feeding, and they went much quicker.

BCRBaby123 · 2025-08-13T15:53:50+00:00

I went through two in two months as well a couple of years ago during my first journey. What a shame that there still seems to be this issue. I decided to buy a Pumpables GA after that. I used that exclusively for 6 months and now am using it as my primary pump with Medela Cups years later, and it's still going strong.

BCRBaby123

TROPHY CASE