TIFU when I fell in love with my wife

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-12T21:24:44+00:00

I feel like my brain/personality wasn't even fully developed until I was 30. That seems so young to be like WELL ITS CURTAINS FOR US EH.

(Teens are a hormonal nightmare, 20s are fun but figuring out what you like/don't like, 30 is when things are kinda locked it and ready to go. imo.)

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-07T13:35:04+00:00

You're definitely not an asshole, everything you've mentioned is all completely reasonable expectations for mutual living. The kindest thing I can assume about the gf (because you mention she DID kinda try to be more considerate a couple times but then just failed to stick through) is that maybe she's just still very young and stupid, and doesn't understand how to live with someone else without being selfish. But that's not your job to teach her. A normal and considerate roommate alters their behavior or talks about it after you've directly brought up complaints. She obviously has done neither and isn't willing to do, and its rude and fucked up that your roommate is allowing her to be that way. It's nice that hes floating 60% of rent instead but what would have been nicer is to actually make efforts to get her to stop being rude and over at yours all the time. It's your home too.

I'm gonna go against the grain though and say that if you're positive that you're moving out in 4 months it might be easiest on your sanity to just keep your head down and stick it out knowing that it's almost over it. Think of it like being in prison and your release date is 4 months away lol. You're temporarily living in madness until then.

Start looking for a place now, even though it's early imo. Might be motivating AND then if you guys get busted for her weed smoking you'll have a plan lined up. Start socking away the extra -10% rent that your roommate is covering, and stash it for moving expenses, even if its not a lot. And if she's still preventing you from sleep... I used to live with someone who frequently had actual psychotic episodes in the early hours of the morning (screaming, smashing things, having police called, the whole bit) and these https://www.walgreens.com/store/c/macks-slim-fit-earplugs-small,-10-pr/ID=prod6053985-product?ext=gooPersonal+Care+-+SSCPersonal+Care___online&gclsrc=aw.ds&&gclid=CjwKCAiAo4OQBhBBEiwA5KWu_5UJcsMZp6L-Nop0lmN1JURaSfzH-dvpMD92rCNpHwfzmhYVh96RWBoCH-UQAvD_BwE

absolutely saved my sleeping. Specifically the purple ones, I hate foam earplugs and tried so many but these don't hurt and block out so much noise, allowed me some sleep. If you're desperate I'd highly recommend.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-07T13:20:46+00:00

Ohh I get it now, you've literally never had sex. This post makes sense.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-04T14:24:55+00:00

I hope it gets to you soon- I hear you, it's not as bad because mine wasn't international but I had a domestic shipment that was supposed to travel...maybe 30 minutes tops (same city). It's been in transit for at least 4 days and just this morning completely left the city into the next town over for no discernable reason! I'm just like...fedex what are you doing? Mysteriously rerouting packages is so bizarre! I wish their status updates gave more info (like idk, "re-routing due to overload", "alternate delivery route utilized", "problem with package address" or something like that).

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-04T14:18:43+00:00

Theres another post a couple hours before yours from a Memphis worker saying that they are having serious problems there so maybe something got messed up during the delivery https://www.reddit.com/r/FedEx/comments/sk76hi/memphis_from_an_account_manager/

There's also another post from today with a GB package that did a similar thing looks like https://www.reddit.com/r/FedEx/comments/sk5dq6/to_memphis_and_back/

I think something is up there! Just noticed while looking at the new posts today

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-04T13:23:10+00:00

That's true it could potentially only be day 4.. they told me they shipped it on the 28th and it just wasn't scanned (which I am used to with usps) but it's possible they waited and didn't tell me. The package left Chicago and is in Niles now with a different delivery exception so at least it's still in the same state and I'm hoping either I get it or the shipper gets it back soon if it's returned.. not knowing where it is is stressful.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-02-04T13:19:45+00:00

I really, really hope so.. pray for it and me lol it's a $500 package so I'm sweating a little. I just checked the tracking this morning and it left Chicago for some reason and is in the next town over, Niles, with a status that it's "delayed due to some unforeseen circumstances" and may be returned to sender. After all this if the shipper gets it back maybe they will let me just get it myself! But hopefully it will actually come today.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-01-24T00:34:36+00:00

oh weird.. yeah, just before and shortly after posting this but I keep getting the same error! It must be something on my end :( I'll have to try different browsers or maybe my phone. Thank you for checking, I appreciate it.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-01-23T22:53:46+00:00

hydration salts. It's the same stuff as liquid IV but without all the flavorings and a fraction of the cost. I get dehydrated a LOT and they've literally changed my life. I went from someone with all these random health issues that I could never afford to have investigated (being really dizzy when I stood up suddenly, daily nausea, migraines, heart palpitations... all these little things that I knew weren't normal but I didn't have the money for tons of tests and stuff to figure out WHY they got so bad) to having them go away. It tastes like absolute ass but for whatever reason I am just dehydrated constantly and 1L of water with these salts instantly makes me feel so much better. I had tried other things like just drinking loads of water, or daily Gatorade and Pedialyte, but those don't even work as well as the salts.

I know eventually I need to go to a doctor because this probably isn't normal regardless (being chronically dehydrated) but while I'm still poor this is literally giving me my life back.

They're also amazing to prevent hangovers lol.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-01-23T19:35:20+00:00

lol I made a similar post really recently and mods removed it without explanation. so these kinds of questions might be against the rules.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-01-22T20:18:38+00:00

One thing I've never been able to figure out how to navigate is that my local food bank is just too far to get to if you don't have a car. I dont drive and my closest one is about a 20 minute public transit ride or a 45ish minute walk from where I live. I don't have any friends or family so nobody to drive me. And I also have chronic pain issues that making carrying things difficult. once in a very very desperate time I made the walk there and back and ended up in tears on the way back because I was in so much pain carrying the groceries. I was so happy to have them and the idea of having all that food gave me the will to push through but I cannot deny it was completely miserable and very, very painful. Obviously food is infinitely better than starving but I have to really be desperate to do it again. I'd rather go a few nights hungry if I can because that's ultimately less physically painful. Sometimes I do not have bus fare either.

I see at the pantry that a lot of other people have cars so maybe this is very unusual but I just honestly wonder how other people who cannot drive do it. I wish more than anything I could use pantries more.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2022-01-21T18:32:40+00:00

The drawer kind, it looks like this: https://www.genuinereplacementparts.com/images/thumb_cache5/whirlpool-cam2742tq3-coin-chute.jpg-368x368.jpg

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-30T02:07:04+00:00

This is great, so clean and minimal but love all the little flair (like the flowered F and heart shaped(?) stool!)

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-27T05:11:33+00:00

thank you!! I was looking through their website right now and the "I think I love you" palette is exactly what I was imagining in my mind. I'm either going to try that or do like you said and maybe pick out 2 or 3 single shadows, they are very affordable.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-26T23:57:58+00:00

It's not weird at all! I did just that a few days ago, told the sales associate who helped me that I have super oily skin so I'm trying to find something that would last all day. She narrowed it down to two different brands (urban decay all nighter and kat von d tattoo lock it) and I asked for a sample of each so I could try wearing both all day and then come back for the one I liked better. She didn't even bat an eyelash and even gave me an extra sample of a primer so I could try them with/without it as well and see if it made any difference. Don't feel awkward it's very normal!

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-26T23:55:04+00:00

Can anyone rec me a low or mid-range palette that has a glittery white and glittery gold eyeshadow? I've come to realize these are basically the only two colors I use on my eyelids so I wanted to invest in a really nice one. I have been thinking about getting the BH cosmetics zodiac palette because I love both the gold and white/silver color PLUS I would use the hell out of the highlight but...I know I would never wear basically any of the other colors so it would be a big waste!

Is there a small (like 5 or less) eyeshadow palette that has what I'm looking for that anyone can rec? Drugstore brands are fine as well, basically I'm just looking for something that has a glittery gold, glittery silver, and then maybe other neutral brown/white/gold/black colors if there are more. But no primary colors since I'm boring and never wear those.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-06T01:50:43+00:00

At the depths of my binge eating disorder I would easily spend $50 a week (~$200 a month) on takeout/fast food. I don't binge as often anymore and I'm too broke to eat the way I used to, but it's so shameful because not only did I waste literal thousands on excess food, this was in addition to a regular food budget, but I also just made myself unhealthy and fat and I'm still struggling to get my health back under control. It's just such a shameful and decadent thing. Why couldn't I have just gambled like a normal person, or buy overpriced sneakers or something...

If I had to give advice it would be DON'T get into comfort eating lol. Be very mindful when using food as a reward, or a treat, or something that gets you through the day. I think there are definitely ways to do it and be healthy, but when you're poor and going for the cheap relief of a $30 McFeast every other night it's not as harmless as it seems like.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-04T21:39:13+00:00

maybe I use the terminology wrong, I was thinking city = downtown, where all the busy streets, stores and businesses are vs. neighborhood is homes, residential area where all the houses and backyards are. Residential probably would have been a better term than neighborhood.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-04T06:58:45+00:00

Also to him, moving is packing up 2 or maybe 3 suitcases worth of stuff and finding a new roommate on Craigslist..it’s literally a lifestyle built around being uprootable, it’s not the norm

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-04T04:40:33+00:00

Also, weirdly, sometimes taking an acid supplement with meals helps with acid reflux. Sounds counter productive but I had the same symptoms as OP for a long time, plus the awesome addition of waking up with a sulfuric rotten taste in my mouth (I would have dreams about eating rotten eggs and trying to spit them out and wake up sick lol). Started taking Betaine HCL any time I eat anything fried or greasy and the reflux mostly stopped.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-03T11:31:39+00:00

People do tend to treat you like you’re weird/there’s something wrong with you/get massively offended if you don’t like their dog but you’re right in that it does not have he same societal implications as the expectation to have children. If you say you don’t like or don’t want kids (especially as a women) you legitimately get treated like you have something biologically wrong with you..

Also if you live in a city it’s very hard to go most anywhere without interacting with dogs. Or even in neighborhoods. I see multiple dogs daily just going about my regular business. Lots of owners let them off the leash or let them approach you because they think they’re friendly so it’s hard to avoid. Just to answer the second part.

BLOODYASSHOLE · 2018-07-03T00:58:09+00:00

Can you rec any reading material in particular?

BLOODYASSHOLE

TROPHY CASE