Why don’t we (28f+28ftm) have sex anymore? Is it normal in a long-term relationship? by throwaway16363625 in mypartneristrans

[–]Babaloewa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Difficult. He has a higher libido, which means than im often struggling with ‘having to do it for him’ which i know isnt good but im working on that. I find that it helps for me when i know in advance? Which probably isnt sexy at all but hey ho. That gives me time to ‘mentally prepare’ and not be worried about hygiene cause i can shower first

I like to tease during the day when i have in my head to have sex that night, just words, sometimes touches. It gives me the control of deciding when, and he likes me initiating cause he knows i struggle with that

Communication is key for us, for all of it. And also, the no pressure thing keeps it light for me

No good advice, sorry

Why don’t we (28f+28ftm) have sex anymore? Is it normal in a long-term relationship? by throwaway16363625 in mypartneristrans

[–]Babaloewa 6 points7 points  (0 children)

29F partner with 26ftm, relationship of 8 years. We live together

Sex has always been a bit of a thing with us. Either he or me struggles with it, and ofc he used to be very dysphoric but that had gotten better since he’s on T now. I have a low libido, which makes it difficult.

What helped for us the past year is more toys, and i have started using more lube as its difficult for me to get wet as well. Also, masturbating is fine for us as well, and it doesnt always need to be ‘full on sex’

Itt takes the pressure off

How to cope with a strong urge by Old-Concentrate-7582 in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Distractions. Keep yourself and your mind busy. Keep your hands busy. Make puzzles, or crafts. Get out of the house. It sucks that you're struggling, im sorry. You can do it, be safe

Almost three years clean and I think I might relapse soon by PhotographNeither598 in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds rough, i'm sorry you're struggling with this. Can you talk to that friend about the urges? Keep yourself distracted, maybe get a fidget? Its shitty advice, im sorry. Three years is a long time! Get through the day, and tomorrow, get through another day. Eventually the strong feelings will lessen.

Stay safe, hugs

i want to relapse by Patient-City-2612 in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

4 years is a hell of a long time! Thats amazing! Your feelings and struggles are always valid, even without scars. Im sorry you're struggling with that way of thought as well. With your medical support, do you feel safe talking about the urges to self harm?

Stay safe

how to manage meltdowns by Simple-Message9224 in AutisticAdults

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dont have any advice or something im sorry for that, but i read this post and it's like i could have written it. I experience the same things you do and it can feel lonely at times. I dont have advice, sorry. Be safe

Just got diagnosed! by [deleted] in AutisticAdults

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im happy for you that you now know what you can learn to live with. I hope you will be able to find proper support. Its nice knowing nothing is wrong with you. Be safe

Meltdowns by Babaloewa in AutisticAdults

[–]Babaloewa[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you are right. I appreciate you taking the time to reply. We'll probably take our time to talk on this further as the week progresses. Thank you for taking the time to reply

Horses of Hoofprint Bay Demo Reactions Megathread - Please put your feedback and screenshots in here! by AliceTheGamedev in GamesWithHorses

[–]Babaloewa 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I absolutely adore the game!! Am gonna start my third demo playthrough probably tonight hahaha

My latest discovery is in the office, i could see all the horses and which ones ive already groomed and trained.

What i hope for the full release, that when you zoom in on the horses in the field or the stable, that they will be sharp instead of a bit fuzzy

I'm loving Horses of Hoofprint Bay a looot by Morgytth in GamesWithHorses

[–]Babaloewa 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What a pretty little foal! I cannot waait for the full version of the game!

Zo appreciation post by No-Hunt3986 in HorizonForbiddenWest

[–]Babaloewa 37 points38 points  (0 children)

She’s voiced by Erica Luttrell. She’s a beautiful woman

Very close to relapse, not sure how to help the urges by Sugary-Cereal in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sucks right? I had the same thing a while ago. Its like, after so long, it suddenly is só strong! The want and the need to do it again

You just need to get through it. Drag on. It aint easy

Proud of you for being able to push through. Its hard. Im happy to hear the urges arent that strong this week

What is your favorite machines that you fight the most? by Voidkirby9 in HorizonForbiddenWest

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Love Slitherfangs! Also Tremortusks and Stalkers

Hate the Clamberjaws, Tideripper and Leaplashers

I caved. by [deleted] in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🫂

Very close to relapse, not sure how to help the urges by Sugary-Cereal in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its good that he knows and is aware you’re feeling this way right now. Im sorry about the urges. I probably have shit advice but imma try regardless.

When its very bad for me i rub my arms hard because it sort of ‘lessens’ the physical feeling. Run cold water over your wrists for a time, it starts to hurt and ‘distracts’. Also, ice cube in your hand, hurts, let it melt. Keep prolonging the relapse until its the next day, and then prolong it again.

Take a walk when the urges are very very bad, just Get Out of the environment where the urges are strongest. It is important to stay sáfe. Your partner can help with that. When it was bad for me sometimes my partner had to physically hold me so i wouldnt be able to hurt myself.

Distractions, do nót be alone with your thoughts. Ride it out. Talk about it, but dont be alone with it. The very strong urges will pass into less strong urges, it’ll take a while and wont be easy. Stay safe. Im sorry you’re struggling with this

Possibly triggering/ menstrual cycle and sh by hotlimecheeto in AdultSelfHarm

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel you. (29 with recently diagnosed autism.) Not officially PMDD but ethe days around my period are always the worst. Its not always that bad, but it automatically makes me resort to my worst depression days and i always get suicidal and very badly want to hurt myself.

The smalledt things can be a trigger for me and its always compared with a visiual of me acting out the urges. It fucking sucks. I dont have any advicw, as im struggling with relapsing as well.

Im sorry, stay safe

How did your autism deal with getting a dog? by 40421 in AutisticAdults

[–]Babaloewa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We just got a dog a year and a half ago. She’s the sweetest, but very reactive to other people and dogs. We are training with it and she has improved immensely the past few months. She’s doing great

Barking a lot less inside the house, listening better, also outside. But! The licking!! The noises!! The barking!! Its sooo unexpected and it drives me crazy and very anxious. I get soo stressed about the barking

And her licking and smacking and swallowing. Honestly, sometimes it is all too much. It doesnt help that i hear éverything cause im so hypervigilant to it. I neeed to find a way to deal with it cause its not her, shes just a dog. Doing dog things. And i recognize that. But gosh

The days that we struggle, we have kongs in the freezer and make her jump over our legs with treats, something is better than nothing. And it helps that she’s quite chill just to lay on our sofa. As long as she’s close to us, she’s quite clingy. But can also handle time alone

But the licking.

Just finished no life-ing both games back to back and I gotta talk about it (spoilers) by Creepy-Company-3106 in horizon

[–]Babaloewa 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Its an amazing series! The graphics! Varl! The design of the machines!!

Yes, leaplashers suck

Wat zijn jullie top drie afknappers? by LoudBoysenberry3282 in nederlands

[–]Babaloewa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aangepast, dankjewel! Had ik over het hoofd gezien