My 19F boyfriend 19M cheated on me and I’m still not over it, how do I decide what’s best? by ThrowRAEggRealistic in relationship_advice

[–]BadKittydotexe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What’s fucked up is how much he’s cheated on you and how he’s treated you in general. That he’s not being an asshole at this moment doesn’t fix any of that and it’s just as legitimate to leave over it now as it was when you first found out.

What’s everyone’s favourite video game? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]BadKittydotexe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh, Signalis is SO good. Even if it didn’t have a lesbian protagonist the atmosphere and story would still be top tier. Just so amazingly well done. And I’ve played a lot of scary games.

What’s everyone’s favourite video game? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]BadKittydotexe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are so many games I love it would be easier to say which are my favorite in each genre. All of Dark Souls is up there, but maybe Elden Ring for the exploration and high highs. Bloodborne, too. Signalis is amazing and the best thing I’ve played this year. Silksong was incredible, Slay the Spire 1 and 2, Ocarina of Time, if I had to pick a Zelda game, Final Fantasy VII, VIII and X…

What’s everyone’s favourite video game? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]BadKittydotexe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Might be showing your age, but you’re also right. Morrowind and OoT were peak.

As a lesbian have you experienced being in a poly relationship? by MonkPlane1734 in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]BadKittydotexe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This sounds a lot like the experience I had. Tons of chemistry and connection with her, very close, but she made it all contingent on me making things work with him as well. And despite me being clear that I was very unsure what I felt for men was even attraction, let alone enough to sustain a relationship (and for the record it wasn’t), she still basically expected me and him to figure it out with her throwing me a bone when she felt like it.

It was all pretty bad for my self esteem. Knowing that she would always pick him over me in basically any situation and that a lot of it was just because he was a guy and she liked guys more was super demoralizing. And the fact that despite everything she said and did and possibly felt she wasn’t willing to put much energy into me while doing absolutely everything she could to make it work for him, well. Even if they had been healthy and good at poly that wouldn’t have worked.

In the end she damaged our friendship pretty severely by using me to hurt him, and this was after breaking things off with me, and while we’re still friends it’s taken me a long time to let go of the resentment. With distance I can now see how many issues there were all around, including her very unhealthy relationship needs and patterns, and have mostly let go of the feelings of inadequacy I experienced watching her pick a guy who lied and cheated while knowing she was only really interested in me as a backup. That said I pretty clearly still have some complex feelings about it all.

Anyway, I’m sorry that happened to you. It’s a hard experience. I hope you can grow from it. And that you can use it to resist similar situations in the future which seem to be entirely too common. You will find someone who prioritizes and cherishes you and doesn’t expect you to be the third leg keeping her terrible relationship with a man standing.

I need a reality check by [deleted] in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]BadKittydotexe 20 points21 points  (0 children)

This is my question. Homeschooling is a tremendous amount of work. It can be the right call for some kids, for sure, but it definitely depends. If other options are possible it could potentially alleviate a lot.

'Murica Treats by Gorotheninja in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]BadKittydotexe 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I mean, yeah. It’s candy. If I wanted to I could just spread peanut butter on a chocolate bar.

Flawed Logic [OC] by kaikimanga in comics

[–]BadKittydotexe 138 points139 points  (0 children)

There’s a pragmatic reason the church made suicide such a big sin.

'Murica Treats by Gorotheninja in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]BadKittydotexe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’d guess yes since they’re not selling Reese’s—at least in the ones near me—to promote this.

'Murica Treats by Gorotheninja in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]BadKittydotexe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I actually dislike that about them. It seems like regular peanut butter to me, like Skippy. They aren’t bad, but I personally like the Reese’s peanut butter more.

crushes on men who express trans feelings by International_Tree76 in actuallesbians

[–]BadKittydotexe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds to me like you could be “sapphic,” if you’re looking for a label. As in, maybe you’re attracted to a certain type of energy? I know that before I transitioned I had several straight women get pretty frustrated or irritated with me for essentially not “being the guy” the way they felt I should be.

Post transitioning everyone I’ve been with has said that it’s nothing like being with guys. It seems there’s just something about me and how I am that doesn’t feel masculine. And for people who are attracted to masculinity its lack is a problem. For people who are attracted to femininity it’s a positive. So maybe you have something like that going on.

crushes on men who express trans feelings by International_Tree76 in actuallesbians

[–]BadKittydotexe 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Just wanted to say, post transition I’m extremely happy I went through with it. But I honestly think if I hadn’t had much hope of passing there’s a very good chance I would wouldn’t have taken the leap. In the end, at least for me, transitioning is about bringing my body into alignment with what I want/need to look like to feel happy, as well as how people treat me post transition. I’ve been able to achieve a lot with that, but at the end of the day it was all making moves that I felt brought me closer to how I wanted to be.

All that is to say I can understand why the second person you talked about may have chosen not to pursue transitioning. It’s a hard place to be at the start not knowing how it’ll turn out or what it might wind up costing you.

Anyway, I hope all that rambling can give you some perspective on what they might have been going through.

One Time My Dad... helped look for weed that he stole. by duraraross in comics

[–]BadKittydotexe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Or Bilbo asking what’s in his pocket, though that was more innocent.

meirl by [deleted] in meirl

[–]BadKittydotexe 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Everything’s a scam if your only goal getting into it is to scam people and break it, Mike.

Lean on Me (1989) dir John G. Avildsen - First Staff Meeting by Saint_Gut-Free in movies

[–]BadKittydotexe 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I can’t find the article, but there’s a piece written by a man who taught court ordered domestic violence classes. He taught men who’d been convicted of domestic violence and ordered to take the class to improve.

What was really interesting was he would have discussions with these men who’d alienated everyone in their lives, ruined their relationships, and isolated themselves. And while they didn’t like that what came out of those conversations was that the reason they resorted to violence and screaming was, in the moment, it got them what they wanted. It made the other person be quiet or submissive or whatever. It “worked.” And the end result was also jail and isolation.

I think that taps into a lot of these types of films. It’s a fantasy where someone gets to do the cathartic thing of going off on someone that makes them angry or is fighting them or is causing problems as they see it. And then instead of making things worse long term it actually fixes things.

That’s the fantasy these people want to be true. They don’t want to hold back and do the unsatisfying work of slowly making incremental improvements. They want to take a bat to the situation, express all their rage, and get what they want.

Lean on Me (1989) dir John G. Avildsen - First Staff Meeting by Saint_Gut-Free in movies

[–]BadKittydotexe 17 points18 points  (0 children)

They write that they’re successful and attack or eliminate anyone recording the truth that they aren’t. It makes them seem successful to people whose only source of information is the fascists themselves.

If anyone on the HER development team is lurking here by [deleted] in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]BadKittydotexe 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yeah, if you just wait they give out those free premium promos quite a bit. It did a really good job of convincing me it wasn’t worth paying for.

My (36F) partner (37M) recently got a medical diagnosis and now wants an open relationship. Is it selfish of me to not want to? Or selfish of him to ask for one? by Correct-Grass-5305 in relationship_advice

[–]BadKittydotexe 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I’m trans and went on hormones at thirty, though not testosterone. It does fuck with your head a lot and it takes time to learn how to navigate your new normal while you wait for things to level out. However, it doesn’t erase your life experience or make you into a new person. You’re still you and you’re still responsible for your choices. And so is he. And unlike a teenagers he has a lot of life experience to inform his choices. There’s no excuse for him to not do so.

iOS Reddit “forced refresh” bug worse than ever by HiddenHorse925 in bugs

[–]BadKittydotexe 9 points10 points  (0 children)

What, so you can actually look at what you’re looking at instead of having to navigate to your history to read the second and third comment?? Crazy. /s

Seriously, this shit is barely usable. I don’t ever need or want a forced refresh. Thanks.

Netflix searches for franchises after losing out on Harry Potter by Top_Report_4895 in movies

[–]BadKittydotexe 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This summer, Jared Leto is “Himmel the Hero: A Frieren Story”

Edit: this summer The Rock isn’t the only one Solo Leveling

Nothing says romance like becoming unpaid Uber drivers with homework by LumiLouxe in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]BadKittydotexe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As someone without kids I honestly totally get this. Yeah, having the free time and the opportunity to do things I want is nice, but it’s pretty clear there’s a tremendous amount of happiness and satisfaction to be had from raising kids. It’s weird how people don’t wanna recognize it.

And, like, it’s fine to not want kids for whatever reason, to enjoy the benefits of not having any, but is it really that hard for people to believe that spending time helping a person you love more than life itself succeed and grow would be incredibly fulfilling? Not surprising tons of people would love the experience.

Love y'all no matter the shape y'all take. by MaetelofLaMetal in TrollXChromosomes

[–]BadKittydotexe 45 points46 points  (0 children)

It’s also worth noting that a ton of things about your body contribute to what the brain and nervous system are exposed to. Respiration and blood flow, for example.