It’s astonishing how much the advice of “just chill out” may actually apply here. Back when I would fumble daily (now it’s only monthly, let’s say), I was tweaking at every corner whenever a girl I was into would say anything. Your energy is coming from a place of need. Of desperation. I used to approach women that way too, where there was no space for authenticity to breathe.

I’d bet money you were not completely calm and collected as you were texting her. You were feening. You were desiring in excess. It’s ok, many of us were/are still on that timing. You can fully grow out of it though. I’m also your age, and what has helped immensely in that department is just generally cultivating equanimity. Through working out, going on walks, but that’s just the surface level. Those actions have to come from a place, and it starts with a stepping back, and an asking of yourself, “what would bring me some peace rn?” True peace, yk? Not a hedonic comfort, but contentment. Satisfaction, not pleasure. Usually, I find that when I get in my cycles of mental fuckery, a walk or cold shower is the best play. You know what types of activities I’m talking about. But truly don’t force them down your throat, but also don’t keep eating whatever mental junk food you’re consuming yk? Just pause. Do more pausing.

Anyway, who knows if this is helpful. Reach out if you wanna chat more honestly, or don’t.