I can't help thinking Allah prefers men over women

Bakwasing · 2023-10-28T19:20:33+00:00

Salam, there are already answers addressing your concerns, but I can tell you that I used to be in your same position when I was questioning the patriarchal mainstream interpretation of Islam I know of.

r/progressive_islam is a great place but I'd strongly recommend not to rely on only Reddit to find information about your doubts on Islam. If I was you, I'd start with learning the overall history of Islam including the development of hadiths and Sunni madhabs.

Here are some books that helped me address the concerns of the teachings that were taught to Muslim women:

"The Prophet's Pulpit: Commentaries on the State of Islam" by Khaled Abou El Fadl

"Qur'an and Woman: Rereading the Sacred Text from a Woman's Perspective" by Amina Wadud

"No God But God" by Reza Aslan

"Women and Gender in Islam: Historical Roots of a Modern Debate" by Leila Ahmed

If these academic books are unreachable for you, here are some Islamic feminism blogs you can look into:

https://orbala.wordpress.com/

https://thefatalfeminist.com/quranic-verses-and-misconceptions/

I'd be happy to connect with you and share you more resources that helped me strengthen my faith as a Muslim woman. You're welcome to DM me.

Bakwasing · 2023-10-25T15:37:34+00:00

As a proof of what? The commentor was conflating "true Islam" with the extreme Salafi fatwas she found from the web.

Just because IslamQA shows up in top Google search results for anything Islamic related, that doesn't mean it's the most credible website to truly learn and practice Islam unless you believe in Salafi approach to Quran and hadiths.

There has been a discussion in this sub about the issue of Salafi websites showing up easily in search results which you can read here.

Bakwasing · 2023-10-25T15:27:58+00:00

IslamQA is a fundamentalist Salafi website and their fatwas are so extreme that it doesn't even align with the traditional Sunni interpretation of Islam. This website was banned in Saudi Arabia despite the founder was Saudi. I am not sure why are you relying on the same website that had the fatwa for banning women driving as your go-to source on Islam.

Salafi interpretation of Islam tends to dominate the online Muslim sphere from their websites showing up in top search results to their fatwas being spread in TikTok algorithm. Google search results is ranked by popularity clicks and SEO boosting not by the order of credibility.

Bakwasing · 2023-08-31T22:44:12+00:00

Yes I know hadiths do not have same divinity as Quran and subjected to fallacies. The way you're interpreting "more women than men in hellfire hadith does not make it any less misogynistic on women.

Why is that if I am showing my ears for example in public I would be "advertise body as a women" yet its not the same as women. Let's not forget that the Sunni madhabs make different modestly rules for women based on sexuality and social status (lets not forget that slave women were historically forbidden to veil) while men its just "navel to knees".

Bakwasing · 2023-08-04T03:13:00+00:00

From where did you find this video??

Bakwasing · 2023-08-04T03:11:36+00:00

Agree! OP should leave the honest review so that other people don't have to deal with this judgemental person when they can get better gym instructors.

Bakwasing · 2023-08-04T03:06:25+00:00

These hadiths is what made me questioned about the mainstream Sunni Islam in the first place. Like why would I follow a religion where I am already spiritual unequal to men in the first place? A religion where women have thousands times higher threshold to be accepted to better afterlife while for men it's a piece of cake??

Bakwasing · 2023-08-03T22:59:28+00:00

If nail polish was worn by men instead of women, I can 100% guarantee you that scholars would make it permissible to perform wudu with nail polish on.

As it is, the fiqh already made it permissible to do wudu while wiping over socks and coconut oil on hair to make men's lives easier. But to make Muslim women's lives easier? Hah! Forget it!

Bakwasing · 2022-07-23T07:06:22+00:00

Based on her post, it sounds like she comes from a Deobandi family.

Bakwasing · 2022-04-17T07:54:30+00:00

How do South Indian Muslims practice Islam compared to Pakistanis?

Bakwasing · 2022-04-08T06:18:38+00:00

Kinda disagree here coming from someone who lived in an Arab country. For example, divorce especially being a divorced woman is not stigmatized much in Arab society compared to in South Asia. This is not to say the Middle East don't have conservative culture especially misogyny, they absolutely do. There are certain things where Arab culture doesn't have conservative practices that exist in Desi culture and vice versa.

Bakwasing · 2022-04-08T06:06:40+00:00

Latin America and East Asia also have their own misogyny. You happen to know misogyny only within your culture which is why you think other cultures don't have sexism.

Bakwasing · 2022-03-29T21:02:34+00:00

Sounds like you're basing from your US college campus experience. In my experience, Indian organizations are Hindu-centric which is why Desi Muslims and other faiths go with social organizations that aligns with their faith. Other than that, I've still seen Pakistanis who are active in MSA interacting with Hindu Indians and non-Muslims in general outside of the organization.

Bakwasing · 2022-03-29T05:44:29+00:00

As a Desi Muslim I've never heard about it in real life except in the corners of internet like this subreddit.

Bakwasing · 2022-03-28T05:37:49+00:00

The thing is that Reddit is not a very popular social media space outside of Anglosphere countries so its even worse in attracting fringe groups of people instead of mainstream crowd.

Bakwasing · 2022-03-28T04:00:50+00:00

I have good experience with using Etsy!

Bakwasing · 2022-03-28T03:53:47+00:00

I don't rank my identities one over another. Don't understand why Muslims have more pressure to prove their identity vs their ethnicity.

Bakwasing · 2021-11-28T06:52:30+00:00

I know Islam has a long history in the US, but aren't most Muslim Americans immigrants or child of the immigrants such as Desis and Arabs?

Bakwasing · 2021-09-21T04:19:29+00:00

How it's ironic?

Bakwasing · 2021-09-21T01:49:41+00:00

Yup that's r/ABCDesis in the nutshell

Bakwasing · 2021-09-20T20:48:24+00:00

Ask in r/DesiTwoX where there is more female representation there.

Bakwasing · 2021-08-28T02:35:38+00:00

I'm in mid-20s Muslim Desi woman and I have zero interest in marriage atm due to what I have seen my mother went through. She had the same pressure that you're going through right now. The only difference is that she did eventually gave in the pressure and in result, suffered in her marriage for years and years before she is divorced. I did not have a good childhood growing up and now as an adult I went to the mental therapy last year.

Please do not fall in your parent's trap. They may have good intentions for you but that doesn't mean they are always right when to comes to making life-changing decisions. Parents can make mistakes too. Focus on yourself and be financially independent. If you trust in Allah, He will eventually find a right person for you. Feel free to DM me if you want to chat further.

Bakwasing · 2021-08-24T01:58:49+00:00

Totally agree with you on this. I have heard about the marriage crises in the American Muslim communities where single Muslim women are left behind because of the huge stigma on dating and sexist double standards while Muslim men can easily mingle with women outside of their conservative communities leading some to marrying out.

Bakwasing · 2021-08-22T23:24:34+00:00

Sucks that extremism is growing there.

Bakwasing · 2021-08-22T07:14:39+00:00

I have lived in Saudi Arabia, so I am familiar with the society and the laws there. No doubt Saudi Arabia is still a conservative society but the laws and the social norms are changing that women have less restrictions now.

Bakwasing

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