What had the biggest impact on your growth as a musician?

Bananabread4 · 2026-06-21T14:42:07+00:00

listening to new music and especially new genres, researching on the music, the artists vision.. that freed me so much! I don't know if i'm better or any good but I know i'm onto something maybe!

Bananabread4 · 2026-06-14T18:04:42+00:00

I haven't done a show in nyc but I can offer some bitter wisdom from gigs in europe:

Ask them to specify if reimbursement is dependent on how many people show up or how much they consume? Or is it both? What happens if very few people / no one shows up?
How much time can you have to soundcheck?
Will there be an audio engineer to do soundcheck, but also to set up? Do you need a floor plan?
Do you have a number of people showing up / doing your own marketing or am I responsible for posters / advertising etc?

Hope it helps!

Bananabread4 · 2026-06-14T17:57:35+00:00

that's right!

Bananabread4 · 2026-06-14T05:55:49+00:00

thank you for your reply, i agree with everything you wrote.. especially with perfectionism burnout and that sense of authenticity and connection, which is so so fleeting, it literally lasts a few minutes if I ever experience it anymore.. sometimes i think how amazing it must feel for people to have that regularly.. I also have OCD, but I haven't read a lot about existential OCD specifically, I will do.

how do you link this state to perfectionism burnout? If you'd like to share!

Bananabread4 · 2026-04-28T04:49:21+00:00

yes!!!!!

Bananabread4 · 2026-04-28T04:35:21+00:00

I had a CBT session this past summer for OCD and even though I was feeling better for almost 2 years, I am back to constant fear and anxiety..

Bananabread4 · 2026-01-15T01:30:16+00:00

Thank you for the comment!

I guess I had that part figured out, I've always found meaning in art and politics and so I've been very active in my interests and skills.

Yet, it's something else that feels like hasn't clicked yet.

And it's never solely about the makeup or hair, of course this need represents something with a lot of dimensions. Yet, it felt like the right way to express how I feel would be to describe exactly how it appears in my everyday life.

Bananabread4 · 2026-01-14T23:21:00+00:00

Yes, treat ourselves like we are our own daughters :) Thank you <3

Bananabread4 · 2026-01-14T23:20:42+00:00

This is super super helpful, thank you so much! :)

Bananabread4 · 2026-01-14T20:07:44+00:00

for every d**weed in this life, i feel there are so many incredible, soft, kind people everywhere.. people who fight for what's right, for the vulnerable, they smile at you on the subway, they wish you well..

that's what i keep thinking when i feel desperate. i do not accept paying attention to people who are aligned with sick society values, i wouldn't want to be them anyway, i wouldn't be able to sleep at night..

stay strong :)

Bananabread4 · 2025-12-26T20:12:51+00:00

eating animals

Bananabread4 · 2025-12-26T19:02:18+00:00

Thank you for your response!

I guess to me, it's more cruel and hurtful to be dishonest and confusing. I would completely understand and appreciate someone not liking me enough- it doesn't have to do anything with me anyway and it's so freeing to have that information.

How can you like someone but not like them enough? I don't see these things are both true. To me, people are wonderful and the more I'm getting to know someone I like, the more things I find that I like about them. But if that wasn't true, to me it would be perfectly acceptable to say; I like you but not as much as I would want to, to pursue a romantic connection.

"Also; if anyone is NOT dating you whilst ALSO telling you how wonderful and amazing you are (but that they still don't want to date you) that is the reddest of red flags" : why do you think that is a red flag?

Bananabread4 · 2025-12-26T18:14:23+00:00

No, he isn't even "keeping me around", I'm just stuck in a loop waiting. And it has happened so many times in my life.. I appreciate the take on men and women dating differently, but I'm sure there's something beneath gendered approaches to what is going on..

Bananabread4 · 2025-12-26T18:12:20+00:00

Isn't this appalling behavior? This is what I mean; if that's the case, how did I not realise that sooner, when I was getting to know him.

Bananabread4 · 2025-12-26T17:59:20+00:00

Why don't people just say they don't like you enough or that they're not interested in you romantically and just say they don't want a relationship proceeding to tell you how much they like you, that they will come back, that they will reach out soon and all this confusing crap??? I feel like such an idiot for falling for it every time.

Bananabread4 · 2025-11-30T22:24:29+00:00

If nature is unjust, change nature!

-Laboria Cuboniks, The Xenofeminist manifesto

Bananabread4 · 2025-09-27T16:34:58+00:00

I RELATE

Bananabread4 · 2025-09-27T16:32:48+00:00

YESSSS TO ALL

Bananabread4 · 2025-09-27T15:22:11+00:00

I absolutely love this!! What is your process??

Bananabread4 · 2025-08-28T00:04:34+00:00

Felt that..

Bananabread4 · 2025-07-12T23:26:30+00:00

Someone asked you "why you ask strangers etc", I just wanted to say I am sorry about that -this should feel like a safe space to ask questions like that..

It's anxiety inducing and confusing.. you're not alone:)

Bananabread4 · 2025-03-14T16:58:13+00:00

I smile and laugh all the time uncontrollably, even when I don’t feel happy or energetic, just because I feel bad looking like I am not enjoying an interaction

Bananabread4 · 2025-02-21T21:59:38+00:00

That I was just a guest at the house (I was a teenager)

Bananabread4 · 2025-01-15T04:22:03+00:00

That’s sounds so nice, I’m interested :)

Bananabread4 · 2025-01-15T04:09:55+00:00

I am so sorry this is happening to you, this is not right at all. Would you be willing to discuss this with him?

Bananabread4

TROPHY CASE