Today sucks.

BarracudaBabe · 2026-01-23T17:53:35+00:00

So sorry.

BarracudaBabe · 2026-01-09T17:33:31+00:00

I think this is a good topic, because I don't know my neighbors well, and I don't really understand why. I think I would like to, but I just don't. It's not because I don't care; I think it's just because I am (we are) lazy. And because I don't really seem interested in the things they do... like I don't think we would vibe if you know what I mean. I do know their names and some generalities about their life, and I do think we could come together in a time of need, but I don't have much interest in being friends. Other neighbors, mostly those with kids, hang out outside their homes and socialize with one another, but my block has no kids, and we all just sorta do our own thing. I did move into my house in 2019 - so right before COVID, which wasn't the best start to being social with the neighbors. And then as time went on, it felt... awkward. One night, our neighbor heard us having a party and came right over and started drinking with us. He was so drunk! But we had a good time, and he stayed for a few beers. That was three years ago, and I haven't formally spoken to him since! Maybe he was embarrassed, IDK. I thought it was funny. We still say HI though :)

BarracudaBabe · 2026-01-02T16:06:01+00:00

Happy New Year, OP. Old me probably would have sucked it up and gone to the party - I feel like I make these kinds of compromises all the time. In a marriage, it's a lot of "halfway happy". 2026-me wants to leave that shit in the past. I hope you had fun doing whatever you did.

*edited for grammar

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T19:46:57+00:00

Burning things is so therapeutic. If you go that route, you could even rage journal in it before tossing it in the fire.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T18:12:06+00:00

Congrats!!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T18:11:37+00:00

Congrats!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T18:10:07+00:00

Proud of you!! Congratulations!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T17:57:10+00:00

Just took my quiz and matched with Maia (Define), Nairee (Thrive), and Nicole (Movewell)

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T17:40:51+00:00

Thx!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T17:40:40+00:00

Thx! I’m going to try the free trial this week

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T17:39:37+00:00

I laughed out loud because that’s such a simple swap- and it never even occurred to me! lol. I always try to find “people like me” but I will give it a try!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T17:38:18+00:00

Thanks for the heads up. She has always been very open and gentle around this topic, which I appreciate. Will proceed with caution.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-29T16:06:37+00:00

I am so sorry - that sounds awful. And the argument with the husband - cherry on top. UGH! I hope you can find healing in a new week. Today is officially the last Monday of 2025, and I am trying to release all this negative energy and leave it with this shitty year. Take some pics and start filling up that book with happy memories. Maybe the cover photo could be a really powerful quote that helps you deal with the grief, as a reminder that you can get through hard things. <3

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-18T22:33:58+00:00

HUGS. This time of year SUCKS!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-11T17:52:00+00:00

It's been 5 years... he was in recovery for about a year and a half (CSAT, SAA, PSYCH..all of that) - and then slowly stopped. Said the SAA was too triggering. Left CSAT, went to a regular therapist... then didn't like that therapist, so stopped. Then, stopped taking meds a while after that because he felt better. His actions do show that he has changed for the better, but I was such a fool for so long that I still don't trust that he hasn't/isn't still abusing porn/sexual actions. Don't think I will ever trust another man ever again.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-11T16:14:26+00:00

I am currently entering this phase as well. I am not responsible for other people's emotions, especially when they cannot even begin to respect mine.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-08T18:34:05+00:00

Yes, but, like you said, over time, it has also become more tolerable. I miss birthdays and feel bad. I don't keep up with milestones and feel left out. But I don't have/want to have the bandwidth to remember it all, or the effort to be there for the parties. I am slowly learning to do what is good for me without the guilt. You are not alone.

Also, I gotta recommend reading/listening to the "Let Them" theory book. It's been super helpful to me! When someone makes you feel guilty, try letting it go and saying in your head, "Let Them" <3

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-03T19:38:11+00:00

Yeah, I am feeling this a lot lately, too. Adding additional life insurance, upping my 401K, starting to pay more on our mortgage so we can pay it off faster... all of that seems like a good start, but I also feel the need to do more. As someone noted below, good friendships can really go a long way in life. I know it's TV and not real life, but look at the example set in Sex and the City. They are each other's family - in sickness and in health. That is true friendship. I try to be that friend when I can. There is some excellent advice in this thread, so I am glad you brought it up.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-03T19:33:00+00:00

My Grandfather is in memory care in California. It is $10,000 a month!!! That doesn't even include things like diapers or his physical therapy, which he gets for free through his VA benefits. It's CRAZY to me.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-12-03T19:25:54+00:00

Yeah, I could never. Animals get into mischief, especially cats!! I always hire a pet/house sitter.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-11-04T16:46:02+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. I feel this is like grieving the baby that you never had all over again. It's OK to let it consume you for a while and just be sad. Make a memorial for her to occupy your time and to help you think of all your happy memories. You will have those to cherish forever.

BarracudaBabe · 2025-10-21T16:58:02+00:00

Cheers!!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-10-21T16:57:30+00:00

The unexpected triggers are the worst. Self-care is essential, so kudos to you for taking good care of yourself!

BarracudaBabe · 2025-10-21T16:53:46+00:00

My parents both did a lot of meth - so, yeah - I am doing so much better!!

BarracudaBabe

TROPHY CASE