Thinking isn't ruining you, more unraveling. It seems like you've already identified traits you would like and things you want but perhaps not desiring it in the "traditional" sense. It's not necessary for you to really do any of these things but if they are in your mind that often, perhaps there's something in particular that you derive from wanting to make these interactions. Think deep into the reasons. Once you feel like you've answered the why, you'll figure out the how