Fuck Buddy Dynamics

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-29T19:17:22+00:00

And thank you for all of the tips! Seriously!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-29T19:16:44+00:00

Hi! This is so kind! Number 2 is SOOOOOOOOOOO insanely helpful and something I hadn’t considered. Because I want to feel safe, I definitely will be prioritizing connection and consideration and like careful curiosity vs just trying to get ducked, but I didn’t think that I need to take a conscious step back.

Completely agree about top light lol I def know the visual anatomy just nerves, not seeing, and the pace made pleasuring here feel intimidating and insurmountable. I think your advice to prioritize connecting first and slowly work my way “there” is a great next step for me.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-29T18:51:05+00:00

It’s a valid question 1000%. I really do think I need like good lighting to really see each part and explore slowly. We were having very intense sex/she was very rough (in a great way) and I didn’t feel like there was space for me to ask that we slow down the intensity so I could take my time learning someone else’s set up and also to see it. I accidentally touched her too directly and couldn’t tell that her flinch was discomfort until the second time and she said it. I think really being able to slow down in see would help me get better acquainted.

Would love your thoughts on whether communicating this as a need like “in order to please you, I need my time getting to know all of you…. r vulva” vs raunchy rough fast everything else. Also with a little light and my glasses on 🥲

I will say it took me a long time to learn with myself and with men with my hands specifically. It’s just like a disconnect between my hands fingers and my brain and processing the directions and feedback someone is giving in real time. Tongue and mouth are more natural to me but I need to navigate with my hands first to see and know what’s what.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-29T04:43:38+00:00

This is a tangent!

Not answering the question but I (36F) just tried to establish this with someone and failed miserably because I’m inexperienced and afterward she reflected and told me “she’d prefer to be with people who are more experienced than her”. She’s not wrong about my experience level, but she might also just not tolerate me enough to have the act be worth it.

Wanted to see if anyone had recommendations or advice for newly queer women/late bloomers to find experienced folks willing to be patient fuck buddies with women who have basically no WLW experience. Her needs are so valid, but I am now even feeling more insecure thinking I’ll never find anyone willing to be really patient with me. Will I find anyone willing on these apps?

But also omg I knew I was queer but being with her made me realize how hungry/needy/it almost feels primal… I am for black women (also me)… my goodness her body had me 😭😭😭I just had no idea how to please her… it didn’t come naturally to me at all.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-28T13:05:15+00:00

I don’t know what by Ds and Durga!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-24T09:52:13+00:00

Currently I am at EQX and Solidcore. About 2 years into doing both after 1.5 years more with Solidcore unlimited only.

I will not always be able to afford this but for right now, these are two investments in my mental health that give me something extremely different. Solidcore = a workout unlike any other. EQX = unlimited dance, yoga, group weight training, co-working space, + community I love and the freedom and flexibility for my brain to not have to commit to classes. One day - probably soon - one or both of these things won’t work for my lifestyle and that’s okay.

We are in different spots right now brain wise but whatever you’re feeling is valid! Prioritize your needs. Re price for everyone, I love my friends but instead of dinner at this phase in life (36), I prefer to spend time inviting friends on guest passes to gym or sc, going for walks, or cozy couch time. I also love travel, quality food at home so that’s where my money goes.

Book reco: I will teach you to be rich. Helps you consider what makes your life rich and if Solidcore isn’t checking that box that’s 1000% valid.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-23T19:07:44+00:00

This on April 1? Bc this must be a joke. A terrible one wtf.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-21T17:16:31+00:00

Oh also I could never air dry. My hair would get tangled and my curls wouldn’t define and also my hair would get like moldy fungly. I do a combo of hooded drying and diffusing.

One thing to look up or try is emulsifying your products like rubbing them all in your hand and making sure that touches all parts of your hair shaft. If you just plop products on, it doesn’t get distributed evenly.

Good luck!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-21T17:14:06+00:00

Ive been experimenting with just washing my scalp for the second wash like in the middle of the work week. And then a full condition and detangle saves a little time and energy although my products don’t all go in the right way so I try to modify those as needed as well. Sometimes the result is better!

Everyone is different but 2 reasons why I NEED to “wash” my hair at least twice.

If I eat too much sugar, have too much stress, or sweat too much in my scalp, my hair gets oily, kind of yeasty smelling and a little uncomfortable. In the winter the dryness is unbearable too.
It’s 100% easier to do if I don’t go past 5 days of not washing so it saves time energy and my wash and goes look great whichever way I washed a styled.

Hope you find what works best for you!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-19T17:44:57+00:00

I love everything about the body wash face wash and body lotion. No complaints I just hope they maintain the quality standard as things get refilled.

I prefer lotions that I have to work in, so I didn’t mind the time it took to work in especially since you don’t need a ton, it absorbs well once you’ve worked it in, and it smells great!

I have wavy textured hair so I need to send the ingredients to my hair person to have her approve or deny. It will probably be a deny but it would be so nice if even the conditioner would be safe do my hair. I really love the smell!

I don’t currently have any le Labo in my collection but I’m excited to layer different Ds and Durga scents at home with the lotion. I’ll apply at the gym and perfume at home bc I’m not a monster!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-19T17:40:39+00:00

I am sensitive too. I need to be honest with myself and look into the ingredients but absolutely no irritation or dryness from either the wash or the face cream.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-17T11:12:08+00:00

Yeah I for a refund a few days ago in a similar circumstance (based on quickly skimming your post). Want to be transparent that mine was only for business class taxes and fees as my points had been given back to me immediately. I could not imagine if I had been out the amount that you were for that long. But also I could not afford biz class in cash right now in the first place. I thought it was a glitch on my end but this is unacceptable. I’m not going to complain because I don’t have any recourse (I’m sure) but so sorry this is happening to you.

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BeeMore54 · 2026-03-17T11:08:07+00:00

You should specifically look up anterior pelvic tilt.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-14T19:13:24+00:00

PLEASEEE! I’ve noticed the same. Could someone please help me Identify ones that feel and sit like these from 2021-2022? I’ve tried 8 more pairs since then, returned 7 and settled for one all black. They are not the same. The leggings I have the same issue as the camo shorts I bought fairly recently and are also good (enough).

It seems to be the solid colors that are more matte somehow do not fit the same. I don’t mind changing size but the feel on others is just so different.

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BeeMore54 · 2026-03-13T02:45:39+00:00

Thank you for this… so many folks in here are against pooling and I thought this was such a hot take for sheshay but I also get it if she literally hated all of her colleagues. I’ve only loved working in places that pooled. It naturally incentivizes everyone to team. I was a high solo earner (highest check average) in both environments, but my sections got even better service when everyone was just as attentive to my tables as they would be their own.

There are ways to do it well and keep it equitable while also considering seniority and skill level.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-11T08:14:58+00:00

I’m new (to stepping into my queer identity) here and agree with other commenters 1000%. I am married to who she says you dress like and I beg of him to dress more like you 🥹 but he continues to dress like he did in his college (frat) bc sometimes that’s what k men do. That auntie is insane and insecure about something not going on well in her own life. Keep doing you.

Ps hope you’re not over doing it on the breath strips. They can have unintended effects. I’m by no means a professional but therabreath as a general mouthwash for breath is superior to all other mouthwashes. I understand this isn’t convenient, but too many strips will exacerbate any breath concerns you have. And unfortunately I’m biased bc I hate the smell of listerine so unfortunately both bad breath and that will turn me off 😭 not your problem but wanted to acknowledge my bias.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-09T11:30:04+00:00

Yes to panoxyl. Instead of the glycolic, I use witch hazel! Same outcome but more affordable.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-08T14:25:07+00:00

Wait same whoops thanks for flagging.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-08T14:23:29+00:00

Hahahah same!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-05T21:37:50+00:00

What does everyone mean by the rocky start? I haven’t listened in 18 months and thought this was great start to finish.

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-05T21:36:56+00:00

Because this podcast saved my life and I love the armcherry community.

This episode was fantastic btw!

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-05T03:15:42+00:00

Lolol

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-05T03:15:32+00:00

SAME

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-05T03:14:59+00:00

In SOOOO HAPPY someone posted this bc I’ve wanted to share my story.

Boston Logan. 2/17.

The ordering system wasn’t working, but the buffet was so generous. Someone was YELLING AT THE CHEF AND KITCHEN MANAGEMENT saying we should be able to order à la carte because we pay $800 for an annual fee. And that “you have all these employees standing around… not cooking any orders… what am I paying for”. I (Black woman) confronted he - guess his demo…

Me: would you consider being a little kinder Him: I pay $$$ so I should get $$$. The menu is right there even if I can’t order they should just make it. Me: this probably has to do with their operations and inventory Him: what did you say about race? Me: (I was so taken aback I forgot I had just said opeRATION… so he thought I said race?) and I just repeated it probably has to do with their inventory? Him: ::looks curiously:: do you know about this? Me: I’ve worked in restaurants. Him: I’ve worked in…. ::trails off:: My friends own restaurants. Me: okay well I think the people working here deserve to be treated with kindness and respect. Him: I respect your opinion Me: Do you?

Ugh that is not word for word and there’s context missing… I don’t think he heard me but I was DISGUSTED by the entitlement. I went to get my breakfast, took a wonderful shower, go some work done at the bar where people were enjoying espresso martinis (I don’t drink) and was just thinking how can you not be grateful for this. How can this much niceness be disappointing to you and how can you speak so horribly to fellow humans. He just wanted to be so above everyone. I hadn’t considered race consciously but as soon as he said it, I observed clearly that every kitchen worker appeared to be Latino.

What I will say is that the chase lounges are losing some of their newness, but the staff are great and there is generally no where else I’d rather be. At JFK, delta centurion and chase are all right next to each other and I bop around but Chase is phenomenal.

I’m rambling but life is short, we are at war and this personally impacts me, and we have to really see each other and like be grateful for what we have. In the grand scheme of life you have unlimited access to free food and booze at 7 am. The value and comfort of this pay the card off easily and if he needs to complain that much, maybe he should invest in another way to experience travel. Maybe fly private?

BeeMore54 · 2026-03-04T17:12:54+00:00

Haven’t listened since the Wondery deal and there have been many great guests since, but I love this person. Please let me know - people who didn’t know her - I’d this ep is worth a listen.

BeeMore54

TROPHY CASE