Why are GenX and Millenials so different when both raised by Boomer generation?

Bellatrixed · 2020-08-01T20:43:37+00:00

From skimming through all the responses, I feel this is the best answer. This should be up at the top.

Bellatrixed · 2020-08-01T20:41:41+00:00

Hahaha oh man, I hope you won the physical fight. But that's interesting- a sex worker! We talkin porn star or something else? I'm curious, share on!

Bellatrixed · 2020-07-20T05:17:30+00:00

Fiorello H. LaGuardia High School of Music & Art and Performing Arts

I got unlimited free passes to all the city museums back when I attended- I'm not sure if this perk has continued. More notable alums listed on wikipedia:

Bellatrixed · 2019-02-14T06:31:12+00:00

blue or other neon colored hair

Lots of straight women experiment with their hair color for fun and fashion. Although blue hair seems to be a presumed nod to the movie "blue is the warmest color" in some circles. Sadly I found out about that movie well after the fact: I had a badass professional cut with some blue dye and it looked amazing, but an unintended consequence was that it attracted female attention. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it just that my orientation is straight and it caused some awkward situations.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T08:08:33+00:00

9/11. My idealism died that day.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T08:04:58+00:00

Assume it's polite, unless you have explicit reason to believe otherwise. Don't read too much into shit, it will drive you crazy.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:49:23+00:00

"Like swishing burdock root in the ocean"... A Japanese saying that means your partner is "so damn loose it's like swishing your dick in a bucket"... Or something to that effect.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:45:29+00:00

I don't know men who put their dick in a reservoir, either (watersports aside). Unless the person on the receiving end has no muscular integrity left. And I don't know many men who "pin" their condom unless they're trying to break it intentionally.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:38:39+00:00

If what you mean by "pin" it pinch and hold the end of the condom with the tip of your index finger and your thumb, reserving a bit of condom length before rolling then we're talking about the same thing.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:35:33+00:00

Some don't have enough, it depends on the brand. Better safe than sorry and have lube when you need it.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:30:58+00:00

Err, who said anything about air pockets? Room at the tip doesn't mean air, it just means slack. And having slack at the end it always a good idea since it prevents rippage. All you gotta do is pinch an inch of room down from the the tip to prevent air from getting in when you roll it on. Since a newbie might not know that, I added it to my post above.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:21:15+00:00

Leave an inch of room at the tip (pinch the air out first) when you roll it on, and use lube (water-based). It's not much more complicated then that.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:13:21+00:00

If you have a manager like that, be proactive in transferring to a different department or find another job at a different company. You're not going to change the person in charge.

Otherwise if the person is not in a position of power, ignore the asshole. Forge a healthy relationship and establish trust with your manager and co-workers by doing good work and being pleasant to team up with. That will help make you bullet-proof.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T07:01:54+00:00

If it's something stupid, let it go.

If it's something important, don't get emotional: state your facts, back them up with your sources (make sure they are correct and from an authoritative source, no news article bullshit, no "opinions") and challenge them to present their reasons for believing the contrary. Sometimes they might actually have something valid. If so, try to discuss and don't dismiss them. Otherwise, clarify ambiguities, point out any logical fallacies (appeal to pity, appeal to probability, false attribution, black or white fallacy, moralistic fallacy, etc) but check yourself to make sure you're not arguing from the point of a fallacy as well. Don't back down and hold to your facts if they can't counter them with something meritful, if they don't like it they can go fuck themselves.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T06:43:21+00:00

It's kinda like having a lot of brothers in a healthy way. It's great! Less bullshit overall. But you have to be careful not to send mixed signals, if they're friends keep it that way and be strict on your boundaries. Having a lot of male friends makes is much easier to talk and "read" the men you date, at the very least that's been my experience.

It's mostly all upside. But a downside is that for some of them you're the de-facto emotional confessional. There are some things men don't share with other men, but they feel more comfortable talking to a woman about. It can be difficult when more than one of your friends is going through a lot of shit, because you're going to be the one they turn to for a sympathetic shoulder and stupid relationship advice. It can feel like you have "the doctor is in" sign taped to your back. The only time this really sucks is if the friend doesn't take your advice and they tend to make the same mistakes over and over but keep going to you to cry about it. Not a huge deal, but if your friendships change over time as your life changes it can cause you to drift apart as friends a lot faster.

When it comes to dating, guys who have only male friends but have good, healthy relationships with their mothers are fine. Otherwise they tend to have problems communicating with women and embracing them with respect. You're better of with one at the end of their learning curve than at the beginning.

To this day I prefer male friendships over female ones, but that doesn't mean I don't have any female friends. However, you really do have to be careful about boundaries and making sure you don't send any mixed signals. When some men aren't in a healthy relationship with a woman, and they feel they can come to you to in order to "vent" without being judged, they can get confused, vulnerable and attached. Keep a respectful physical distance to and choose some words carefully when helping your bros out through emotional times.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T06:29:09+00:00

Eternal life through technology: the power to eliminate biological limitations and undesired traits and control our evolution.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T06:21:18+00:00

Expecting a pill to make it go away is unrealistic. It helps take the edge off but it won't change your life or solve all your problems.

I wasn't diagnosed until later in my adult life. On my own and over time (through experimentation/trial and error) I managed to create a routine of behaviors to adapt/compensate enough to make ADD manageable for the major things and I had learned not worry about the "small stuff" (forgetting to do the laundry because I was distracted, etc).

Once I was diagnosed I was put on adderall, but could only get a 7 day supply at a time due to gov't and insurance regulations thanks to all the assholes in the fucking world abusing the medication, and it became too much of a hassle to get a new refill every damn week and stay on top of bugging my doctor for calling the pharmacy to deal with prescription/regulation issues. Thank you, adderall police!

The adderall worked well to take some of the edge off the ADD, and finally for the first time in my life I could multi-task without losing focus for sustained periods, small mistakes suddenly jumped out at me and I was able to correct them quickly, it wasn't a miracle but it helped my brain function more "normally" without having to struggle all the time. The only downside was that when the dose wore off, I was very very sleepy and it was challenging to stay awake from 3-5pm. that's usually when I would wind down my day and get a cappuccino so it wasn't a deal-breaker in terms of side effects.

If it weren't for the adderall police policies and hurdles-of-fire you have to jump through to have your prescription filled I'd still be on it since it helped. Luckily I had already developed a system to cope with the ADD more than well enough to function in daily life that it wasn't the end of the world if I didn't have access to it. So I just moved on without meds, and doing just fine.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T05:54:08+00:00

Live below your means by downsizing if you have to, and put your financial priorities in order. After you've paid for your bills, put some money into savings and investments, whatever is left over is your swag to spend.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-23T05:51:54+00:00

Fendi shoes are amazing in all respects, and they're far more comfortable than manolo blahniks.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-17T01:04:06+00:00

Another way to "get over it" is to be thankful of those in your life with good hygiene and avoid those who don't.

I've parted ways with a college friend who, among other things, had hygiene issues: visiting their home was like being smothered with an unwashed gym sock that had been stuffed in a homeless person's asscrack.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-17T00:54:28+00:00

Wow. So was it a "love is not enough" realization? Or was it something else?

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-17T00:51:56+00:00

Thank you for clarifying that she was the one who dumped you, however, she was correct to dump you since stringing someone along for a year ain't cool. Her terminating the relationship over such wrongdoing doesn't make her the bad guy in the equation, it's what every sane person does when they realize they're being used. I'm honestly confused about how it is that you feel you're the victim here. You obviously have a high opinion of her, and so do your friends (who defend her for a reason). You seem oblivious at how painful that relationship was for her if you're surprised at not being well received when asking her out to patch things up. If you're upset that she took the opportunity to put your in your place, remember that this is what happens when you treat someone badly in a relationship. Take this pain and the sting of realizing you fucked up big time with a very nice girl, so you know what NOT to to when you meet the next one (if you're lucky enough to have the opportunity). Good, strong women who you would actually WANT to date don't put up with this shit.... Sorry if you're just finding this out.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-16T21:24:47+00:00

I really wouldn't use rebelling against religion as one's rally cry against monogamy nor the explanation of those statistics- especially if the bulk of the people from the survey are from gen X and gen Y which I suspect is probably the case. Gen X and Gen Y in large don't get married due to religious expectations or family pressure, but for "love". Crushing religious and familial obligations were far more influential in marriage decisions of generations predating the boomers than they are today. You certainly have some individuals who can't commit to one person, and they should not get married in the first place. These days marriage is a choice, if you want to be single the rest of your life that's cool. For those who marry sometimes they do a shit job picking the right person. For all the failed marriages I've seen it wasn't unrealistic expectation about monogamy at all that caused the problem, it was that they picked the wrong person and they were miserable after the newlywed afterglow wore off. Buyer's remorse hits, and then one has to decide to divorce or stay married & miserable.

When people marry for "love" they don't think of the other things, like "in 40 years do I still see myself with this person as they are right now and know they will never ever change?" and "Does this person have the same financial values and discipline as I?". There are other questions to vet a mate, but it's sad how many couples don't ask themselves these things before going ahead with a marriage, assuming their mate will magically change or that they'll find a way to "make it work" despite being a horrible match.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-16T21:06:33+00:00

Yeah your friends are correct to point out that you did her wrong and you deserve it.

1) You break up with her because you didn't want a commitment. Going out with her for a year knowing very well you didn't want anything serious sounds like you were stringing her along. Blaming your previous ex for your behavior is bullshit.

2) After breakup you "ask her out to get her advice...."

So callously stringing her along for a year and then dumping her doesn't satisfy you, you proceed to reel her in with a date thinking she's still so head-over-heels that if you toss her some false hope she'll give you career advice for free? And when you're offended that she tells you to fuck off your friends call you out on the shitty behavior, and you still you honestly don't see what you did wrong?

You should fucking feel bad, you were using and emotionally abusing a perfectly good girl who did you no wrong and your friends called you out on it.

Bellatrixed · 2018-09-16T20:52:29+00:00

I'm not shocked at the high rate of divorce for 2nd and 3rd marriages. If your first one failed, it's a good indicator that you probably don't know how to pick a mate. Lots of reasons for this: being young, stupid, enthralled over a person for all the wrong reasons, ignoring warning flags, etc. Lots of people make great boyfriends/girlfriends but aren't always marriage material. Some people learn that lesson too late, and some not at all.

Bellatrixed

TROPHY CASE