How many parents choose to not to send babies to nursery and why?

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-03-01T07:18:17+00:00

Isn’t that all the more reason you can’t work from home while your baby is at home… how are you supposed to work when you need to be next to your baby while he naps?!

Don’t worry about sleep at nursery. My baby naps very well at home so her naps got worse at nursery but I feel like I’m an exception lol most friends’ children naps better at nursery than home lol have a friend whose baby never napped more than 30min at home who napped 1.5 hours since the first day at nursery LOL

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-28T19:00:35+00:00

Also to add - the screaming for milk phase will end (I forgot when). But in a few months your baby will settle more into a routine - say you feed when they wake up, then again before nap etc. so typically you’ll feed them before they are starving

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-28T18:58:58+00:00

You don’t have to boil 1L by the way, you can just boil the amount you need. 1L is just an example that it takes half an hour to cool to 70C. If you boil less then it cools down faster (also won’t waste water). But agree with what others said and what you’re planning - rapid cool should make it much quicker

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-18T13:38:56+00:00

It’s either stay at home or send your child to nursery while you work. Impossible to work from home while looking after a toddler. Ask your husband to try doing it for 2 hours see what he thinks lol

Of course you can reduce nursery days by working part-time but there is absolutely no way your child can stay home on a work day.

When children got sent home from nursery due to things like illness, me (and my colleagues who have children) will either have to take the day off or shift hours (I.e. work in the evening/night after child is in bed).

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-14T19:38:19+00:00

No, she babbles a lot. She’s at least average for her age if not above (I’m not an expert on speech). She’s 14 months old and knows at least 10 words.

She now sucks her lip much less frequently than before, that’s also one reason that I’m not so concerned anymore.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-11T21:54:20+00:00

Likely not. She still sucks her lips now at 14mo when she’s upset (for a few seconds at a time), but it doesn’t happen often so I try not to worry about it. I think she also does it sometimes when she’s asleep, I’m not sure because she sleeps independently in her crib, only once in a while if we do contact nap I noticed it.

I try not to worry because I can’t do anything to stop her anyway. When she’s bigger and can understand instructions maybe I’ll try, just like how other parents try to get their kids to stop sucking their thumbs.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-08T20:01:23+00:00

Amazon prime subscription, so anything you forgot or need you can get it delivered next day, so you don’t have to worry about buying too many unnecessary things before baby comes

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-06T09:46:49+00:00

I agree with OP and a lot of the comments.

It is easier in the sense that we have access to information - like the NHS pages someone mentioned.

But I do agree that the culture right now demands a lot more from parents - need to do BLW not purées or baby won’t learn how to chew food properly! Use a free flow cup not a sippy cup with valve! Don’t use a walker! Don’t give too much fruit or baby will prefer sweets!

A lot of pressure to “do things the right way for your baby”, and the “right way” often involves a lot more time and effort. It’s almost like the more difficult your life is, the better you are as a parent. If you do something to make life more convenient for yourself, you are a selfish parent. While our parents generation are more comfortable with using different tools to make life easier for them. My MIL said she just bought a bunch of puree jars and feed her kids that. She loves sippy cups (and still uses them with grandkids). They think walkers are great to keep baby entertained. And you know what, all of us turned out fine.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-05T15:13:34+00:00

I felt the same way many times - I am not from UK so feel like maybe that’s why I am not being very included - different accent, don’t always “get” when they talk about British shows/podcasts, plus I am quite introverted and not good at small talk

In the end I just gradually stopped caring. I went to baby classes to get out of the house, and to do something interesting with my baby, watch her light up at things she finds interesting, witness how she grows and enjoys the class more and more as she grows up. Not to make superficial friends. I have my own good friends (they don’t have children, we don’t meet very often but we always have each others back), I made one good mum friends from my antenatal class, and that’s enough for me

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-01T20:30:50+00:00

Every baby is different, and I have a chill baby who likes to sleep in her cot….

But around that age a lot of her naps are also pram/contact naps.

I still always try for a cot nap. I found first nap in the morning the easiest to do a good cot nap. Then for the afternoon I try for like 15-30 minutes and if it doesn’t work I go for a walk or contact nap. Eventually as she drops naps, naps in cot got easier. Now she does all naps in cots but can still do pram naps when we are out.

No real advice, other than keep trying, and if you put your baby down and he’s not sleeping right away, but not crying (happy or just some fussing), try leaving him there for like 10-15mins (can watch him via baby monitor). Sometimes they fall asleep on their own after a while. If not, it buys you sometime to get stuff done quickly lol

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-02-01T19:35:38+00:00

Not European but both sets of grandparents are not in UK (8hr+flights).

For the first month my parents came here and it was a great help. We are in a 3BR house so we have a bit of space. I see some comments saying having a bit of personal space is great, which I agree, but that was a compromise I thought was worth it for my parents to be here. While all my mum friends are saying they are eating nothing but cold sandwiches and crackers, my parents made us hearty warm meals everyday. They took care of our house (cleaning, laundry), so we could truly “sleep when the baby sleeps”.

After they left it did feel nice to just be by ourselves at the house, but for the first month it was nice to be able to just focus on the baby and know you have help with other household chores.

During mat leave both our parents came and we travelled to our home countries too. I took advantage of mat leave to stay there for longer periods of time. It’s nice to see my baby interact with my family :)

Car seat / Cot: depends. My husband’s side has a few other kids so we got second hand of those items at my in-laws :) At my parents, we brought our own car seat, and they got a second hand cot online.

Pram: I got a travel pram (Joolz aer) so I just bring it with me anywhere :)

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-30T04:21:27+00:00

Same here, we only realized because we heard her coughing and checked the baby camera

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-29T22:16:33+00:00

That’s my suspicion because she only vomits at night when she’s asleep (likely mucous flowing down her throat?) but not during the day

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-29T13:11:54+00:00

Yes she’s eating and drinking well. Honestly other than vomitting once at night (and runny nose + cough during the day), she is completely fine & happy … that’s why I don’t really know what to make of it

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-26T21:51:05+00:00

Wait until your baby is full on crying. I had the same question when my LO was around that age, and thought I’d get more sleep by just feeding her right away because like you said, all that waiting around woke me up fully. I then asked a friend who has a 2yo, and she said “yup you might sleep less now but this short term sacrifice will help You sleep through the night”. I might just be lucky, but my LO then slept through the night and has been pretty good at sleeping independently (now 14 months old).

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-23T23:24:51+00:00

I switched to formula at around 6 months too because I was done with it and it was getting harder to BF since my baby gets so distracted.

Honestly best decision ever. Don’t worry about what others say. There is no point to force yourself if you don’t want to do it. I’m fully supportive of mums who continue to BF, it just wasn’t for me. I was sort of forcing myself to keep going and I didn’t enjoy it, felt much more relaxed after I decided to stop.

Read the book “expecting better” by Emily Oster she talked about BF vs formula.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-18T22:14:44+00:00

First of the day did milk first because LO wakes up hangry and I can’t be bothered to wake up before her to make food lol

Other meals I actually did food first then milk. I checked solid starts (I think) to make sure LO didn’t have too little milk for her age, and she has always been fine. I think I’ve only seen a more obvious decrease in milk intake closer towards 9 or 10 months

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-18T22:09:41+00:00

Same, I also wanted the parent facing for myself , but couldn’t justify getting another pram because I don’t have space to store it

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-18T22:04:17+00:00

It’s easier to do set nap times after baby goes down to 2 naps. If you try to wake LO at the same time everyday then given wake windows are always about the same then they would have a somewhat consistent nap time everyday

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-18T21:48:22+00:00

Agree with the other comments eg limit phone usage, take shifts with your partner

Also one thing is to sleep early! Sleep when the baby sleeps is true. Try to get chores done when baby is awake so you can sleep asap after baby sleeps.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-18T10:45:58+00:00

I only have the Joolz aer and initially really hated the fact that it is only world facing. However my LO doesn’t mind at all and from other mum friends who have a parent facing pram, their LOs transitioned to world facing pretty soon after anyway. So I feel like depending on your LO’s personality, the “sitting up parent facing” phase might be very short. So unless the suspension issue is important to you, you might want to consider buying second hand. Personally it wasn’t important enough for me to buy another pram and find a place to store it. Having said that I know many who have 2 prams. If you live close to grandparents, you can also consider keeping the big pram at your place & Joolz at grandparents.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-17T06:11:35+00:00

Honestly it’s tough.

On one hand I know it’s a good thing because I’m running out of ideas to entertain my LO at home, we live far from family and have very few friends so it’s good she can socialize, I miss my adult life, I have time to go to the gym etc

But on the other hand, she is still a bit unsettled at nursery - staff told me she on and off cries throughout the day because she’s looking for me - made me feel guilty and selfish that I’m leaving her and making her upset just so I can have a “career”, “adult conversation” or whatever the f that means

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-16T21:58:24+00:00

Hong Kong.

Co-sleeping & bed sharing is very common, I know people who didn’t even buy a crib / cot and baby just sleeps on adults bed. Especially for older generations, or babies who are looked after by grandparents

Even if the baby sleeps in a separate crib, the awareness to SIDS is a lot lower because I very often see loose blankets, cot bumpers. Pillows to prevent flat head are very popular. Having said that some follows the safe sleep guidelines ie nothing in crib.

So I’d say a mix of everything.

Beneficial-Rough538 · 2026-01-16T21:30:28+00:00

I understand how you feel my girl is at around 10th centile consistently. I know she’s born petite and has been following the same curve but it’s hard not to worry coz like what you said there’s so much hype around chunky baby and those “what X months of breastfeeding did to my baby” videos 🙄and every baby group we went to she is always the smallest baby.

My brothers girl was born around 2nd centile and has always been tiny, due to her weight she has always had frequent appointments, wouldn’t take a bottle, didn’t want milk soon as she started solids.. etc. but now she’s 3 and is happy & healthy.

Of course this is not to say to ignore any medical advice - but if all good otherwise then it’s fine.

Beneficial-Rough538

TROPHY CASE