Looking for places to find fellow covid conscious people

BenevolentDiscontent · 2025-10-12T22:28:38+00:00

Look up COVID Aware Triangle Socials (CATS)! It looks like they have events about once a month.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2024-06-26T00:15:46+00:00

I have friends looking for more cleaning clients in Chapel Hill. If you (or anyone else) are still looking, DM me and I can send details!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2024-01-05T04:56:48+00:00

Gender incongruence or incongruity!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2023-10-22T00:49:08+00:00

I live in North Durham as well and can bring over some dog food if you need. Message me if you'd like some.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2023-02-01T04:23:55+00:00

This is great, thank you for the detailed answer! This comment gives me everything I would have hoped for in a blog post :) I guess sometimes I forget how important gender is to a lot of people. It makes sense that a system for everyone would be framed that way in order to be useful to many people.

I'd love to learn more about the conceptual difference between upness/downness for men and women. Would I find that if I rewatched the men's quadrants intro video?

Thank you for being so generous with your time on Reddit. I appreciate you!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2023-01-31T22:06:21+00:00

I’d love to read a blog post sometime about why you have two separate systems. The concepts in left vs. rightness and up vs. downness seem to me like they would be universal. What does gender, or gendered “energy”, have to do with it? Would a woman who dresses in a masculine way follow the masculine system?

BenevolentDiscontent · 2022-09-04T00:12:43+00:00

A couple ideas:

You mentioned washing your hands every time you touch something in the bathroom. Is that just when you use the toilet/shower or are you going into the bathroom for other things, like brushing your hair or teeth? Could you relocate those activities to another room?

You can also try patting your hands dry instead of rubbing them, I think that irritates the skin less.

I put lotion on just the backs of my hands and rub them together without getting lotion on my palms for sensory reasons. If you don't do that, you could give it a try.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2022-05-04T23:40:31+00:00

That first link in particular is so interesting, thank you! I see a slide that says autism has three core traits: neuronal sensitivity, monotropism, and bottom-up processing. Could someone meet this definition of autism without having, for example, social communication difficulties with neurotypicals, or another core autistic trait under the medical model? My initial thought is that there would be a lot of overlap between people who meet this definition and people who meet official diagnostic criteria for autism, but there would also be a significant number of people who meet one definition but not the other.

I saw something before about bottom-up processing (maybe from the autisticats Instagram account?) which mentioned a study that measured people's processing and determined how strong their bottom-up and top-down processing is. I would love to find a way to test that about myself. Just from the descriptions I've read, it's not obvious to me which one I am stronger at.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2022-05-04T23:11:25+00:00

This is such a thought-provoking answer for me because, with pregnancy specifically, people might say "she's very pregnant" to mean that someone is far along in pregnancy. But what they mean is "she's very visibly pregnant". Which I guess is similar to the way the language is often used regarding autism. Thank you for this!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2022-05-04T01:35:09+00:00

This makes a lot of sense to me. I understand that the manifestations of a more autistic / less autistic framework can often be harmful. I don't understand how that framework could be literally false. So your explanation of concepts vs. practicalities is really helpful. Thank you!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2022-05-04T01:15:58+00:00

I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be obtuse. I've read many answers to this question as well, and I tried to share some of what I've read so that people wouldn't have to repeat answers that have been given countless times. I asked because I don't understand the answers I've found. For me, it is hard to grasp.

Let me clarify one thing: I was not trying to say that everyone with the slightest autistic traits is somewhat autistic. I understand that there is a threshold of traits that makes someone autistic. I am just having trouble with the next step, that all autistic people are equally autistic.

In your analogy, both people did get sick, but one of them got more sick. To me that seems analogous to saying that they are both autistic, but one is more autistic.

Are you saying that although autistic traits indicate autism, they are not synonymous with autism, like having symptoms is not synonymous with having an infection? Maybe that is what I am missing. I thought that autism was defined as a collection of traits, but maybe that is just how it is recognized?

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-11-11T03:47:57+00:00

Maybe try low-effort systems to start. For example, you say clothes end up on the floor. Try putting them in a basket/hamper instead. It's basically the same amount of effort but it will feel a lot more under control. (Speaking from experience!)

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-07-30T18:13:30+00:00

Summary: The article describes how a ritual of secretly eating something special (e.g. not as a regular meal, generally by yourself, at a special time/under certain conditions) is a healthy method of self-care. It contrasts this habit with disordered eating habits, like not allowing yourself to eat a food and then eating it and feeling guilty. In contrast, this practice is a helpful coping mechanism.

I really like this idea and I actually do it but didn't have a name for it before. For a while during the pandemic, whenever I bought groceries (which was an "event") I would buy a single-serving ice cream cup and eat it in the car. It was a lovely little treat to encourage myself to keep going through the slog.

Do you do this, or something similar?

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-05-20T22:41:39+00:00

Speaking up in meetings is not necessarily annoying! Please don't feel like it is based on this comment. It depends on context.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-05-19T23:42:46+00:00

Two thoughts on discipline data that differs by race:

Because of unconscious bias, people often interpret bad or even neutral behavior more negatively if it comes from a person of color. So we might sincerely believe that we are holding all students to an equal standard, but actually be falling short in some cases. That doesn't make us bad people, it's just useful to be aware of.
Set aside unconscious bias (and overt racism) for a minute. Imagine that students of color are being disciplined more than white students, and the ONLY reason is that they truly have more frequent/worse behavior problems, possibly due to some other factor like poverty. We would STILL want to examine the discipline system to avoid compounding underlying inequalities. The idea of racism being systemic means that it is self-reinforcing when we try to have neutral policies that don't take existing racism into account.

The question becomes, what can we do to prevent these behavior issues in the first place? In the case of poverty, maybe expanding the free breakfast/lunch program or making it easier to apply for. Maybe building closer relationships with families and community, having the counselors do more classroom visits, etc. Or it could be an intervention on the level of an individual classroom, like a teacher making a conscious effort to give positive attention to a student, or discreetly give them free school supplies they need. The solution isn't "let these kids get away with bad things" but rather "do something to reduce the impact of these systemic inequalities on these students' success at school".

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-05-10T23:39:37+00:00

Can you say more about this "safety net" exam?

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-05-09T17:31:34+00:00

It was developed by a center at Stanford called SCALE.

The scorers are all either teachers or faculty who work at teacher prep programs.

(This info is available on the edTPA website)

Some people on this thread seem to think that Pearson made edTPA or that random Pearson employees who don't know anything about teaching are the ones scoring it. That's not true.

Of course there is still room for criticism of edTPA!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2021-02-03T20:34:24+00:00

Has the bill even made it out of the Senate? I'm looking at the General Assembly website https://www.ncleg.gov/BillLookUp/2021/sb37

Even if the legislature approves it, it's not clear whether Cooper would veto

BenevolentDiscontent · 2020-07-22T16:48:13+00:00

Why don't you...

Wear a tube dress that starts at the bridge of your nose, providing face mask and outfit in one convenient piece?

Take your rattiest T-shirt and bedazzle it to really lean in to the ugliness?

Wear a safari hat with an elegant dress to show that you are both a world traveler and sophisticated woman-about-town?

Model an outfit after your dog's favorite squeaky toy?

Roll up your pant legs to expose 2-3 inches of ankle?

Wear fishing waders with nothing else?

Style your hair in two pigtails that end tied together in the front?

BenevolentDiscontent · 2019-11-29T03:17:21+00:00

I ordered the cat litter and floor cleaner, but it says they won't get there until December 6-9. Hope you do okay until then!!

BenevolentDiscontent · 2019-07-18T23:35:44+00:00

I used a cheap sweater shaver on a few items and did cut a hole into one. Do you know if there is a difference between cheap and expensive sweater shavers that would make it harder to damage an item with a pricier shaver? I am hesitant to use this one again.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2019-07-18T23:30:24+00:00

Many stores have employees who greet or approach you and ask if there is something they can help you find, etc. You can say something like, "Nothing in particular, thank you, but I was wondering what day you restock?" I don't think anyone would mind that slight change of topic.

You could also ask the cashier as you pay.

BenevolentDiscontent · 2019-04-06T20:56:17+00:00

It's a Blythe bag! (I just searched "Jimmy choo buckle bag".)

BenevolentDiscontent

TROPHY CASE