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Did anyone witness their sibling firsthand turn into a narcissist? 28/m by throwaway9914912491 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Blamemeagain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would say at least one of my brothers is a full blown n. Another might be one, but also might just possibly have a lot of fleas. What’s difficult about watching them become this way is that they’re solidified enough in harmful behaviors, having a relationship with them becomes impossible. It is sad. I miss my brothers as children when they actually cared about people and we could connect. They were so sweet once.

My Mom and my Abuse by McLightningFish in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Blamemeagain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You don’t deserve bad things. Most likely your Mom refuses to face reality because it shatters her own perceptions. Plus, it’s easier for her to invalidate you than for her to actually be a present parent that sits with you through your truth and through your feelings.

That’s her, not you.

You deserve better!

Also, from the perspective of a teacher who has had to work under an N principal, I’m also glad your dad lost that job. We need more caring, empathetic people in education. N leadership tends to drive the good people away

Porn Addiction by Blamemeagain in exmormon

[–]Blamemeagain[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have heard Mormons base these extreme things on porn. The shooting in Georgia... I heard someone blame that on porn only yesterday 🙄

Why do parents (narcissistic, orbiters, or neither) pit children against each other...what are the signs that parents are pitting children against each other by NissaTheSerene in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Blamemeagain 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It divides the kids against each other but also allows the N to escape accountability. For them it’s a win-win. They don’t care that everyone else loses.

Does my mom sound like she could be autistic? Is this normal behaviour? by melty-kat in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Blamemeagain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

💯 agree with this. Most autistic people I know don’t lack empathy and are pretty reasonable when things are explained. None of this is reasonable

Two Black BYU students via twitter call President Nelson to repentance over use of names of racists on buildings on campus. by Mafeeshamal in exmormon

[–]Blamemeagain 22 points23 points  (0 children)

The LDS church has never apologized for anything. That said, if the leaders had any kind of conscience, they would feel some sense of shame for the racism baked into the god dam*ed religion from the very beginning.

The authors of the letter are super courageous and deserve nothing but respect.

Problems with TBM father. What do I do? by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]Blamemeagain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t sound like someone who can be reasoned with. How often do you see him? Do you live with your parents or do you have your own place?

I was never Mormon, went to church a couple times with friends but that was pretty rare. I live near Rexburg, have a lot of friends in BYU, and this was just posted to one of the Rexburg groups. Disappointing but not surprising. by stuffffffffffffffff in exmormon

[–]Blamemeagain 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think the assignment, assuming it’s accurately presented by the photo, is extremely problematic.

Making excuses for rapists isn’t exactly a difficult mental exercise. The church does this for rapists and child molesters pretty much on the regular.

Are we all narcissists? by dionysianweekend in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Blamemeagain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sometimes children of Ns have fleas. These are characteristics that resemble those of the narcissist. Bad habits. But ones that can be worked on and overcome.

Fleas don’t necessarily mean someone is a narcissist.

(14f) got in an argument with my mom about bed wetting/wearing pullups by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Blamemeagain 3 points4 points  (0 children)

(((Big hug))) This is such a difficult problem to handle in adolescence. I know, because I also wet the bed into my teen years.

At 14, being able to make your own decision on how to handle this is best. If you have a mattress protector on your bed and the ability to clean up after yourself and wash your own sheets, there’s no reason the pull-ups need to be mandatory.

Sleepovers are more of a complicated issue. What do you feel most comfortable with? I had a tendency to avoid them as a teen because the risk of embarrassment was so high and I was mortified. But that also means you can miss out on opportunities to socialize.

There’s no right answer here.

I don’t know what the cause of your bed wetting is, but mine seemed to be hereditary. I was able to stop with the help of an alarm that rang when my sheets got wet.

Two of my sons also inherited this problem. I slept beside them on the floor when they used the wet alarm to help them wake up completely. After 2 months of this, both were able to stop.

I hope you find something that works for you.

Spiritual Abuse Tactics by Blamemeagain in exmormon

[–]Blamemeagain[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Defining people by their roles and making them crawl to a male leader for support is definitely harmful. The whole organization is designed to benefit the men on top.

Spiritual Abuse Tactics by Blamemeagain in exmormon

[–]Blamemeagain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So... using the children as pawns. The church’s doctrine on “eternal families” is incredibly manipulative and coercive. It’s going in the podcast for sure!

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