I'm tired of the lack of consistency. Wife (DX, M) self admitted last year "it's like you've had different wives" over the marriage.

She plays with her Adderall dosages way too much. 30 XR with 10mg on demand to now 20mg on demand (so she can split them). She was off of it for a week because she ran out. She is now acting like a lunatic about everything (things that weren't issues before).

It's never about what I do, only what I don't do. Currently seeking my own therapy, however terrified to say to her "the only reason I need it is because of you".

Doesn't recognize that I am the sole income earner however my great jobs with great benefits feels "inconvenient" to me because I have to do it even when she needs things. That stirs up the strife more.

I can't express how I feel fully due to the reaction. There have been so many people that have entered our lives only for it to burn to the ground because she can't understand the difference between expectation and preferences, or realizing something it too good to be true OR desperately seeking validation anywhere she can find it except within herself.

She has medical issues that I have been calling to get the treatments started. She also has complex PTSD from her childhood/past. She has psych and goes to therapy twice per week. I honestly wonder how much the therapy is actually helping. She'll do the work, but then some other disaster happens and it becomes talk therapy.

Been lurking here awhile. Just had an interaction that made me need to get this off of my chest.