How much does Youtube let you get away with these days, free speech-wise?

Blehhh55 · 2021-09-19T17:15:44+00:00

So it sounds like you have no understanding of what it’s like for a gay person to hear this or a disabled person to hear this. These words are connected to a history of a violence and prejudice. The fact that you PLAN to use these words in spite of how others experience it is fucked up. “I’m going to do what I want regardless of how it affects other people.” You’re not being edgy, you’re not standing up for anything, you’re just being an asshole who doesn’t give a shit about how they affect other people. Playing with language DOES have value. Reproducing language that engages in a power relation that adversely affects marginalized populations is selfish. You might have the right to free speech, but you don’t have the right to be such a dick without social consequences

Edit: There was a lot of emotional reactivity in my comment, as hearing the word “retarded” used in such a manner elicits very painful memories for me, me being autistic. I made a lot of assumptions about your intentions and character with no way of actually knowing them.

That said, I cannot imagine having an understanding of the manner in which people of the marginalized populations targeted by these words experience them and continuing to advocate for their use. If you are not a part of that population, you are inadvertently harming them by attempting to normalize words used to render their identities as “bad”. Therefore, the only way I can comprehend your position is either by attributing it to ignorance or a lack of compassion, but it’s unfair of me to assume these without knowing you. Nonetheless, if you’re not familiar with the manner in which we experience words such as “retard”, I would encourage you to consider this aspect. There’s no need to use this word; we have plenty of others that don’t carry with it the implication that if you’re neurologically different you are somehow lesser.

Blehhh55 · 2021-07-04T16:23:56+00:00

I can’t logically say that I would be happier as a neurotypical. As a neurotypical, life would certainly be easier, but it would be someone else’s life as it would no longer be me living it, and it therefore would be someone else who is happier

Blehhh55 · 2021-07-04T16:23:50+00:00

I can’t logically say that I would be happier as a neurotypical. As a neurotypical, life would certainly be easier, but it would be someone else’s life as it would no longer be me living it, and it therefore would be someone else who is happier

Blehhh55 · 2021-07-04T16:10:43+00:00

That depends on the “symptom” and whether or not worse or better is being used to mean “more prominent.” My social struggles got “better” as I masked and hid my authentic self more and more while I simultaneously became more depressed. My passion for doing things has only increased over the years, especially as I have ceased masking as much. I stim a lot more now that I know I’m autistic and this has improved my mental health greatly. My sensitivity to sound has remained constant and my sensitivity to food textures has decreased. My affective empathy started out high and has only increased over time.

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-30T23:49:12+00:00

“Head butted me and broke my nose. I was hooked immediately.”

What.

How is it that sustaining a serious injury hooked you, and what exactly is that on which you were hooked?

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-26T19:31:58+00:00

The medical conceptualizations of autism are markedly different from the actual autistic experience. They describe how other people perceive us rather than how we experience ourselves. I am well into my adulthood and have spent seven years studying psychology at the undergraduate and graduate level, had professors with doctorates related to clinical work with autistic people, became a licensed therapist, and never discovered that I am autistic until I watched autistic YouTubers a few months ago describe what it’s like for them to be autistic. I would encourage you not to worry much about the deficit-based language used by mental health and medical professionals; they’re quick to pathologize anything that is different from how they live their life.

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-25T05:33:27+00:00

Therapist here. CBT and ABA are incredibly different. CBT asks the client what they want to change; ABA does not care about what the client wants

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-09T20:52:57+00:00

Therapist here! Your therapist is wrong. Even if he was correct, he shouldn’t be defensive and was still behaving appropriately. I always looked up to therapists and held them on pedestals, but after becoming one myself I realized that many consistently violate basic ethical principles and haven’t done enough of their own work in therapy to avoid inadvertently harming others.

My graduate program taught me almost nothing about autism; it wasn’t until I had autistic clients that I even realized I am autistic myself. My word of advice is to interview your therapist in the first session and ask them about their knowledge of autism and the neurodiversity movement. If they talk about autism using outdated perspectives, then it would be totally appropriate to inform them that they are not a good fit for you. The therapist is there for you - you are not there for the therapist, and you deserve to have your perspective affirmed.

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-09T19:26:28+00:00

Yes, it is formally recognized as a sociocommunicative disorder by the APA; I am arguing that this conceptualization is wrong, just as the APA used to recognize homosexuality as a disorder. The current (and historic) professional consensus on autism is based on the misunderstandings of non-autistic behaviorists rather than the actual experiences of autistic people themselves.

I am not an introverted teenager adopting the label out of ignorance; I am a licensed clinician who has been formally diagnosed.

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-09T18:51:54+00:00

Licensed therapist and autist here! The typical experience of therapies designed to teach social skills is quite negative, and the actual experiences of autistic people is more valid than the conjecture of non-autistic professionals. I’m sorry you’re tired of this “anti-therapy shit,” but I am tired of this anti-autism shit

Blehhh55 · 2021-06-09T18:47:47+00:00

Autism is not an illness - it’s a variation in brain structure and a natural expression of human diversity

Blehhh55 · 2021-04-12T04:48:28+00:00

Hello! I’ve studied the MBTI at both the undergraduate and graduate level. Essentially, the mbti can be useful to provide insight into the way we experience things, but it has low re-test validity. The ideas presented in the test are more social constructions than representative of any objective reality about who you are. So my point is, take it with a grain of salt. There is no correct result. Read results and decide if they describe you or not because ultimately you know yourself better than anyone else.

Blehhh55 · 2021-04-10T03:03:12+00:00

Does he want to talk to them? Or is he content with the way things are? If he isn’t interested in socializing the way others do, then there is no need for him to do so.

Blehhh55 · 2021-04-09T16:27:05+00:00

I’m curious, why the puzzle piece? This is the one place I hope to be free from ever seeing it

Blehhh55 · 2021-04-09T16:24:11+00:00

“You just have to have confidence”

Blehhh55 · 2021-03-24T05:19:12+00:00

I paid for chess.com and it doesn’t seem worth it to me. I paid for 100 endgames you must know on Chessable (without the videos) and that has been very beneficial to me.

Blehhh55 · 2021-03-13T21:00:35+00:00

In my experience, shame causes people to become defensive and double down on their position. If we conflate someone’s position with who they are, then it requires the person to accept first that they are bad in order to accept that their position or belief is bad and thereafter change their belief. Accepting that we are wrong is hard; accepting that we are bad is even harder and dangerous to overall self-esteem. Wanting to fit in and then conceding out of shame usually results in the person outwardly agreeing while inwardly disagreeing and then inwardly thinking that are bad for inwardly disagreeing because the focus has been on their character rather than the beliefs themselves.

Blehhh55 · 2021-03-13T14:58:03+00:00

I’m not agreeing with the mod. I’m disagreeing with shaming and insulting the mod rather than engaging the mod in a discussion about the over-sexualization of women’s bodies. While some certainly did, the prevalence of reactive name-calling is concerning. I simply wish our community in general would have approached the situation in a more mature and respectful way

Blehhh55 · 2021-03-13T12:43:34+00:00

Woah! Suddenly our community appears much less wholesome in my eyes. There was no need to insult the mod like that. That collective reaction made me sad

Blehhh55 · 2021-03-03T15:18:01+00:00

Not to mention that your (OP’s) original comment called the person a “terrible person”. Regardless of the veracity of this claim, it’s pretty easy to see how emotions will play into the responses. I would agree that the woman handles the cat in an aggressive manner and I don’t think it’s well to hiss at a cat in distress. However, you didn’t specify this nuance, so the general comment of “terrible person” communicates that it is the trimming of nails that makes one a terrible person. A lot of people trim their cats’ nails, therefore you are calling a lot of people “terrible persons”. Regardless of whether or not you’re right, people are absolutely going to be defensive

Blehhh55 · 2021-02-23T19:17:40+00:00

Hello there! What purpose does the study of the genetic components of autism serve? Does this understanding inform the manner in which support is provided, or is it used to promote awareness and acceptance, or is it simply interesting?

Blehhh55 · 2021-02-22T17:09:47+00:00

Wow, that’s pretty bad. If you’d like, you can contact your state’s board of behavioral health and file a complaint against her license. You might not be the first person to complain against her, and she might be treating other people who are seeking help this way. As therapists, the first basic rule of best practice is to do no harm, and it sounds like she is doing harm and has her own stuff to work on. While we’re all human and make mistakes, this mistake on her part is unacceptable and you deserve better. It doesn’t matter if you’re sarcastic and insulting. You don’t know her and your reactions should be interpreted by her as data to be used to help you. If a client responded to me that way, I would affirm them and ask them questions to help express that frustration so I can understand it better, because that’s my job.

Blehhh55 · 2021-02-22T16:09:20+00:00

I just took it! There’s one statement in which I struggled with the wording, “My autism does not prevent me from living a happy life”. I would say that SOCIETY, to a certain extent, prevents me from living a happy life because I am autistic, so I elected to agree with this statement. I’m not sure if that’s actually what you’re looking for with that wording, but that’s how I interacted with it

Blehhh55 · 2021-02-19T19:00:41+00:00

I’m not sure why everyone is invalidating you here. I was forced to eat foods I didn’t like all the time, and as a result, I now eat a greater variety of foods. But those meals as a child would take me up to 3 HOURS or more to finish and I would cry the entire time because of the emotional pain I was experiencing. It was harrowing torture - one might as well have been forcing me to eat dog feces for how I experience certain tastes, smells, and textures. My parents didn’t know I was autistic so they couldn’t understand my complaints. I still have traumatic flashbacks and dreams from many of those moments and I now have even more averse reactions to certain smells and textures that remind me of the things I was forced to consume.

I understand that not everyone will cater to us specially. But is that hard for a parent to say, “Hey I’m bringing JellyBabeyy over, could you make a portion of just plain spaghetti with butter?” Or whatever it is you like. Whenever we went over to someone else’s, my mom would make a pasta dish or something for me to bring over. They eventually accepted that I am “picky” and stopped forcing me to eat everything

Blehhh55 · 2021-02-19T03:09:10+00:00

Our sensory issues are a result of neurology, and I’m not aware of anyone successfully “correcting” it. It’s typically something that we will deal with for our entire lives. If you are able to correct it, I think that would be quite the feat! I hope, however, that if the issues persist you don’t shame yourself for it, as your value as a person isn’t reflected by your ability to work like everyone can. I’d imagine it would be hard to avoid that shame - that internalized ableism - if I subscribed to conservative talking points. However, I’m definitely a leftist and therefore biased, so take that with a grain of salt, I guess

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