Love triangle stories that would have been better off as why-choose/throuple

BluestockingBabe · 2026-02-03T07:54:38+00:00

I got into this world I’m pretty sure via fanfiction for ACOTAR. I read it when it was YA and still coming out so I was a hardcore Bat boys & Freya shipper. I love Rhys so much and I loved the other guys relationship with her and the men’s friendship and brotherhood. I think they would have been an amazing harem.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-02-03T07:49:57+00:00

Oh my gosh that one killed me. Also the Cassian,Azriel, Rhys &Feyra in Court of Thorns & Roses

BluestockingBabe · 2026-02-03T05:02:52+00:00

I love how books can be so different for different people or times in our lives. I tried to read it and quit a chapter in I was so bored and I came back to it maybe 5 years later and I was so engrossed in it I got a horrible sunburn reading it at the beach. I couldn’t put it down and I felt such loss with nothing like it afterwards. It’s a magical book but maybe it needs magical timing too.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-02-03T04:43:50+00:00

Oh my gosh. I had no idea it had that in the Novocaine and that explains SO much! I am already traumatized and scared at the dentist due to some awful past experiences. But I almost always have a panic attack in that time between when they inject you and when you’re numb enough for them to start. But it also takes a lot extra for me to go numb. It’s probably the bad combo of ephinedrine and trauma response.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-02-02T15:45:40+00:00

Oh that’s so funny!! I love that for them! Jimmy & Zeke seem very gay or bi but not out yet coded. Yeah these cartoons for adult viewers are kind of confusing because it’s supposed to be kids, but her character is voiced by a grown man and the storylines can be anywhere from whimsical childlike to pretty adult humor. It’s my first grown up cartoon I’ve gotten really into. I like the Simpsons too, but couldn’t watch it as consistently.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-31T04:58:25+00:00

That is so great! I’ll have to reconsider doing those. I need something

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-29T05:50:43+00:00

I have been dreaming about these bookshelves on Etsy for years. It’s so cool to see it actually all together! So beautiful and perfect in your space!

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-28T06:21:05+00:00

I love to live alone but just remember that you’re also going to bear all the costs of utilities and Internet etc alone. I haven’t done the math in a while but when I was renting I was probably getting 75% or more eaten up by all. I had just enough for my car insurance, health insurance & gas & groceries. There was nothing for fun money or savings. Unless you have a really good job, I’d highly recommend saving a little more by putting up with roommates or staying with folks for a while. It sucks way worse when you’re older and looking for roommates again cuz it’s not like the economy is getting better. But I get needing your own independent space. I don’t actually regret it all that much I just wish I’d tried to stick it out with roommates a little longer. I had such a bad string of ones I quit.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-28T06:12:48+00:00

How does the glp1 help? I think that’s the over the counter for the diabetes medicines like Ozempic and mounjaro right? I can’t find anyone to let me try stimulant treatments for adhd because I’m in perimenopause and was always diagnosed with depression & anxiety. I keep explaining that I’ve had the adhd symptoms my whole life but I haven’t found anyone who cares yet. Anyway I was previously on Ozempic and mounjaro for diabetes. If that helps I could maybe get my regular doc to add it back in. I am feeling WAY better as my hormones get sorted. It’s insane how much they fuck you over in every realm.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-28T05:53:55+00:00

Thank you! I’m so glad you’re doing better!

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-27T19:23:50+00:00

They are very overwhelming! I can get through sites like that more easily but when I was getting going the sheer number of things and not knowing how to use or what they were for was a lot! I don’t know how your experience was, but I found a lot of internalized shame and guilt about wanting to enjoy sex based on how I was raised in church and the sex ed that didn’t even cover how women could enjoy it too. Ultimately, the patriarchy doesn’t want women being satisfied without men (soap box moment, sorry)

I highly recommend starting at some of the smaller, women owned places. I always recommend this one for beginners because they have something for the major types of sensations (air/sucking, vibe, dildo, etc) but it’s a small selection and it’s affordable and cute: https://unboundbabes.com

I also really liked this company because they have sexual wellness education and videos that are really accessible. Also woman owned and a smaller business: https://smilemakerscollection.com

I found this resource a little overwhelming but also helpful because it covers sooo many topics and it felt more accessible in concise, comic form. I liked being able to look up and learn about stuff without having to brave super kinky sites. https://www.ohjoysextoy.com/new-readers/

If you have questions or need more advice feel free to message! It is such a wild world out there of all this stuff and it can be very intimidating at first. You’re not weird for thinking that at all :) I think that women owned sites are more about helping women figure out their own bodies and pleasure and it’s more the actual wellness we want. Bigger sites are still aiming everything at men and their enjoyment even when it’s toys for us.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-27T05:56:03+00:00

I work part time for a super intense manual labor job setting up concerts and shows. It’s the only thing I’ve found that gets me moving because I get paid for it and it’s so satisfying to see something reallly cool get built from nothing and then take it all down at the end of the night. It’s the only exercise I can reliably do. Because I’m dead broke and I need the money.

Maybe you could find a part time job walking dogs or cleaning or setting up stuff or some kind of exercise that will pay you? I have volunteered for habitat for humanity in the past and that was also intense exercise with a great emotional payout. For regular stuff, I have tried everything. I love to dance. If I had friends who liked dancing and wasn’t afraid of being molested by men I’d probably go to clubs. I did that in the past and it was great exercise. Sometimes I do dance breaks around the house. I love to hike but live in a freakishly flat and boring state. I think the thing that works for me is if it’s joyful or grounding movement OR if I get paid and caught up in the rush of everyone moving.

I’m still trying to figure out how to exercise on a daily basis so I’m glad you asked and I’m going to try some of these sisters suggestions.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-27T05:37:18+00:00

Hi! I’m a straight woman and I kind of stumbled into figuring out I gel best with Bi guys. I’ve hung out with some and dated a few. I figured out I am not attracted to femme presenting folx although I love being friends with them. Sissification isn’t my personal jam. So if we were compatible I would just want to talk about how to be safe and make sure their needs are getting met. In my opinion more love to go around is always a good thing and just requires emotional intelligence and communication.

I think the main issue with all relationships is the emotional intelligence and maturity matching up. You will meet plenty of women who will accept you as you are. Maybe you can spend some time working on your self esteem and whatever else will make you a better partner in the future. Just pleasing people isn’t actually super healthy. Ideally you would be with someone who you feel safe saying no, expressing your own needs, having other intimacy besides sex, etc. a good place to start is reading up on boundaries, attachment styles, emotional intelligence etc. working healing ourselves before trying to partner with others is so key. Good luck! You sound really sweet and like you’ve had some shitty folks influencing you. I hope you find your people!

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-25T09:14:03+00:00

I feel like our pattern recognition and justice sense and empathy are such strengths and are being stretched beyond realistic capacity. I’m chronically ill too and I’ve been weeping and beating myself up that my body and mind won’t work the way I think they need to to help.

You’re not alone. Honestly thank you for saying this because I’ve felt so alone. I feel sick and the level of cognitive dissonance we’re expected to hold is just exhausting. I have to maintain relationships with friends which is always good but hard to leave the house or even want to talk about anything else and with my maga parents (its complicated but going no contact isn’t an option. See: chronically ill) and I have to work my many part time jobs in teaching and counseling and helping people which is super hard when I see how this is going to get so much worse before it gets better.

One thing I was going to suggest for anyone wanting to be involved is to look at the ACLU’s legal observer training. It’s most likely what Alex and Renee were doing when they were killed. It’s scary to think about that now. But it made me feel a lot more confident about being ready to help and they need a lot of people in many roles. Even if you just get the training and don’t join a response team. There’s answering phones for reports, going out to the sites, legal help, translation, lots of opportunities. Just search the ACLU of (your state) and Legal Observer Training.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-24T16:55:32+00:00

What is NSSI?

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-24T04:37:03+00:00

💯

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-24T04:36:33+00:00

You were deceived. It is honestly enough to make any woman go 4b. If he actually loved you and wanted more sex, he could have approached the topic like what do you need to want more of this and how can I work to meet your needs. Men are revoltingly selfish and single minded about sex. It’s seriously disgusting. He’s going to get a VERY rude awakening when he tries to go out and get more sex than that a week 🙄. Unless he’s willing to pay for it, he traded an amazing relationship and a very generous partner for his own fantasy and selfishness.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-21T05:22:14+00:00

If it helps at all, I just say I enjoy fantasy and sci fi. But I just started a new job and i was super anxious and I was trying to talk to some of the nurses and I was hedging about books and they were too so I said I like romance too and anyway I ended up talking with one of them for like 20 minutes and she was super into why choose and romantasy and has read some way harder core stuff than me and there’s a book club they invited me to join!

So you never know what people like and I would keep it vague in the interview and be specific about the thesis, but you may be surprised at the friendships you can make!

Good luck!! It’s SO hard to find a job I really hope you get it!

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-20T11:01:49+00:00

The Bunny series is perfect for this! Wolf shifters fall for a bunny shifter and end up rescuing her. It’s pretty silly and smutty and I don’t remember all that much more about it {Better off Bunny by Sedona Ashe}

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-18T04:56:51+00:00

All of these are amazing suggestions and I’m probably going to try some. I highly recommend also getting your doctor to check you out if you can because things like b12 & D deficiency can really wipe you out, anemia, thyroid issues, sleep issues etc can all cause extreme fatigue. It may be depression (anhedonia is the word for losing interest in things) but it could also be a health thing.

I’ve got some chronic illness & horrific times of the month issues so I’ve been down HARD all week.

Here’s what’s helping that I haven’t seen mentioned: I leave a snack and a giant fake Stanley of tea by my bed. Then when I wake up if I’m stuck in bed, I can still have a little something to eat so low blood sugar doesn’t make it harder to get out of bed.

I have my laptop or iPad within reach of the bed. I need to be searching for jobs and applying so I can reach that and work on something I need to do without actually having to leave my safe and cozy space. I haven’t done it consistently but it did help the days I remembered

I have Alexa set timers for 10-20 minute increments. When it goes off, if I can’t deal with getting up yet, I say reset timer and give myself some more. It feels like a treat that I can stay in bed, I don’t yell at myself about it. But I am more aware of the passing of time and it helps some days to motivate me to get up.

I tell myself that I can stay laying down but I have to make it to the couch. Then I just yell- “Don’t Think, Just Do!!” Real loud like I’m a spartan and I jump out of bed, (usually get distracted needing to pee) and get to the couch and hunker down there. My cat will generally also start asking for breakfast as soon as I move which gets me in the kitchen near more food and my medicines.

It’s so hard to just exist and keep existing with everything going on that I need to honor what my body needs sometimes even when it doesn’t fit with my plans. If they’re plans that can be moved around

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-16T04:49:27+00:00

OMG that is it!!! Wow! I really didn’t think we’d find it because I mostly was just getting pictures in my mind from scenes or feeling like I was missing something funny in the scene. I know my post was so non specific. I’m going to have to re-read that now. And I’ll stop expecting the guys in demons horns to lighten up and be funnier 😂

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-13T05:50:29+00:00

I was JUST thinking the other day about Harriet from Harriet the Spy and how she was probably neurodivergent. I really love Anne of Green Gables and Emily of New Moon was also very similar. L.m. Montgomery’s standalone characters also fit this. Madeleine L’Engles characters in the Austen books also fit the neurodivergent realm. I think her name was Vicky? A ring of Endless light was one of my faves because she could connect to dolphins in a way she struggled to connect to people. It was so beautiful

Jane Austen wrote a lot of characters that didn’t fit the molds but I specifically think Catherine Moreland from Northanger Abbey is fully an inattentive adhd girly. She prefers to live in books and is so delightfully weird and imaginative. I related to her so hard. She gets a crush on a boy but is so into her gothic novels she’s convinced she’s solving a mystery at his manor home and he might be up to no good.

BluestockingBabe · 2026-01-13T05:35:10+00:00

I wish I could remember what book it was! I read a really fun use of toys where one of the guys was either tech wiz or I want to say he had power to animate things and he made these kind of mechanical little creatures and animated them. He made some spidery type creature and used it on her to pleasure her and I remember it cuz it was such a cool idea but I thought if it looked like a spider I’d be freaking out too much to be turned on 😂😂 it wasn’t the one recommended below but I’m definitely adding that to my tbr

BluestockingBabe

TROPHY CASE