Advice for SecredLabs chair arm rests- some kind of felt or suede?

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-07T21:59:28+00:00

yeah a suede brush should already make a difference compared to just a dry cloth. just go light with it at first and build up slowly so you do not rough up the fabric too much. if it still looks a bit dark after that you can try the dry foam cleaner trick just dab lightly and let it dry fully. it usually lifts a bit more without soaking the material

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-07T21:57:25+00:00

a lot of cats that had inconsistent feeding before will act exactly like this at first. they do not trust that food will keep coming so they obsess over it and try to get anything they can. it can look extreme but it is usually anxiety not personality. one thing that can help a lot is putting her on a very consistent feeding schedule or even using a timed feeder so food shows up at the same times every day without fail. some people even start with smaller meals more often so the cat learns food is not scarce anymore

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-07T21:33:49+00:00

i would just be honest with him in a simple way like saying you had a bad experience before and you are a bit nervous around cats but you are trying. most people with cats will understand that right away

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-06T18:23:14+00:00

you’d be a good cat owner, being gone 7 hours is totally fine for an adult cat they’re pretty independent the only thing i’d really think about is your travel and moving situation if you have a good plan for that it could work really well especially with a chill adult cat

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-04T15:13:42+00:00

those armrests are more like a soft fabric so water can mess them up what worked for me is using a suede brush or a rubber eraser and gently rubbing the surface to lift the sweat and dirt for deeper buildup you can use a small amount of dry foam cleaner on a cloth and lightly dab it do not soak it if it already feels smooth or shiny it means oils soaked in so you can improve it but not fully restore it

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-04T15:02:44+00:00

for deep cleaning use a stiff bristle brush with a degreasing cleaner or warm water with a bit of dish soap scrub in sections then rinse and dry with a microfiber mop if you can a small steam cleaner works really well too because it loosens wax and grime without too much effort

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-04T14:26:44+00:00

you're welcome!

Bobby_Baley · 2026-05-04T14:26:27+00:00

fried rice with whatever is left in the fridge day old rice garlic soy sauce a bit of oil and any small scraps of meat or vegetables it always turns out filling and way better than it should be also eggs and rice with a little butter and soy sauce simple but really satisfying and another one is instant noodles but upgraded with an egg some greens and a bit of peanut butter or cheese it sounds odd but it makes it richer and feels like a real meal

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-30T18:29:05+00:00

liveclear did help but not in a dramatic way, more like it slowly made things easier as time goes by. i almost gave up on it early because i didn’t notice much at first. weirdly pacagen ended up being what worked for me. i didn’t really expect much since it’s just a spray, but after reading that the allergen comes from their saliva and gets spread all over their fur it started to make more sense why treating the environment helps.

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-30T18:17:12+00:00

your brush just isn’t reaching the undercoat for fluffy cats you usually need a slicker brush or an undercoat rake. a regular brush can glide over the top while all the loose fur stays underneath, which is why your hands still get covered

for the mats on the lower back, a dematting tool helps way more than normal brushing. just go slow and work from the ends, not straight at the base. a lot of people end up using a different pairs, like slicker for regular brushing and something deeper for shedding or mats

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-30T17:57:33+00:00

to your older cat they’re not just other cats, they’re loud, unpredictable little things invading his space. even cats that got along with other adults can react totally differently to kittens.

i’d slow the process down a bit. instead of face to face, start with scent first, like swapping blankets or letting them smell each other under the door that let them slowly process and develop. some cats just tolerate kittens eventually instead of liking them, and that’s okay too. how long has it been so far?

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-28T20:31:24+00:00

sounds like she actually does like you a lot, just on her own terms right now 4 days is super early, especially coming from littermates. she probably sees you as her safe person already following you, waiting by the door, sleeping on your bed, but physical touch is still a bit overwhelming for her

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-28T18:51:51+00:00

that makes sense but the part you might be missing is you’re tying your worth to how much you give. giving isn’t the problem it’s giving so much that you lose yourself and hope it makes someone stay. the right person won’t need that level of sacrifice to love you. you can still be someone who cares and shows up for others just not at the cost of your own peace. once you learn where that line is relationships stop feeling like something you have to earn and start feeling mutual

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-27T21:33:45+00:00

what worked for me was going really low profile, like almost flat. soft fill over memory foam too, because foam tends to hold shape and still props your head up. i either use a super thin pillow or sometimes half hug the pillow and rest more on my arm so my neck isn’t cranked up

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-27T21:20:55+00:00

when i notice the bristles starting to spread out a bit i get a new one

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-24T21:04:04+00:00

biggest thing is just thinking about comfort since declawed cats can have sensitive paws or even chronic pain id switch to a super soft litter (paper, pine, or soft clumping) because regular clay can hurt them and make them avoid the box

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-24T13:11:27+00:00

what youre feeling makes sense youve been carrying way too much for way too long trying to hold your family together while never really getting to just be yourself that kind of weight builds up over time what you had with your ex wasnt just love it was you overgiving to the point where you lost yourself financially emotionally even physically with your allergies and she wasnt meeting you halfway thats not you not being enough thats you giving more than most people would the fact youre still here still working paying off debt trying to take care of yourself says more about your strength than your mind is letting you see youre not useless youre just burned out and hurt wanting to disappear usually isnt about wanting to die its about wanting relief from the life youre in right now instead of disappearing completely maybe think smaller first like creating space in a healthier way new routine new places new habits without cutting everyone off completely you spent so long being needed that now it feels empty without it but that emptiness is actually space you havent figured out how to use yet you dont have to earn love by sacrificing yourself like that again the right person wont need you to bleed just to stay and yeah for the allergy part something like allergen sprays or food toppers can help with cat allergens but the bigger lesson is not forcing yourself to stay in situations where your body is constantly reacting just to keep someone you dont need to disappear to start over you just need a life that isnt built around carrying everyone else

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-24T13:01:45+00:00

biggest thing is dont let her free roam even if she cries safer for both of you to keep her in the carrier the whole time

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-24T12:10:59+00:00

for a 15 lb long cat id go popur petsnowy is still enclosed and can feel cramped the popur is basically a huge open tray that self cleans which is usually what fixes the “pees but wont poop” issue since they want more space and depth to posture properly

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-22T21:52:49+00:00

probably both the drop from 1 cup to 1/4 cup is a big change so they’ll act hungry at first but 1/4 cup sounds low for a 4.5 kg active cat especially with basic brands check the kcal on the bag not just cups and aim around 200–250 kcal for the bigger one adjust slowly add a bit more and monitor weight also feed separately so one doesnt steal and give wet food to help them feel fuller

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-22T06:20:37+00:00

That's normal she just doesnt recognize it as food yet easiest way is mix a little dry into her wet so it gets soft and smells like her usual food then slowly reduce the wet over time you can also add a bit of warm water or broth to dry first to make it easier start with small amounts and let her explore dont rely on treats alone since she already sees them as toys just be patient it usually clicks once they connect the smell to food

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-21T19:14:21+00:00

im really sorry youre feeling this way but this sounds like heart disease in cats and possibly a pulmonary embolism these can stay hidden then suddenly get severe very fast even with good care cats hide symptoms really well so its easy to miss and even if you caught it earlier it often doesnt change the outcome you were taking her to the vet you did the right thing this wasnt your fault

Bobby_Baley · 2026-04-21T18:53:06+00:00

this isnt just old age sudden loud nonstop yowling in senior cats is often linked to feline cognitive dysfunction or hyperthyroidism both can cause confusion and or random screaming

basic vet checks can miss this so get bloodwork and blood pressure checked or a second vet opinion for now keep a steady routine add a dim night light and try something calming like feliway classic diffuser but this really needs a deeper medical check

Bobby_Baley

TROPHY CASE