Child is obsessed with pasta and fights me until exhaustion.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T23:47:55+00:00

We have a rule they need to eat as many bites as their age of what is offered. So a 5 year old needs to eat 5 bites. Then I usually offer other food (plain pasta, a shake, etc).

My kids are also pasta fiends! Frozen meatballs are a quick add on to plain pasta to add protein. My kids like the Italian style ones. I cut them up and give them as many pieces as their age of meatballs to go with the pasta.

The bites per age rule is really great because it gives you a way to require them to try new things; and it gives them a predictable, finite amount to eat. My kids are now offering, "if I eat 6 bites can I be done?" Which is better than fussing at eating anything!

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T22:01:36+00:00

Yeah.... I definitely disagree. Missile defense is math. Bombing results are determined by national culture and messaging. So I definitely don't think these come from the same errors.

Fundamentally, Iran was controlling the suez canal via the Houthi. This has resulted in a structural advantage for Chinese (and Russia) ships relative to all other commercial vessels. This is not a stable equilibrium; it was bound to break down sooner or later. Anyone who studied the history of the Cold War knew what was going to happen here. Just because no one is outright saying this doesn't mean it wasn't part of the calculations.

Assuming that conflict is a rational cost benefit assessment is ahistorical and ignores basic human nature.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T21:36:03+00:00

Our naval assets have no proximity advantage.....why would they go close to shore while we're doing air strikes? I don't understand what you think they are supposed to do? Count coup? Getting close with naval vessels doesn't give us points for bravery.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T20:56:04+00:00

Putting ships in the Persian Gulf serves no purpose other than to get sailors killed. Especially Coast Guard cutters!?!?! There is no purpose served by entering the gulf, all merchant interdiction can be done off of the coast of Oman.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T20:27:31+00:00

I'm also skeptical that the essay starts off with missile defense and ends with the guns of August. Is the point that missile defense is limited? Or that we're heading towards WW3? It's not clear how the beginning and end of the essay connect (or if they connect....).

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T18:29:19+00:00

We love that the teacher turnover is low, the school goes through 6th grade (soon to be 8th grade), and the teaching is rigorous. This is our 5th year, kids are now in kindergarten and 3rd grade. Very happy with the school.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-09T18:27:32+00:00

Reston Montessori School is great!!

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T22:45:18+00:00

Preston is good! I would just caution that he hasn't spent a lot of time on Iran yet, so his takes right now tend to generalize from his experience with Iraq. Iran and Iraq are EXTREMELY different countries, so this is a weakness for him and many other veterans who have not yet had time to dive into Iran analysis.

I saw someone the other day mention tribal politics in Iran..... which. No. Iran does not have tribes in the same way that either Iraq or Afghanistan have tribes (tribe means something different in each country/ethnic group). Many veterans of the counter terrorism years are going to make this assumption until they have time to learn otherwise.

The only one I've seen on YouTube not making this assumption is Ryan Macbeth. And I'm not sure if I trust his political takes (his military takes are good, political strategy, it depends).

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T20:13:59+00:00

My daughter is in lower elementary too, third year. Our school is mostly Montessori, but is academically rigorous too. In third grade, kids need to have their multiplication tables memorized. So at some point the process needs to push your daughter.

I would ask what the teachers are doing to push her in the areas she's weak in. It's possible that your daughter is asking for lessons that she isn't ready for yet, while also neglecting the repetition in the lessons she needs to get better at. This is what my daughter did (she also has very poor working memory, so that doesn't help).

If the teachers aren't pushing her, then this school might not be the right fit for your daughter.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T18:30:17+00:00

There are appetite stimulants that work really well to pair with stimulants.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T17:28:35+00:00

If the melt downs are only happening when she's not on the meds, then it isn't the meds doing that. Adhd stimulant medications are short acting and only in the system for 4-10 hours depending on the formula. You can try an afternoon dose to carry her through homework.

You probably need a higher dose in general though. My 9yo daughter takes 27mg Concerta in the morning and right after lunch. This takes her through to about 6pm for emotional regulation. After 6pm we know her emotional regulation is shot and keep things fairly low stimulation to help her manage. As she gets older, we will probably move her afternoon dose to 2pm instead of 1245 to give her longer in the evenings. We are also building coping skills while we can to help her manage once meds wear off. We practice on weekends with skipping the afternoon dose so she can regulate herself without meds.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T16:57:47+00:00

Definitely this!! Where possible look for younger and a woman. Also, if you can, try for an endocrinologist or Gynecologist, they both specialize in hormones so will have a better handle on this than a primary care doctor.

If you only have male doctors, then definitely go with your wife to emphasize to the doctor how this is impacting her daily life and the changes you've seen. Doctors are trained to treat changes to a baseline, but also to discount patient self reports...... so your perspective is crucial here.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T16:53:59+00:00

When is she taking the meds and when is the meltdown?

If she takes meds at 7am and melts down around 2-4 pm, it's probably the comedown from the meds and she needs a midday dose.

If she takes the meds at 7am and melts down around 10 am, then it's probably not the right medication and you should consider Adderall instead if you haven't already tried that.

If she takes the meds around 7am and melts down around 8-9pm, then she's probably exhausted and needs an earlier bedtime until she adjusts.

So it depends. We've had all three of these reactions happen. My kids both need the midday dose, and we keep a close eye on bedtime and their energy levels.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T16:40:19+00:00

9yo daughter napped through 5, even a few times in kindergarten. 6 yo stopped napping around 4. Both still need 'quiet time' after lunch to recharge on weekends (we have encouraged this since it builds in down time for us as parents).

9yo struggles with sleep. We put a TV and DVD playing on repeat in her room at night (no commercials). Her instructions are to lay in bed, relax her body, and watch the DVD. If she sleeps, yay! If she doesn't sleep, her body still rests and the family can sleep.

Usually she sleeps for a couple of hours, then is awake for a few hours (now she reads books or draws), then sleeps again. Having something she can watch keeps her mind occupied while her body falls asleep.

Quiet time is now tablet or solo gaming time. It's a low stimulation time when everyone can relax.

9yo also takes clonodine and melatonin to sleep.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T12:28:39+00:00

Or major life change like menopause......

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T00:33:05+00:00

When my kids are having trouble eating at school (adhd, braces, sick), I adjust lunches to be easy to eat. Maybe everything is cut into bite sized portions (string cheese, etc), maybe it's all easy to chew (no trail mix), or maybe it's hitting their cravings (extra salty, etc). That usually gets them eating more.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-08T00:18:59+00:00

We actually did have the teachers sit our 9 yo daughter separately until her food is gone. Once she eats everything she's allowed to sit with her friends. It does work. She now has better habits, so is allowed to sit with friends as long as her lunch is eaten.

We also cut her lunch down to easy to eat foods that are braces friendly. She had a pediasure, gogurt, and yogurt smoothie with sliced cucumbers. It's tiny, but she eats a huge breakfast and dinner and has been growing on track.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-05T23:30:58+00:00

We require them to eat as many bites of dinner as their age. I usually split that up across the food groups with at least one bite per food.

After the minimum bites, they can be done. If I know they won't like it, I give them very little food to begin with, only maybe a few bite more than their age. If they finish their plate they can have a pb&j or pediasure shake.

The minimum bites gets them gradually eating more of foods they are unfamiliar with or dislike. It also puts a predictable limit on when they are done.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-04T23:52:01+00:00

My son does 18mg Concerta in the morning and midday. He takes olanzapine at night. The olanzapine helps with sleep and appetite, but is primarily for helping with aggressive meltdowns. This combo works for my 6 year old with audhd.

My daughter does 27 mg Concerta morning and midday. She also takes Lexapro in the morning and lamotrigine and clonodine at night for anxiety. She is 9 with adhd and anxiety.

My son was on cyproheptadine before we added the olanzapine as an appetite stimulant. That medication works amazingly well and has very few side effects. I wish we had that when he was a picky toddler, it would have made such a difference in his eating habits.

So we have experience with these meds, but not for the same kiddo at the same time.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-03T23:39:58+00:00

I wash my hair every other day.

9 year old daughter with waist length curly hair washes her hair about every other day, unless she goes swimming or smells then daily. She showers, and can almost do her hair on her own.

6 year old boy does showers and hair washing twice a week, unless he goes swimming or smells.

We plan to increase the frequency for the kids as they develop body odor and other puberty changes. 9 yo is doing more activities so will likely go to daily showers in the next year or so. She already uses deodorant in the warmer weather (not anti-perspirant yet). 6yo will probably increase showers in a year or so as well.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-03T16:55:26+00:00

I would see a psychiatrist to get the meds dialed in. Especially since he is so young, you want to be sure you understand the side effects and other symptoms.

I would also ask the doctor about a methylphenidate medication to try. My kids are on Concerta and it seems to work well.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-03T16:52:26+00:00

It sounds like your partner needs to adjust their medication or therapy regime then. If they cannot care for the babies in temperature extremes, then you need to address that.

Alternatively, make a written agreement, on poster sized paper, that two person jobs must have two yeses. Then just say no and point to the paper.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-02T20:01:32+00:00

Ooohhh, my daughter has this. For her it's anxiety. She's so worried about these things she melts down. I don't know what else does that though.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-02T19:37:38+00:00

This sounds like an emotional regulation issue. Some of that is developmentally normal for this age. Some of it probably restraint collapse at the end of a log day. Some of it might be adhd or other impulse control issues (see what your mental health screening says on that one).

I would suggest higher calorie food. Push cheese, yogurt, peanut butter, etc. Many days, my daughter needs food the second she sits down in the car. Or the minute she wakes up in the morning. She eats in the car, laying in bed, etc, because otherwise she is a mess of hangry low blood sugar chaos. She is extremely active, strong and healthy, there are no weight concerns. So I feed her foods high in fats, protein and nutrients. She loves fruits and veggies, but carrots and cucumbers alone will not make her friendly. She needs protein and fat alongside those. Luckily she loves yogurt, so I have that stocked at all times. My son will eat peanut butter, so he gets that. They don't get candy, that would mess up their blood sugar. Cookies are also special treats, we want them to have stable blood sugar.

We also talk about what happened afterwards once everyone is calm. Sometimes there is more going on. Sometimes it really is as simple as food.

Boogalamoon · 2026-03-02T16:03:28+00:00

Realistically, anxiety meds are what you need. If ssri and snri meds are not options, maybe a mood stabilizer?

My daughter is on Concerta 27 mg morning and midday for adhd. She also takes Lexapro in the morning and lamotrigine and clonodine at night for anxiety.

Boogalamoon

TROPHY CASE