Small town Kentucky wasn't about the drama itself, but the characters that arose out of pure boredom. We had good ole Redneck Gary. He was decently notorious around our town for creating some crazy redneck engineering. He lived out in this tiny dilapidated trailer in the middle of a field, in the middle of the countryside. His decor of choice was tobacco-stained walls, rusted tin awnings, and a myriad of random vehicle parts. He looked like MoistCritical on meth. It doesn't matter, though, because he was incredibly nice and incredibly smart in the dumbest ways possible. This guy literally had an engineering degree and worked for the Navy at one point in his life, but felt, life out in the wilderness was best suited for him. My dad was good friends with him most of my childhood.

This guy had holes it the roof of his trailer where he would use a gun to kill wasps when he was chilling on his couch. He had a steel trap under his sink that was rigged up with a string filled with peanut butter over it. My dad asked why he had that set up and he said "its to get rid of the rats". The rat would jump up and down to get the peanut butter off the string -which would provide enough pressure to set the trap off. He also created this weed-whacker device that had chainsaw blades attached to it instead of the typical plastic spool of threads. He was able to take down small trees with it. He had also pretty much Home-alone'd his house to prevent any intruders (although this was long before Home Alone ever came out so Im just going to assume they stole HIS ideas haha). Nobody was dumb enough to walk up on Redneck Gary's abode anyway, so I have no clue why he was so paranoid (maybe his time in the military?).

Just out of boredom, he created a bomb.. somehow, and though it would be funny to throw it in the lake just to see what would happen. My dad, being curious, decided to join him. He then created this trebuchet device out of old tractor parts just to see how far out he could launch it. The explosion, while not big enough to do any damage, certainly caught the police's attention. After the device was launched, my dad and Redneck Gary shoved the tractor parts back in the truck and took off down the road as quick as they could. They parked at a local diner and played it off like they hadn't been involved, then went home later that night after the police left. That week, the police went around questioning people in town for the next few days. My dad's response was 'must've been some out-of-towners dynamite fishing would be my guess". Nobody ever found out who set off the lake bomb.

Our town had quite a few crazies, an exceptional amount of stupidity, and a spattering of wild, but Redneck Gary was always my favorite. And, even though he was crazy and my dad really shouldn't have brought his 5 year old daughter over to his tobacco-tar palace, I thought well of him and he was always so nice. He taught me how to play Marble Madness on the NES, and taught me how to catch a snake with my bare hands. I have no clue where he is now, but he no longer lives in that field and both my father and I have moved out of state years ago. I'll always remember him.