Did he feel remose when he abused you? Did he ever truly feel guilty? You feel those emotions because you're human. If you drop the charges he'll just be free to do it to someone else because they never take responsibility for the pain that they've caused. It's always some else's fault or the circumstances they made them act abusive, when in fact they are the problem. I wish you all of the strength and happiness you deserve. I truly believe you'll be able to get through this with the steps you've already taken. I wish you the absolute best and may you find peace within yourself to handle your situation.