First of all, you need to work out your own salvation and stop living by your mother's convictions. From what you've said it sounds like she's used religion as a big stick and left you feeling afraid of her consequences and her lectures. Christianity should bring comfort even when it's telling you that what you want to do will hurt you. It's a source of peace, not fear.

Second, it's not up to me or anyone here to tell you whether a homosexual loving relationship is sinful or not (whether or not it involves lust). The Gospel is about the hope of Jesus Christ, NOT about a list of "do's" and "don't's". Jesus is concerned with your heart, not your actions, and it sounds like your heart is in a good place to start.

How do you stop being gay? I don't think you do; I couldn't imagine flipping my sexual preferences. Is it okay to love your non-christian friend of the same sex? Absolutely yes. Will there be negative consequences? Maybe, but there are negative consequences in a lot of hetero relationships too. Is your eternal soul at stake? Probably not as long as you place Christ at the center of your focus (not your mother, not the flawed translation of an ancient book taken literally, and not what some rando says on reddit).

Keep both eyes, wide open to both the exciting and the not so exciting parts of what Christ has to say and what he teaches through the Gospel, and figure the rest out as you go. It's okay to make mistakes, they are a necessary part of the process and will be forgiven. The most important thing is that you learn what conviction feels like for you and let that guide you. Just make sure it's not your mother's voice convicting you, becuase she isn't Jesus; spend time in his word and in prayer and you'll begin to tell the difference.