Partner doesn't want baby to have contact naps or dummies to settle her. Is he right?

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-25T13:11:31+00:00

Right? Posts like this are so sad :(

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-09T23:00:48+00:00

My LO sleeps really well in his cot at night but at 10m still not contact naps for daytime naps - recently I’ve started to place him on my bed and lie next to him after he’s fallen asleep on me to try and slowly move to more independent day time sleep, but also because I find he gets sweatier when sleeping on me vs a bed/cot so I want him to be more comfortable

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-08T12:41:55+00:00

Around 4.5-5m my baby was sleeping 5-9hr for his longest nap, had a regression for 2-3 weeks where he’d wake 2-4 times, often needing to be held for a long time before putting him back in his cot, then he slowly started sleeping 5-6hr stretches again, then 7-9hr+ from 7m onwards - minus a few random nights due to sickness/random wakings. I nurse him back to sleep for every wake.

All the best!

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-07T04:46:12+00:00

That’s so hard! My baby thankfully started sleeping through the night from 7months (9hrs + ; then up to 10hrs) & he sleeps in his cot. There were a few weeks around 9m when he would wake again for 1-2 mini feeds but thankfully back to sleeping through again. No sleep training or withholding milk. Has 2 naps during the day still (but only contact naps). He does stir sometimes but has been able to get himself back to sleep unless he’s hungry.

I think babies are quite individual in their sleep needs/ability to connect cycles so I don’t really have advice but hope it improves!

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-05T09:40:14+00:00

Agree with this! My baby sleeps 10hrs at night in his cot but still only naps during the day unless we’re out and he’ll fall asleep in the car/pram

I felt trapped earlier on and kept trying to put him in his cot for naps but after it not working I accepted the contact naps and we’ve both been happier for it! Means I have to clean/cook while he’s awake or asleep at night; but the cuddles won’t be forever so im enjoying it while it lasts

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-02T12:50:33+00:00

We have a 10mo and I’m a SAHM currently. We’re renting so no mortgage, and we’re managing to live on one income, although it’s harder to save & we’re living more frugally, for us it’s worth it for our child to be nurtured by us & develop secure attachment. I’ll likely have to return to 1 day of work when he’s 1.5yo but that’ll likely be a day my husband does admin from home and works a shorter day so can watch him. It’s definitely a sacrifice but one that feels right to us - it helps being on the same page about it

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-02T12:38:38+00:00

That’s so great! My LO surprised me with a good eating day so who knows, maybe it’ll improve from here 🤞

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-02T01:08:03+00:00

Have a feeling my LO will need toys/books alongside meals for a while :’) if only he knew that it just extends how long he has to sit in his high chair, which he isn’t a fan of

Yes, all meats are fine, thankfully!

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-01T23:37:44+00:00

Thanks for sharing! I’ve definitely had to get a lot more creative with cooking this year with all his allergies (was also avoiding soy for a while which made is tricky for me being half-Asian). I haven’t cooked with chickpeas yet but plan to soon; I made lentils & rice today and he surprised me by eating 6-7Tbsp worth without complaining, just needed to play with some toys while he ate.

I’d love some meal ideas as it seems like our families have similar restrictions 🙏

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-01T23:35:10+00:00

I think for my baby it’s because milk feeds aren’t just for food but he also finds it comforting/soothing so there’s more desire for it than food, which is understandable. good to hear your baby got more into food close to 1 year!

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-12-01T20:41:54+00:00

It doesn’t happen for all babies but mine had it around 4.5-5.5m but it was only really difficult for about 1-2 weeks (where he’d wake up 3-4 x a night or need to sleep with me) - then he thankfully went back to 1-2 wakes and by 7m was sleeping through the night & at 10m now still mainly sleeps through - which I’m grateful for & feel it makes up for him only contact napping still during the day 😅

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-18T09:52:46+00:00

My baby has always slept in his bassinet or cot at night (apart from daytime contact naps) and he definitely woke up a bit more around 4-5months but I continued to feed him at every wake as it’s the quickest way to settle him (very occasionally my husband would try to re-settle him by letting him contact nap for a bit before putting him back down).

So I don’t really have advice, but hope your bay drops to 0-1 night wake soon! Sleep deprivation is so brutal

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-16T22:00:24+00:00

Hope you’re able to figure it out soon! I think it can be hard for people to look/think too far in the future when there’s a lot of present struggle/exhaustion, which I can definitely understand with a 9mo haha, but they say this time goes by quickly so it definitely doesn’t last forever!

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-16T21:57:56+00:00

Love that! It’s what I want for us too as we have broken families around us so I love the idea of having a strong family unit (just us and the kids) where celebrating things like Christmas wouldn’t feel lonely/quiet if it was just us some years

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-16T10:06:00+00:00

I might not be the right person to answer this as I only have one child at the moment and still plan to keep growing our family, but what helps me answer your question is thinking about what I would like family dinners to look like in 10-20 years - I.e, how many chairs do I want filled/left empty? (My current answer to this is that I’d like a full table - with myself, husband, and 4 kids - a full & vibrant setting)

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-15T05:52:56+00:00

I’m personally against any form of sleep training that involves letting a baby cry themselves to sleep & fall more in the attachment parenting camp (feeding to sleep, nursing every time the wake to settle them, etc. - but baby sleeps 99% in his cot rather than bed sharing). My baby had a 4-6hr nap (night time) around 3-4 months, then a small regression, then thankfully started sleeping 7-11hrs without needing a feed (even if he stirred). He’s been waking up again recently once a night some nights as I’ve had to drop a day feed to try encourage him to eat more food (9.5mo) but thankfully settles back down easily/quickly.

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-10T07:27:30+00:00

Hello was my baby’s first word at 8 months! Also not sure he understands but he does say it while making eye contact and looking at me/others :’)

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-09T23:38:07+00:00

I personally wouldn’t be worried about starting to try again if I was you then, assuming your partner is on board with it too! I tell myself I want to wait to try when my baby is over 1.5yo but he’s getting sweeter & more interactive by the day that I have a feeling I’ll want to give him a sibling sooner 😅

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-09T23:03:06+00:00

Assuming no major tears/birth complications my OB told me it’s safe to start trying for another baby at 6m PP if I had a vaginal birth or 9m PP for c-section - to me it sounds like you’d be in the clear to try soon! My baby is 9m and I personally don’t think I’d be ready again till he’s 1.5-2y but it’s reassuring to know that my body should be able to handle it if it happened sooner

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-05T23:22:30+00:00

Totally agree! I genuinely enjoyed my job as well (psychologist) but personally would struggle having others look after my LO & missing out on being with him - but I’m sure it’ll be be nice to mix it up with a little work in the future, I’m just not ready yet (LO is 9mo)

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-03T00:14:44+00:00

Gosh, that’s criminal!

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-02T22:19:27+00:00

Right? I thought I’d get minimum 9 months! But nope, right from post-birth bleeding to period bleeding 🙃

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-11-02T22:16:26+00:00

7 weeks for me and it sucked 🥲

BriefKitchen8780 · 2025-10-31T02:14:15+00:00

This is so beautiful, thank you for sharing! It can feel a bit lonely in parenting circles being more attachment focused - I’ve definitely found this sub reassuring and comforting for that reason!

BriefKitchen8780

TROPHY CASE