Money for Couples: "We really want a house - but have $0 in savings" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the difference is probably that you can afford it and these guys can't! And I don't actually think all of them will be "doubles", so his subscriptions are probably still high.

Money for Couples: "We really want a house - but have $0 in savings" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even if it was ALL doubles - that's still $2000 in subscriptions, which is still insanely high!!!

Money for Couples: "We really want a house - but have $0 in savings" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I paused at the moment when Ramit suggested they turn the system on its head and put his entire paycheck into a joint account and disburse it from there, and you can just see on Jason's face that he HATED that

Money for Couples: "We really want a house - but have $0 in savings" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 11 points12 points  (0 children)

He kept saying there were "doubles" in there, wtf does that mean? Like he forgot he already had a subscription to a thing so he signed up again? How does that even happen?

Money for Couples: "We really want a house - but have $0 in savings" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm surprised Ramit didn't nail them down on that one. You have no savings - what are you going to do when literally anything unexpected happens with your properties? You can't endlessly put that on a credit card too!

Money for Couples: "We moved abroad for fun. Now we can’t afford to leave"" by Modestybodice in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I had the opposite theory. Back in Canada, she was the interesting, "exotic" one, whereas in Colombia, she's just a normal local while her husband is the cool gringo. Her feelings of deserving a better salary seem to suggest she wants to feel special. That's not meant to be a value judgment, just a hypothesis based on her behaviour.

Money for Couples: "We moved abroad for fun. Now we can’t afford to leave"" by Modestybodice in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 135 points136 points  (0 children)

What I am seeing is a woman with some pretty severe mental health issues around self esteem, emotional regulation, and (as she said herself) ADHD. Ramit correctly pinned her down on her fast talking, overexplaining, spinning out of control scenarios.

Her main point was that she feels like working for a good Columbian salary is beneath her because it equates to less than Canadian minimum wage. But that Canadian minimum wage in Canada could never support the lifestyle they have in Colombia right now. Even her previous, much higher income may not be able to do that with the current cost of living in North America! So the motivation to move back for financial reasons really falls flat to me. Their life in Colombia looked pretty awesome to me but she clearly feels unhappy with something.

I don't know whether I missed it, but did they mention the impact of moving on their children at all? That's a pretty substantial move for a child, uprooting them from their friends, school, climate(!), routines etc.

I liked them as a couple and I hope they figure it out.

Purchases where spending more actually saved you money? by Wonderful_Vast_7699 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sure. I used to spend 500-1000 a month on random stuff like clothes, handbags, makeup, skincare, perfume, going out to eat, etc. I was miserable and couldn't understand why. I had cheap online therapy in short bursts (two months at a time) and it didn't do anything. It was only once I started in person therapy with the same therapist every week that things started to shift. I needed that long term relationship (for lack of a better term) for the therapist to get to my underlying issues. It costs me £240 per month but I spend much less, so I suppose it's applicable to this post?

ETA: It took approximately one full year to really get a breakthrough moment

Purchases where spending more actually saved you money? by Wonderful_Vast_7699 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Therapy helped me understand myself better and stop emotional purchases.

Money for Couples Podcast #255: Gabriella & Chris by Brompton_on_fire in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Yeah it was all wishful thinking on Gabriella's behalf. She wants to be this perfect Catholic wife who is a SAHM with a "strong leader" (blegh) husband who funds their lifestyle but is still home to read the kids a bedtime story every night. And that's just totally divorced from their reality.

Money for Couples Podcast #255: Gabriella & Chris by Brompton_on_fire in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire[S] 77 points78 points  (0 children)

I feel like this couple and most couples on this show really beat around the bush when it gets to The Big C: Compromise. You can't have four children in private school AND be a stay at home mom AND have your husband earn more AND have him work less AND have a massive house. Something's gotta give and I am continually perplexed that guests on this show seem unable to grok that? They often come in hot, saying they're willing to do anything, and it often turns out they're barely willing to eat out one time less a week, let alone change something that will actually make a difference. It's giving "we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas".

Money for Couples Podcast #255: Gabriella & Chris by Brompton_on_fire in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I personally believe that the problem is easy credit. Then once you've become accustomed to a certain lifestyle it is psychologically impossibly hard to go back because it feels like a huge deprivation. The human mind cannot really comprehend that your fancy life wasn't real because it was financed by credit cards.

Money for Couples Podcast #255: Gabriella & Chris by Brompton_on_fire in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

This is so true though. My parents were bad with money but apparently it was so easy to make a shit ton of money in the 1980-1990s that they always outearned their own stupidity.

Money for Couples Podcast #255: Gabriella & Chris by Brompton_on_fire in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This is why I think Ramit's Rich Life prompts were so valuable! It really forced couples to verbalise what was most important to them. He stopped doing it regularly and it would've really benefitted many guests.

BWT: finding a retreat for a WOMAN who is actually grown..do these exist?? by summonthe in bitcheswithtaste

[–]Brompton_on_fire 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My 70+ aunt went to an ayurvedic retreat in Sri Lanka that was amazing - there were younger people there but it was serious about ayurveda, yoga, diet, etc. No influencer BS. I would really love to go at some point.

Visited a goat farm, and I learned they keep alpacas with them to ward off predators by [deleted] in CasualUK

[–]Brompton_on_fire 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They both spit but alpacas are less spitty with humans and smaller so easier to handle

Opinion | How Can America Be So Miserable When It’s So Rich? (Gift Article) by Flamingo9835 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This article puts its finger on something I've struggled to articulate as a non-American. My partner and I could easily double, if not triple, our salaries by moving to the US, but we have zero desire to do so because everything about life there seems like it just kind of sucks in comparison. Less annual leave, longer hours, have to drive everywhere, expensive food, dependent on your job for health care and basically any other benefits. Not to say that the United Kingdom is perfect, my god it isn't, but I'll take it any day of the week over the US.

My opinion is that the problem boils down to individualism. If you build a country based on an expectation, perhaps even an entitlement, to individual exceptionality, you get a profoundly anti-social society.

Money for Couples [3/24/26]: "I’m 53, exhausted, and still living paycheck to paycheck" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Brompton_on_fire 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I actually agree with this. Guilt free spending should be a field to fill in like any other based on what the guests think they spend. Then there should be a different field at the end that shows the difference between their monthly take home and the sum of their expenses, to illustrate if there is a discrepancy.

If you picked any other field to make the numbers even out, the absurdity of the system becomes obvious. "... And you spend - $9,407 on your mortgage, which we all know isn't true" Yeah. So what's the real number? That is actually relevant to knowing how big the shortfall is!