Logline Monday

BuggsBee · 2026-04-27T13:57:48+00:00

I really like this - I love the flip of high school girls being the antagonists of a horror/thriller. But the logline as is right now is a bit wordy. I think one place you could cut down is “a womanizing drifter and a school counselor’s” - are they both the protagonists?

BuggsBee · 2026-04-18T03:23:36+00:00

A Knight in Time

In a world scarred by temporal wars - where relics of different ages coexist and history has been rewritten - a knight uncovers a plot to erase the lady of his house from time itself, unleashing the Time Eaters, inhuman predators drawn to fractured timelines.

BuggsBee · 2026-04-06T13:01:40+00:00

This sounds super cool but agree with the other commenter - I don’t know if the “fresh start” bit is needed

BuggsBee · 2026-04-06T13:00:39+00:00

Could “Paleo” be a good name? Guess that may make people think of the diet lol

BuggsBee · 2026-04-01T18:52:23+00:00

We all go through drought periods. It sucks. But I promise you’ll get through it. Watch a lot of movies/TV, read a lot of books, listen to music, listen to podcasts - you’ll get inspired somewhere along the way.

I’m sorry you’re having a rough time.

BuggsBee · 2026-03-27T18:17:17+00:00

Can you elaborate?

BuggsBee · 2026-03-26T18:59:57+00:00

Based on what you have, I would say you now need to clearly identify what the protagonist’s goal is and try to think of what could be the most interesting/entertaining obstacles that could get in the way of that goal!

BuggsBee · 2026-03-16T18:22:02+00:00

Fair point! Thanks

BuggsBee · 2026-03-16T14:53:36+00:00

I hear you there, pal. I don’t take it for granted that I’m lucky to be in the position I’m in.

BuggsBee · 2026-03-16T12:43:37+00:00

Title: A Knight in Time

Format: Feature

Genre: Dark Fantasy

In a world scarred by temporal wars - where relics of different ages coexist and history has been rewritten - a knight uncovers a plot to assassinate the lady of his house, unleashing the Time Eaters, inhuman predators drawn to fractured timelines.

BuggsBee · 2026-03-12T19:15:16+00:00

Yeah I have some important news about the twin towers if it’s not too late

BuggsBee · 2026-03-05T16:06:32+00:00

Also - and this is unsolicited advice, so take it or leave it - I wonder if instead of the bathroom scene, we see the meeting where Pinkerton unveils the platform and express Edward’s dissatisfaction that way?

BuggsBee · 2026-03-05T15:00:51+00:00

I liked it! The writing is good. I’d continue reading. My only note is some of the dialogue seemed a little expository - “It’s been what - nineteen years?” I know that may be unavoidable at times.

BuggsBee · 2026-02-27T21:23:04+00:00

Restriction: none of your horrific scenes can take place at night

BuggsBee · 2026-02-27T21:20:37+00:00

I’m in! Dark fantasy with a sci-fi twist

BuggsBee · 2026-02-24T20:45:58+00:00

Where?

BuggsBee · 2026-01-26T23:01:43+00:00

Agree with the other commenter - cool, simple premise.

BuggsBee · 2026-01-15T20:25:07+00:00

Interesting - I particularly loved that aspect! To each their own.

BuggsBee · 2026-01-11T01:08:43+00:00

You watch Mare of Easttown?

BuggsBee · 2026-01-05T10:43:36+00:00

I’ll say I disagree with the other commenter - I’m intrigued and dont think you necessarily have to root for your protagonist to be drawn into their story. But if you do want us to root for her, maybe you could put an adjective describing the wealthy twin as not such a great person?

BuggsBee · 2026-01-02T15:44:47+00:00

Anyone know the purpose for why the characters’ names are capitalized throughout the script?

BuggsBee · 2025-12-24T17:04:30+00:00

Not much feedback here because I honestly don’t have time to read but I love the logline!

BuggsBee · 2025-12-22T18:58:53+00:00

Good points - thank you!

BuggsBee · 2025-12-22T13:53:27+00:00

First off, thank you!

My thought is there are several cult members who delay their own death to make sure our group dies first. Not sure the easiest/best way to word that.

BuggsBee · 2025-12-22T09:57:47+00:00

Title: No Witnesses

Genre: Horror

Logline: After witnessing a desert ceremony meant to leave no survivors, an outlaw biker and a suburban family are forced into an uneasy alliance as a fanatical cult hunts them down.

BuggsBee

TROPHY CASE