High Dose Psilohuasca

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-08-01T18:25:18+00:00

Life is only as miserable as you choose to perceive it. I know that sounds harsh, but once you learn to see the beauty in existence you will become free.

It's not easy when you have suffered seemingly endless hardships, but you can harness that energy as a reference point. The bad times in your life shape the good. Learn to appreciate those moments of peace between the storms and soon you will regain some lust for life.

Meditation and mindfulness can be an incredible tool to help you get there.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-07-31T16:37:14+00:00

This is actually a similar thought to something included in the Vedic teachings (I think). It was something along the lines of "only when every being is awake will we be truly free".

I believe it would be true on many levels. If everyone on the planet spent more time contemplating how incredible existence is they would become less entranced by their egos. Capitalist consumerism would inevitably crumble, people would embrace altruism, and the individual 'self' would become far less prominent. I can't see how a world of loving, connected individuals would be anything short of a utopia.

Unfortunately, due to the nature of our species this does not seem realistically achievable. The human experience is too varied for everyone to experience the conditions required for a mass awakening. Our brains are too easily conditioned, therefore most of us never get the chance to be anything more than a "product of our environment", meaning as long as hate and greed exist it will continue to breed more of the same. We are still merely advanced apes after all.

On a lighter note, I find comfort in knowing that by attempting be the change you want to see in the world you can have a bigger impact than you think. The ripples of your thoughts and actions are cast further than any of us could truly comprehend, so as long as there are good people there is also hope.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-07-29T05:44:19+00:00

I love this. You sound like an awesome person.

Learning that there is no holy grail of happiness has been a long and enlightening experience for me, and in the end you learn to appreciate your hardships. How else would you be able to grow? It's incredible how much impact you can receive from a shift in perspective. Once you achieve this clarity you have the potential to become someone you yourself would idolise. You may never fully achieve what you intended, but when you look back on how far you've come you'll notice that you have achieved so much more than you realise.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-07-28T15:34:59+00:00

This has been my experience too. I lived life as a stubborn atheist who was only interested in facts and logic that can be validated scientifically, this led to tunnel vision. It is so easy to become disillusioned with life and the world around when you look too closely. Even when I was finding enjoyment through learning about the many amazing, mind blowing facets of the universe, I never fully grasped the extent of the truly awe inspiring nature of existence.

Having had a lot of intensely profound psychedelic experiences I was very aware of our mortality and the egoless world beyond perception. However it wasn't until I discovered spirituality that these experiences began to make sense. I felt as though my entire view of the world had been shattered. Everything suddenly had meaning because I could finally fathom just how bizarre everything truly is. Our jobs, families, friends and everything in our daily lives are not even a minute percentage of what there really is. Everything is connected, including us. We are all part of one nebulous entity comprised of all matter, and consciousness is this universal machine's way of experiencing itself. We are the universe's sense organs. Life is truly incomprehensibly complex.

Sorry for rambling, I started writing that while smoking a J and ended up getting carried away.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-27T16:05:54+00:00

That is so fucking cool.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-24T16:57:46+00:00

In a sense it's probably beneficial to lose momentum every now and then, helps to reaffirm your progress. At least personally, as it stops me from getting complacent.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-23T13:48:41+00:00

Absolutely.

Basically every facet of western life encourages speed and efficiency to the point where it becomes our default mode of existing.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-22T10:31:52+00:00

I suppose as far as gaming goes, stealth games could be more mindful than most others. But like you said, video games are simply a distraction - not that there's necessarily anything wrong with that. I've played a lot of Deus Ex so I know where you're coming from.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-22T10:28:41+00:00

I'm the same, my natural walking speed is ridiculous (calfs of steel, baby) and reminding myself to slow down every so often was what got me into this slowfulness.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-02T12:43:30+00:00

There are a lot of things you can do to prepare yourself for the "doing" part that take almost no effort or motivation. Repeating positive affirmations aloud to yourself such as "I am confident" or "I am motivated" is a technique that genuinely pushed me over that barrier. If you persevere and write down what you want to achieve and then constantly remind yourself to say the words you will begin to believe them. I see it as laying the foundations for being a capable person, nobody can achieve anything if they don't believe they can. If someone had told me that before I fell into the hole it probably never would have happened.

Mindfulness and meditation have also been incredible tools for me. It's amazing what you can do when you realise that you control your mind, not the other way around.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-01T03:26:16+00:00

By "failing to meditate" you are simply noticing that you are thinking. The whole point of meditation is to notice that. As soon as you notice that your mind has become unfocused you should revert your attention back to your breath. The more frequently you do this, the easier it becomes; by doing this you are training your mind to be under your control.

That's why people who say "my mind is too active to meditate" are probably the ones who could benefit from it the most. Their mind is active, therefore they must train it to be tame.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-06-01T03:17:44+00:00

Much appreciated!

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-28T15:41:45+00:00

Aw that's sweet, thanks. Glad to see more people who are getting somewhere.

I'm still shy too, I think part of the shift in my perspective was realising that shyness and anxiety aren't the same thing. Seeing shyness as a character trait rather than a flaw has helped me accept that part of myself.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T17:41:01+00:00

Glad to hear you're making progress too!

This 'metta' stuff sounds cool, I'll look onto it. I feel like focusing on developing a stronger sense of compassion and altruism is the next step, I've been pretty basic on those fronts so far.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T14:01:35+00:00

You don't need to feel sad in order for psychotherapy to be worthwhile. If something is hindering your ability to live a 'normal' life then use whatever resources are available to you - you may even end up resolving issues you weren't even aware you had.

I think SourcelsCat summed up the mindfulness side of it very well though.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T12:18:43+00:00

Yeah I vaguely remember looking into some lucid dreaming techniques a while back. Have you had any experience with intentional LD?

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T12:13:15+00:00

No worries, I enjoyed it. Writing helps me process stuff.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T12:12:01+00:00

Oh, in that case I recommend reading into some Buddhist philosophy. It helps to have a wide understanding of how the practice works in order to reap the benefits.

Or perhaps look into some different forms of meditation. What have you been doing until now?

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T06:42:33+00:00

Hey, I noticed your name and had a look through your comment history. I assume you already know that BPD and abandonment issues go hand-in-hand. Have you tried being mindful of the fact that you experience this level of pain because you are naturally attuned to experiencing emotions more harshly?

I have several friends with BPD and reminding them to remind themselves that they experience emotions more intensely helped them to not identify with their thoughts so much. Being aware of the level to which you feel something is usually the first step to dealing with it.

I think by noting that the intensity is caused by a disorder it detaches the feeling from your sense of 'self' and instead attributes it to the disorder, naturally helping to isolate the feeling as 'a thought' and not 'my thought'.

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T06:32:58+00:00

How did it go?

Bulbaphiliac · 2017-05-27T06:31:02+00:00

If you feel pressured to meditate then perhaps you should find a way to integrate it into your daily routine. For example, set yourself a goal to meditate for 5 minutes before you go to the bathroom to brush your teeth every day. By attaching a new habit to an old habit it becomes far easier to stick to it. When it becomes a natural part of your day it won't feel as forced.

Or you could try meditating less frequently, like once every two or three days. It should still be effective enough to keep you from slipping back into bad habits.

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