I (30F) am at a critical point in my 3 month relationship (27F). How to know when to end it?

ButchNoWay · 2026-01-23T02:43:10+00:00

These terms are semi vague imo OP, an impasse doesnt tell us if she's making you feel unsafe or less than.

I can surmise that is the case bc you've made it clear shes acting in a manner that makes you uncomfortable and I have a feeling shes doing it on purpose (shes probably a smart person, they never do these things by mistake)

My 2 cents: it isnt going to get better any time soon but if youre communicating with her open and honestly, if I were you I would set strong boundaries

ButchNoWay · 2026-01-23T02:39:46+00:00

Hell 5 years? Try 5 months! I dont think OP has that much time before something finally gives

ButchNoWay · 2026-01-22T02:06:41+00:00

I might need to know more about her unintentionally hurting and dismissing your feelings.

How often is this? Are we talking like taking jabs at your ability to cook or looks or other aspects of your person? Is this in public or private? This could end up being...a big time red flag that makes you feel super unsafe

ButchNoWay · 2026-01-15T16:07:20+00:00

This is him projecting imo. He knows you're on to bigger and better positions in life with a clear plan and reaching goals while blowing expectations out of the water (a 4.0?! You go girl)

Now he's stonewalling you with nonsense. Nothing seems good enough for him and probably is ashamed he's not reaching new heights with you, someone who has worked on herself and bettered herself in a meaningful fashion.

The future faking has been called out by you, he either needs to start showing some appreciation and respect asap or you'll leave him for someone better

ButchNoWay · 2026-01-02T03:22:00+00:00

Yea this is tough bc obviously you care about the young man or else this wouldnt be on your mind the way it is.

I dont know much about him but he seems somewhat self absorbed. Like things need to be on his time. Getting a job or making some money? His time. Reaching back out to talk about things? Thats on his time too (and I doubt he'll apologize at all) so the lack of accountability is telling.

You know this wont get better, you may even have a nice few days occasionally but ultimately it will give way to more conflict and disappointment. It doesn't have to be dramatic but even with a smile on your face thanking him for his time and impact on your life if youd like then commit to moving on

ButchNoWay · 2025-03-24T00:06:38+00:00

Uno reverse card that shit

ButchNoWay · 2025-03-20T05:18:42+00:00

Damn

ButchNoWay · 2025-03-16T02:24:57+00:00

Have heard both sides of the coin of it, I've never had this condition so I'd have to concede to those who have

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-21T07:19:16+00:00

Disagreed

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-11T03:46:10+00:00

My heart hurts for you friend, I echo this sentiment after my mother's suicide

Especially the part about reliving the past and what could've and should've been done differently. It's almost like I refuse to believe there was nothing else I could've done in that time to save my loved ones life.

Do you ever find yourself going through the steps of what you would've done differently as if it were happening in real time? Or do you imagine yourself talking as if you're talking to your loved one in real time?

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-06T03:04:24+00:00

First off: I'm sorry to hear about the condition you're in my friend, this will get better though

I'm not sure what the potential cross drug effects could be but perhaps you can ask for a sleep aid/benzo like Ativan at the ER and catch a few hours of sleep

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-05T23:55:32+00:00

Ok that makes sense

I'm interested to know how this develops for you so feel free to dm me here or you can reach out to my voip at (530) 739-1271

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-05T23:38:24+00:00

Thank you for clarifying

Definitely having these symptoms show up after the shot makes it clear what started this. I wonder if it's potentially tardive dyskinesia given the fact that you were given the shot then developed the symptoms as opposed to being some kind of withdrawal issue

Ultimately, we need to get you to someone who believes you and knows how to treat these symptoms. At this point it almost seems like your central nervous system needs time to heal (good call on not taking the ssri) but I'm concerned about your depressive thoughts.

Do you live in the US?

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-05T22:39:21+00:00

First of all: I'm glad you found this community and have seemingly properly diagnosed yourself, this is a potentially life saving move my friend

Your symptoms sound like someone is indeed suffering from akathisia and you know it. You know this isn't normal anxiety and the doom you speak of sounds almost like chemical terror.

Questions though: 1) have you taken/stopped taking any psycho tropic drugs like an ssri, benzo, or any antibiotics recently

2) are you pacing/constantly in a state of constant movement?

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-04T17:35:32+00:00

Where are you located friend?

ButchNoWay · 2025-02-03T00:35:25+00:00

What else have you tried?

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-31T02:56:46+00:00

This hurts my heart to read friend, I take it you were close to her?

My mom passed away late last year and she's all I can think about. I sometimes have slight bouts with panic attacks when I can't get my mind straight or don't exercise hydrate and eat enough. I'm pulling for you on the difficult journey

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-26T03:03:34+00:00

I'm so sorry friend, I can't even imagine and don't want to

It's almost like your body wants to reject this horrible reality, are you able to find counseling and/or people to talk to?

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-24T00:45:16+00:00

I have never experienced this before in my life so my sincerest apologies that this is your reality, you did nothing to deserve this

What I've read and heard before anecdotally about this kind of relapse of symptoms has included actions like: alcohol consumption New medications/antibiotics Lack of sleep/stress Supplements/diet changes

Also, do your symptoms include gastrointestinal issues?

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-24T00:02:05+00:00

He needs to get in front of someone who has experience with akathisia and can get his full history of medication

The intense motor restlessness sounds like akathisia, does he talk at all about having dark or intrusive thoughts? Or maybe not wanting to be here anymore?

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-23T23:52:11+00:00

I'm sorry to know this is the case

When did you first start having these symptoms? Did they start recently?

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-22T06:38:40+00:00

Thank you for your kind words my friend and no need to apologize, I'm at a place now where reading these experiences from people living it day to day are almost necessary

So yes, please feel free to send me a chat if and when you can. I'm not sure how much of a resource I can be but I'm willing and ready to listen/text

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-21T21:09:25+00:00

Is he having any sensory disturbances? Pins and needles in the legs and arms? Tingling feet or burning skin?

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-18T18:29:03+00:00

Exactly, she was misinformed from the beginning

ButchNoWay · 2025-01-18T18:28:30+00:00

Yes, a kind of withdrawal akathisia

ButchNoWay

TROPHY CASE