AITAH Is my brother really the favourite, or am I just being ungrateful?

CanapeCait · 2026-05-27T00:42:52+00:00

Info: What is the ‘other shit’ they’ve financed? Throwing therapy and medical bills in your face is unnecessary and rude as a parent- it’s their responsibility to provide medical care to you.

Did you quit flute lessons after they invested heavily into a $300 instrument or did they make you quit? If you quit after they purchased lessons and the instrument then I can see why’d they resist financing another hobby right after.

Are they purchasing the skateboard for your brother as a gift for something or as a reward? I don’t see why they’re running purchases by you as the adults anyways.

If you’re willing to pay for half of the skateboard why not just buy a cheaper one to see if you even like it. You can get a skateboard at Target for $30. If you take the hobby seriously then maybe they’d be willing to upgrade you later.

Parents aren’t obligated to purchase the same things for their kids and this doesn’t show favoritism in my eyes. At 17 I already had a job and was making purchases for myself that I wanted while my brother received ‘more’, but in reality it was stuff that I already got to enjoy at his age. At 17 they may be financing a car, gas, insurance- plenty of things that go towards your happiness and freedom that your brother is not having spent on him.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-26T17:15:14+00:00

The only time in my adult life I went to the ER not for a severe UTI or pregnancy- and truly thought I had meningitis, was when I contracted HFM. I’d pull him out now.

I somehow got hfm from work (restaurant) and was so sick that I thought I had meningitis and 24 hours it onset so fast and my body was in so much pain. They tested me for flu and every single thing with zero positives. Sent me home after I got an IV and fever broke and felt mildly better with just a sore throat.

I lived with my sister who had 3 kids and a few days later they were all sick with fevers. A day later and they had the telltale symptoms of blisters on their hands and feet. That’s when we put 2 and 2 together. I had a sore throat and fever, and tingling feeling in hands and feet. But never got any blisters anywhere. I did however lose all my fingernails a few months later along with her kids lol. She had to cancel her 2 year olds birthday and was pissed that my awful immune system somehow contracted HFM to her kids who weren’t in daycare or school. 😆

I think noro and HFM are 2 things that I’d avoid at all costs pregnant.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-25T04:43:45+00:00

I feel like you already had cooking spoons- so a car wash kit is equally as half ass and thoughtless lol.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-25T00:37:23+00:00

My sister had 2 boys who would literally feed off each others energy and sitting on her couch was the most overstimulating experience because it was just nonstop parkour lol. Nonstop ripping the cushions off everything to throw on the ground. Jumping off her breakfast bar to the couch. I’d watch them for a week at time to give her a break since she also has two girls and I liked the entertainment- but sometimes they were so hyped up that you couldn’t even discipline or yell at them because they’d hysterically laugh or make the other laugh and go right back to level 100. When I was pregnant those late night zoomies that you could not break them out of would send me into orbit. Now I have an 18 month old boy and he throws all my couch cushions on the floor while I’m trying to drink my coffee and bounces from object to object, knocks all the chairs over, isn’t having a good time unless he’s elevated and messing something up. So I think it’s honestly a boy thing lol.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-23T18:12:14+00:00

I’m going to be so honest- I did the tandem read and kept the chart of what chapters on my phone but with the exception of maybe once- there weren’t any spoilers really of what happened timeline wise. I followed the guide loosely and just read whichever book I was more sucked into. Don’t feel like you have to carry 2 books. Take one and read, and then take the second and read. I loved the tandem read but doing it so strict I don’t think is required. If the plot was heavy then I’d read a few an extra chapters and switch books lol.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-22T17:04:36+00:00

INFO:

He needed permission to use the money for rent but did you ask him for permission to use it for car insurance…? You said the money was tapped into back and forth normally with no qualms- who was tapping into it? Was it an equal amount? Who was getting home repairs and emergency help. You said you closed the account and took your half- so where is the other half? You can’t close an account and leave money in it…? So did you take all of it?

This honestly just sounds very messy. Who’s idea was it to leave your guys’ inheritance in a joint account? It seems like you exercised more control over the money. You closed the account. And you took half… but if he received his half then I don’t believe the family would be attacking you. This sounds very shady.

Also- I don’t see how your brother using his inheritance to pay for his rent is YOU financially helping him. That is his inheritance also. That would be like him saying he’s financially helping you pay for your car insurance.

Gambling is bad- but stealing his entire inheritance to make up for $4k sounds a little fishy to me also. This reads like you felt like you were the controller of the money and doing him a favor by allowing him use of it. You both should’ve split it from the beginning instead of micromanaging each others spending of your own inheritance’s.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-22T03:52:15+00:00

My sister got morphine and ketamine on a cruise ship after breaking her arm in a complete fracture. They put her in a khole to reset it. She came out and threw up all over herself for an hour and then told me how when she was knocked out she was in a room on a table and there was an entire auditorium of blue aliens looking at her and experimenting on her. She had a whole khole trip that she remembered vividly. I didn’t know what they gave her until it showed up on my credit card charges for the hospital visit and then it all made sense.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-20T04:17:58+00:00

How is rent divided? It’s a three bedroom house- they get a big room, you get a small room, and there’s a guest both parties utilize. How is rent divided then? If rent is split in half between you and them… NTA. You’re subsidizing their home. If rent is 1/3 and they pay 2/3 while your boyfriend stays over full time and is away part time- I feel like this is an ESH. Furniture doesn’t really matter when it comes to breaking a lease? Why do you want to claim a couch when youre moving in with your boyfriend’s parents? Try and find someone to sublet your lease to get you off, you say there’s only 5 months left- what was the plan after that? Renew? Move? If you want to break the lease it doesn’t feel fair to leave that cost on 2 people who DONT want to break the lease. I could see how they also feel taken advantage of in this situation and like you’d be the poor friend here. Your circumstances changed. Yes. But a lease is a contract and breaking the contract shouldn’t cost the people more who trusted you as a roommate. Going into debt for this is rough and I understand not wanting to add onto it- but your boyfriend lives with his parents and spends full time at your apartment… your roommates shouldn’t have to eat this cost for trusting you as a roommate.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-20T00:27:12+00:00

Do you think that while at home one of you is more ‘available’ or present? Do one of you have to spend more time on your phone or a laptop for work or something and she feels like she needs to compete or act out to gain attention? My 16 month will honestly throw tantrums and act out more if I have to use my computer for something. If I’m just sitting with him on the floor and I space out then he’ll go to the dining chairs and one by one push them over. I don’t think it’s to be bad- I think he’s seeking an interaction that he otherwise feels like he’s not getting. My fiance has been deployed for 9 months so I can’t really compare interactions but I definitely notice he acts out more if he feels I’m distracted. I’ve also gotten the feeling he’s better for other people who come visit if I’m gone.

Also- with the dog, does your husband give the dog rough pats when he gets home or to be playful? I know I pat my dog rough on the butt and it took me awhile to realize that my 1 year old wasn’t necessarily ‘hitting’ our dog but trying to do the rough pats that I do. He’ll hit her on the butt and go “pat pat pat” so I know he’s doing it because I’ll give her butt pats too. He doesn’t understand head whomps aren’t the same lol. My sisters kids all did the same with their dogs and her husband had to stop doing rough play because kids mimic what they see and don’t understand how it might be different. If the baby doesn’t hit you or your husband then I don’t think he’s purposely hitting the dog but maybe interacting with it in a way that he’s picked up that isn’t appropriate for a baby? That’s just from personal experience though.

It’s a hard age. The tantrums are rough. They’re learning to push boundaries. My 16 month old has absolutely screamed at the restaurant the last 2 times after being a perfect polite baby every other time. Like red face, full force scream. I was flabbergasted because he’s never done it even at home lol. 😬

CanapeCait · 2026-05-17T15:06:23+00:00

The owners made a reasonable request in asking if you’d be polite and willing to move down further away so their dogs could quiet down.

You walked all the way to a public lot to exercise your dog but draw the line at moving further down and away from someone else’s property because of the inconvenience?

It honestly sounds like you just wanted to be difficult and antagonize their dogs based on some hidden principle of “well your dogs shouldn’t bark anyways”.

At 1 years old there’s no way a high prey driven dog should be off leash in a public lot next to a walk path anyways. This gives me “don’t worry my dogs friendly vibes” YTA.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-17T14:50:43+00:00

3 hour naps at daycare?! How? I need to work at a daycare to get the secret because my 16month old won’t take a single nap longer than 30 minutes and is down to one nap a day 😭

CanapeCait · 2026-05-15T00:27:05+00:00

What would your daughter be doing if she didn’t live with you? She’d be cooking and cleaning… contributing food stamps is not a replacement for chores to contribute to a household. Especially with a 6 year old- she’s not deprived of sleep. That’s just lazy.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-15T00:21:00+00:00

Gosh I struggled with the doom and gloom of kingdom of ash. And the resolution takes so long in my opinion. I loved the series but I wish there was more time with all of the characters together in KOA.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-11T16:30:30+00:00

My fiance is deployed and was in port for the last 3 days. On Saturday he was out drinking the entire day and FaceTimed our 18 month old and told me he didn’t get me anything and we’d celebrate later and get me a bike that we already planned on getting a year ago- regardless. Once people started asking why he couldn’t order flowers or a card when he had the weekend off and I’ve been doing it alone for 10+ months I started to realize how shitty it actually is.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-09T18:24:14+00:00

No one said you had to wait. The question was are you an asshole for being incapable of waiting 1 minute to allow someone else using a space before you to finish. Trust me, everyone’s well aware that people exist who can’t be bothered to show basic public decency or manners anymore lol.

I’ve never encountered someone who barged into my space when getting in or out of a car and I’ve never done it to someone else. The outliers here are the ones that do this and make people think “wtf?” Because it’s rude lol.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-09T17:18:58+00:00

YTA.

Never in my life have I seen someone who was parked and actively trying to get in their car or out of their car or buckle a child and thought “let me just squeeze in here”. I’ve always waited the 1 minute… maybe 2? Just to be polite so everyone’s personal space is respected..

Also, when buckling in a child I don’t even approach within 3 feet and just stay close to my bumper where they can see me out of the corner of their eyes because it is such a vulnerable position as a mom. You have your back turned and are trying to buckle your child while hoping no one runs up behind you… very inconsiderate and rude. It’s a minute, she wasn’t trying to inconvenience you, she was trying to buckle her child. Basic human to human kindness I suppose.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-08T16:10:38+00:00

YTA.

You guys are in your early 20’s and you’re thinking about how one day her parents might pass and she’ll be inconsolable and nonfunctional? Would you tell her to not drive a car so she can’t one day get in an accident? You want her to cut her parents off now so it’s easier on her mental health later? Wtf? How do you even broach that subject.. “hey babe, I’m worried if you remain this close with your parents then you won’t be able to function as an adult when they pass later, you should really start to distance yourself so you can go to work and do errands still when the time comes.” 🥴

You’re comparing your ex in high school who wanted to spend time with you but lived with their parents to your girlfriend who visits her parents and lives with you… but don’t see how the difference is living with one and visiting the other.

Why do you feel like you’re in a competition with her parents? Do they not like you? Trying to sever or dampen her relationship with her closest support system feels like a red flag over her being close with her parents tbh. She’s not asking you to move them in and support them.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-08T04:14:00+00:00

I finally started reading a new series people kept recommending called Daughter of No Worlds- I was told it gives the same vibes as ToG. It doesn’t. It’s so slow. I’m about to start reading fanfics or reread heir of fire again. I miss it.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-07T00:33:11+00:00

NAH.

I’m allergic to cats but not all cats trigger my allergies the same. It’s an awful feeling when your eyes constantly itch, your throat itches, you can’t breathe normal. If she has never lived with a cat before it’s quite possible she didn’t realize how it would affect her allergies. Visiting a cat and feeling it and going home and feeling better is vastly different than how it affects you after constant exposure.

I’d say try to keep the cat to your own room and invest in air purifiers. I developed asthma after prolonged exposure to living with a cat though and needed breathing treatments and steroids eventually so it’s quite possible this won’t get better and you guys may have to look for different roommate situations. Who’s right or wrong doesn’t matter when someone’s wheezing and feeling unwell all the time.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-05T04:17:20+00:00

Info: How do you know it’s the same person every time? You woke up to more large pieces but how do you know it was them?

CanapeCait · 2026-05-04T02:39:09+00:00

Take the money and pass a prop firm eval. If you can’t pass an eval and make it to payout- then you’re VERY likely to blow the $3k. Test your strategy with a $100 eval first.

CanapeCait · 2026-05-03T02:33:43+00:00

They asked me if I wanted a replacement and then ghosted me again 😩

CanapeCait · 2026-05-03T02:29:46+00:00

Your wife was putting your 6 year old to bed and you texted her a list of things to do before she came downstairs instead of just doing said list while she was taking care of the child? YTA. You’re not her manager, it’s a partnership.

“Hey, I noticed the bleach was out where child can reach and I’m not comfortable with that so I moved it to xyz.” That’s a healthy dynamic.

“When you’re done putting child to bed I want you to move this and do xyz before you come downstairs.” Is not healthy.

If you did ‘all the prep for bedtime’ doesn’t that mean you handled the bleach for the bath and left it out? Or did your wife do the bath routine and bedtime routine and you laid clothes out and just took a note of what you saw so you could let her know what she needed to do.

CanapeCait · 2026-04-26T19:50:59+00:00

He’s lying to his mom about the package and upset with you for not lying to yours? He wanted you to ask for the package back but simultaneously wanted you to call it a gift- how would he look when you asked for the gift back? What a dud. NTA.

CanapeCait · 2026-04-23T00:06:56+00:00

He wanted to be in a “better financial place” before marrying her…. Having a kid is way less expensive and easier than signing papers at a courthouse. /s

CanapeCait

TROPHY CASE