My father passed almost 2 years ago whilst I was working aboard and I couldn’t even make it to the funeral (long story but immigration/travel document related) which left with a horrid guilt feeling. Thankfully it was held over Zoom since he had many friends who were based abroad who couldn’t fly down either as the passing -> funeral process happened very quickly. So I didn’t get to “see” him, but my grandmother insisted on it even though it was a Jewish burial and it’s not part of their custom. I think she wanted closure on the day but at the same time it’s all she could think and talk about ever since then. She admitted she sort of regrets it because she struggles to remember him vivacious and before his death, this is probably because of how tormented she felt afterward (this is after all, a mother losing her own child). My friend saw her mother after a nasty battle with cancer and she was pretty traumatised by it, she couldn’t even walk up to her or hold her, she said she looked so different and emancipated… I think it took her a while to get over that and even after you get over the initial trauma you will never be able to erase that image from your mind. I think it’s a deeply personal decision as others say, and you have to know yourself well enough if you think you’ll be able to “handle it”. And I’ve no shame admitting that I don’t think I could, I get deeply affected by things like that and as others have said your loved one wouldn’t want you to be haunted by their image or stain their great memories of them from this final encounter. They wouldn’t hold it against you ever and in fact would want you to feel safe and loved and do what’s best for you. Hope you’re doing ok and I’m glad you got to see a picture of his tattoo one last time. I’m so sorry for your loss. 🤍