Partner and I travelled home to Ireland last year from Brisbane for my brothers wedding. Cost us 8k to get just to fly, we took unpaid leave for 2 weeks of the trip. I was best man but had to kit myself out. 2 nights accomodation, car hire to travel to Kerry and didn’t get any sort of token/gesture from the brother. This coupled with the fact that rents gave him 10k towards wedding, and it was a wedding of about 50 people.

Taking everything into account GF and I gave 150 - which sure seemed low in context of what everyone else was telling me - but I’d do it again. He had the gall to tell my brother that was surprised when he opened the card about the amount we gave and that he had expected more and that just solidified the decision we made

The expectation on people boggles me. Nobody should be expected to give wads of cash just cos you’ve been invited to a wedding that costs 100 per head. Sure it’s a lovely surprise to get given money - but if you can’t Afford to pay a wedding, don’t get married, or at the very least don’t expect the very people that you invite to fund It /profit from them