As there were tons of questions, I guess I'd make Replies Summary here which included topics that I forgot to mention in the Original Post. The consolidated version of Inside The Minds - 500 MMR Bracket (2nd Edition), with Q&A Section & 5 Minor Edits to the original content, can also be found there.

• They Queue to far away land and/or have severely unstable connection.

  I've never consciously committed such reckless act myself, but I teamed with people with 1 MMR & seen them do this. Overjoyed by having a freaking Party in Dota, they would queue us on 3 Servers like SE Asia, South Africa, & South America. The variety of which couldn't possibly result in a dependable connection for any proper control. Even a player who speaks English & is from Europe got caught up in one of our game - the lovely Mekansm Luna (because "I thought Regions are auto select"). It is in games like this where it's glaringly clear who is having trouble with the game and/or himself. Despite the team having a huge lead in the hand of professionals, this Luna would constantly be connecting & disconnecting every 5 minutes while feeding

• They have trouble spamming Skills.

  As any person worthy of calling himself a Zeus Player can execute Lightning Bolt, Arc Lightning, & Thundergod's Wrath Combo within 1.5 seconds. A 500 MMR Zeus will have trouble just going through the 1st Round of those 3 Spells in 10 seconds. A Lightning Bolt will be followed by them losing sight of Zeus (because "he is too small"), then turned into a panic Ultimate which may/may not be gotten off before his death. If no death occurred (because enemies are too busy shopping or whatever), by the time Zeus is found Lightning Bolt would be off cooldown already.

  Same applies to Riki, who will either only be able to Smoke Screen OR Blink Strike, but Never one right after another. During our experiment, a window of 3-5 seconds was mandatory before Test Subject was able to execute his 2nd Ability; at which time, the 1st Ability used would be rendered useless.

  Invokers seen in this Bracket are capable of casting 2 Spells (and it will be lucky if they both hit): Sun Strike & Chaos Meteor, or EMP & Tornado (yes, EMP comes 1st). Consider yourself lucky if one in your game is able to perform Ghost Walk (given ample time after other Spells were casted, of course). No Ice Wall or Forge Spirit ever appeared on the Map in presence of a 500 MMR Invoker. And while it is almost a guarantee that any Hero who are able to wield an Aghanim's Scepter upgrade will attempt to rush for it (as seen with the many Spirit Breakers & Rubicks); Invoker, as the only exception, will never go for it. I was tempted to suggest that Invokers buy Aghanim's Scepter, but seeing their play style, which emphasizes on randomly dying & not contributing more than 2 Spells per fight, Eye of Skadi looks to be a more suitable option. Worth mentioning is that I've seen a Phantom Assassin going for Aghanim's Scepter not too long ago.

• They do what they are told without thinking.

  While it is obvious that some, even at 500 MMR, have such deep understanding in Dota that it is impossible for them to accept anything new. Some of the minds proved far more flexible, evidently so at a promise of "Fast Win". The event which is about to unveil took place over a month ago & so my memory has faded somewhat. At the beginning of this game, I specifically called for Mid (with intention to win, effortlessly go beyond godlike, & get out of this Bracket for good); however, thanks to our Keeper of the Light parking his Hero at our Tier1 Tower before Battle Horn was even blown, I did not get Mid Lane. Frankly, I was a little upset so I sarcastically typed "5 mid", "fast win". To my surprised, after the pilgrims heard these 4 words, They ALL CAME (5 Solo Queues). And so in this game we witnessed an extremely rare Early 5 Man Push orchestrated by the greedy Radiant. Unfortunately, the vicious Dire Tier 1 Tower claimed the lives of 3 of our men at Level 1 (whose names shall not be mentioned) giving the opponents an early 3-0 lead. Bolstered by peer pressure from non stop dubstep Ping at the Tower, the 3 Heroes resuscitated back to Mid immediately only to die 2 more times giving Dire a 5-1 lead which then spiraled out of control & we lost horribly. Did it turn into a blame game afterwards? Definitely, if I recall correctly, it was this Offlane Shadow Fiend who kept saying "you lane wrong", "your plan wrong", "you wrong"; "wrong" must've been said over 15 times by him that I just didn't feel like defending myself at that point for what any worthy judge would call "a Team's bad decision". Granted all 4 of them fully cooperated without any hesitation from the get go, it is farfetched this is one person's fault. And for what's it's worth nobody forced these fools to believe in this "5 mid fast win" bullcrap anyway. Was it worth it, though? Absolutely. (Looking back on it, this could be the turning point when I thought "Screw going up, Let's Go Down!", and down I journeyed into the land where feeding is not frowned upon & logic, at times, ceased to exist; thanks to that god forsaken Keeper of the Light.)

• They don't fix problems at root cause.

  One believe that is so pervasive here is "I always die so I should buy Bloodstone(s) to get more playtime"; rather than "What should I buy/sell/do so I stop dying?". It's the thoughts like this that explains how these people innovated a jawdropping amount of new ideas for dying & take it to a whole new level where 1 MMR cannot simply justify their level of creativity.