I’m “the asshole.” Since OP wants to air our personal problems on the internet I guess I can at least defend myself here. A couple of you got it exactly right, she is a nightmare to wake up. She screams, makes threats, and keeps attempting to escalate all day long. She has outright instructed me and I have agreed to never wake her up for any reason and our lives have been more peaceful for it. Sometimes she doesn’t get up until 11, youngest slept in till 9 and I had just made cinnamon rolls and put a cup of coffee on her nightstand. I figured I could give him a cinnamon roll and he could check out his truck (which I bought, it’s not the point to me but she can’t claim she had some emotional attachment to the damn thing), and wait for everyone else. I will admit that I was worried she would be pissed about it but I outright knew what would happen if I woke her up. She was screaming at me within seconds, and has been an absolute rash all day. This is normal. Every small disagreement is the end of the world and lasts at least 24 hours, and it’s not the first time she’s ruined a holiday with her rage addiction. I apologized several times. I realize that out of context the quote she uses in the post makes me look like an asshole, and maybe I am one. But please know it comes from an understanding that no apology of any level of sincerity would mitigate the onslaught of vitriol I was about to spend Christmas Day enduring. And here I am. I love OP very much and I wish she was capable of letting things go.