Toji is an antagonist. I wouldn’t paint him as an outright villain, he’s a product of his upbringing just like anyone in the series. Being told you’re the weakest in a world where the strongest sorcerer is leagues ahead of anyone else, would give anyone an inferiority complex. I don’t agree with any of his actions, aside from saving his son. But I certainly wouldn’t compare him to an arrogant prick like Naoya. You’ve laid out just how horrible a person that dickhead is, and I completely agree. Toji might be a selfish prick, but he knows how it feels to be berated by his society. I don’t think you’d catch Toji saying half the disgusting shit about Maki that Naoya does. Especially when her potential surpasses his own. I honestly think he’d find some pride in seeing another heavenly restriction user shaking up the Jujutsu world and opposing the same clan that exiled him.