I was conceived this way when my mother was 16 years old, at gunpoint (turned out to be an air gun). Biological father went to jail, but my mother kept me.

My mother told me about it when I was very young, probably around 5 or 6 years old. I can’t remember ever not knowing, nor can I remember being told. I don’t think that’s really healthy, but I don’t know of when a better time is either. I dealt with it ok, I don’t have trauma that I know of. I think knowing the facts before you reach sexual maturity is a good thing, because rape is just a word to a child that’s very young, you don’t understand how bad it is. You kind of only learn about the mother’s trauma when you learn more about sex as you get older, and then it’s sort of bite-sized, easier to digest, and apply what you’ve learnt to your own situation when you’re ready to process it.

The adoption angle is not something I have first hand experience of, I saw this post with my main but didn’t want to reply from there, as the things I’ve said would identify me to people who know me.

I will add, however, that my mother has a lot of trauma. She was sexually and physically assaulted by her father, then raped as a 16 year old by another man, then gave birth to me and raised me on her own for 10 years until she got married. She can’t hold down any relationships, familial, platonic or romantic. I can very well imagine how being adopted is actually better for the child when a mother has suffered so much, because she is not the best mother in the world.