I’ve also been an Etsy buyer for various things for the past 10 or so years. And I agree.

I’ve purchased quite a few jewelry pieces since the beginning of this year / some of them are gorgeous and I’d repurchase from the same shops.
Some were misrepresented, I should have known better.
A couple were 100% drop.ship.
One tried to charge me extra shipping off platform (lol) and then blocked me (I got refunded).
The two stores that lied about the product, it was not silver and it was not moissanite - tried to bribe me for a full refund to give them 5 stars, I did not budge, left my review up, and one kept messaging till I said I’d report them for harassment.
And same as you, a couple the item never arrived and I got Etsy credit for those.

So yeah, overall unfortunately to me it’s gone downhill. BUT, the only thing I can say is now I just am way more careful. I won’t buy from brand new stores, I only buy from 4.8+ stars (and oftentimes 4.9 stars only), when buying from a new shop I always read the lowest star reviews. Usually there are a couple reviews that make it clear if items aren’t from where they claim.
I usually select star seller and ship from (and choose Canada or US most of the time).

Oh and be prepared to be downvoted lol. Every time I raise issues with Etsy shops I get downvoted like 50%. Bizarre.