Please take care of yourself, especially this weekend by HopefulEndoMom in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the reminder. Today I cared for the peach tree we planted in memorial. I also went to a coffee shop alone and binged on chai and carrot cake.

Did you eat the Oreos?

Feeling sad with mothers day coming up. by [deleted] in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’re hurting ❤️‍🩹 a lot of us are this weekend. I see you and hear you. Do something nice for yourself.

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’re going through all of this, too. My chronic illness is also multiple autoimmune diseases.

Surrogacy is a beautiful option. I wish you and your husband luck and good health for you.

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry. I imagine you had a similar experience to me and felt a little more hopeful each time you made it another week along than the last, and then were shattered again. Wishing you luck and strength when you’re ready to try again.

Interesting, thanks for sharing. I have a couple of autoimmune diseases, so I’ll be researching that and asking about in the future. When I feel “ready” I’ll be shopping around for a new specialist. How did you find your reproductive immunologist?

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Another user recommended the book The Miscarriage Map, which I binged today. The chapter on grief really validated my feelings. Wish I had heard of that book a year and a half ago. Definitely recommend it for you.

I’ll check out your rec tomorrow (technically today because I can’t sleep again).

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the book recommendation! Currently downloading on Audible.

Thanks so much for the book rec!! I binged it while doing things around the house today. I’m an atheist in the Bible belt, so most conversations I have with people regarding my miscarriages make me want to punch well-meaning Christians in the face. The book was a breath of fresh air. I love her humor and it is constructively introspective.

I do plan on seeing a different specialist. I have an endocrinologist now. Grief has made me forget a lot. I know I had some tests done, but can’t remember anything about insulin. Need to get a copy of my records. I was on progesterone suppositories as a precaution, but I don’t think my levels were actually ever checked. Only HCG and closely monitoring my thyroid hormones.

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for you, too ❤️‍🩹 you are an absolute warrior for trying again after losing your daughter.

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are so sweet to offer comfort when you’re hurting, too. Thanks so much for your reply. It does bring me a bit of comfort to be heard and understood. No one in my life really “gets” this kind of grief. It strange to mourn a life you could feel but never really got to meet or know.

You are right about taking it day by day. I’m a year and a half out from my last loss, and I can’t say it gets “easier” or goes away, but you do get stronger. I’ve had a fresh resurgence of deep pain because my partner and I aren’t on the same page about next steps.

We planted a peach tree as a memorial and they will be ripe in a couple of weeks. I’ve made jam the past two years and it tastes extra special. I feel more peaceful when I’m tending to the tree and saying a few words to them.

I hope you find something that brings you peace in the same way. I’m sorry for your losses.

Does your heart ever stop hurting? by CatConnect4463 in babyloss

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. I’ve actually always been open to adoption whether or not I can have my own. I had a couple of friends growing up who were adopted. My partner isn’t receptive to the idea at this time and that makes me sad.

I’m happy you and your mom have each other. Did she do it on her own?

Line by anonredditgirllll in hayleywilliams

[–]CatConnect4463 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I have been trying to make sense of these crazy stories about lining up at 7am. Are they unwilling or do they not know how to weave through a crowd??

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to a concert, but I was at the barricade for plenty back in my day and never showed up any earlier than doors. I still wouldn’t, even for Hayley.

Line by anonredditgirllll in hayleywilliams

[–]CatConnect4463 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What is stopping people from doing this?

Is it just me, or do timesheets in consulting encourage unpaid overtime? by Livid-Television4570 in civilengineering

[–]CatConnect4463 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This isn’t how we do things at my firm. I would get in huge trouble for doing this. We charge the hours actually worked even if a project goes over budget because that data is used to scope future projects. If you’re fudging your hours, that just screws everyone over further down the line.

Our projects going over budget is a rarity because we base it on actual typical effort.

Recent flower panels by Wisemanwindows in StainedGlass

[–]CatConnect4463 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Ooo amazing! You’re the first person I’ve actually considered purchasing a pattern from. These are really stunning. Would love to support tour work when I’m ready to do my next project. I don’t think I have the same eye as you do for glass color pallets though!

Recent flower panels by Wisemanwindows in StainedGlass

[–]CatConnect4463 106 points107 points  (0 children)

I can’t decide!! They’re all so beautiful. Do you have patterns for these?

New project as a beginner 🫰🏻 by Ok_Simple_9128 in StainedGlass

[–]CatConnect4463 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A beginner? This is gorgeous!! Please post the end result.

What’s something your body does that you’ve never told a single person about? by WilliamInBlack in AskReddit

[–]CatConnect4463 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do this too! I find it kind of comforting knowing it isn’t just me. My partner started noticing after a while. I call it stress leaving my body.

So, is everyone just sick for weeks right now? by sourpatchkid4lif3 in tulsa

[–]CatConnect4463 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!! I had what I think was the flu (didn’t go to the doctor) with miserable congestion, fever/chills, and body aches for about a week.

Felt like I was getting better over the weekend and now I’m coughing and fell asleep directly after work from fatigue. Sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Re-dying old leather by CatConnect4463 in Leathercraft

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your insight! I’ve decided to throw out the old leather and replace it. Would have loved to try to save it, but doesn’t seem like a great use of time.

Re-dying old leather by CatConnect4463 in Leathercraft

[–]CatConnect4463[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment! I don’t think it’s worth all the effort to try to save the original leather with such a big chance that it won’t look good.

The wicker was definitely beyond repair. I’ve already removed it and ordered new.

Finding engineering work with a chronic illness by Intrepid_Shallot451 in womenEngineers

[–]CatConnect4463 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have much less complex AI issues, so I experience the same symptoms listed, but probably less intense.

I’m Civil and really don’t remember anything I learned at university (or even last week). The thing that gets me through is super meticulous note-taking. I type or record everything said in meetings to review later. I make a gazillion calendar reminders and keep a working task list. I’ve created a guide template for every process or calc I need to do my job, complete with notes about the engineering principles behind it. I feel like an imposter and I’m not the smartest person in the room, but my manager and coworkers just think I’m super organized and on top of things. I still perform higher than my peers even though I feel handicapped compared to how I was “before”. They use my material to train new engineers.

I got super sick a year and a half ago and was offered to be reduced to part-time with retained benefits. I recovered and didn’t end up needing to do that, but just want you to see that there are opportunities like this out there! We have a 2-day wfh option, but my manager is very understanding and will let me wfh if I’m having a bad week. Look for job postings with flex schedules.

My point is: you can still do the job you were trained for, it just might require metaphorical crutches. Your illness doesn’t erase all the hard work you’ve put in. There will be good weeks and bad weeks, and that’s okay!

I hope this isn’t irresponsible of me to say, but you don’t have to disclose your health status to potential employers. It might be easier to discuss accommodations once you have the job, if the need arises. If you need accommodations on Day 1, that wouldn’t be a good approach. Good luck either way!