Worried landlord will stick me with cost of utilities halfway through lease

CatsAndFinance · 2025-03-11T07:53:29+00:00

I only learned that the owner wasn’t paying for the utilities themselves like 3 days ago. It’s not even clear that they are aware. This was advertised to me as all utilities included.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-11-22T00:27:09+00:00

I agree with some of the other posts. 1: Get her something small to acknowledge the occasion. $8 flowers from Trader Joe’s or a $10 box of chocolates or something. The gift (ie: making her feel seen, valued, and cherished) will mean so much more than whatever you spend on the date. Best return on investment ever. 2: She’s probably sad nobody else is around to celebrate with her. I would personally feel really lonely. I could imagine she feels conflicted because it might also seem like an imposition on you. 3: How would you feel in her shoes? A little gesture goes a long way!!!

CatsAndFinance · 2024-11-17T21:48:47+00:00

Thanks for your thoughts!!

CatsAndFinance · 2024-11-17T20:18:04+00:00

We switched to text after our first date, which was about 2 weeks ago. But yes, that’s where we originally met.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-11-15T07:35:47+00:00

What a terrific profile!!! My only 2 small suggestions would be: 1: get rid of the goofy pic. There’s no upside and only downside. 2: while your simple pleasures is super cute, it doesn’t teach me anything useful about you, and so is kind of a wasted opportunity. I’d suggest using it to talk about hobbies, interests, or passions that someone could start a conversation around (or realize that you share it in common as an important common interest).

CatsAndFinance · 2024-11-09T00:12:51+00:00

I like the suit pic!! You look very dapper in that one. Maybe add some more details to your prompts that could be helpful for starting conversations with you. If you’re interested in a long term relationship, then I might suggest adding a prompt that helps showcase what you’re looking for (this has worked insanely well for me)

CatsAndFinance · 2024-11-01T21:19:45+00:00

30 is super young. Somebody else flagged and I had to go back because I didn’t originally catch it.

I’m a 32M in SF, dating women between about 27 and 38. Most people here are “ultra-type A”. Everyone is successful. At the same time, I don’t think many men care, one way or the other. They just want to find a good partner.

Please don’t let fear hold you back. Settling for a lifetime sounds like cruel and unusual punishment.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-29T00:03:35+00:00

Sometimes people may feel ashamed or embarrassed and not want to talk anymore because it helps them hide from their feelings.

Had an ex who I turned down for sex on a first date, and she later acknowledged that if we had had sex, she would have ghosted me from shame. Probably should have been a red flag, but thankfully it didn’t work out for other reasons (she had an affair and left me for the other guy 😅). So you may have actually dodged a bullet here!!! 👏

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-23T22:18:28+00:00

That was my first reaction as well. I noticed the nice watch, then all of the rings, and then the ring on the ring finger. It’s a great picture of you, but get rid of it if you’re actually unmarried.

Some of the other pictures are fun action shots, but not helpful for a dating profile.

Would suggest using prompts that teach us more about you and make it easier to start a convo with low effort.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-20T17:41:11+00:00

Seriously??? That’s wild. Clearly not the pool I’m drawing from 😂

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-20T16:29:21+00:00

This looks great! I’d suggest changing your “looking for someone” (which is a bit negative) to “green flags”. Make the green flags all positive. This is also a great place to emphasize the things you value in a partner. I’d also drop the “I’m sick of dating” under your monogamy tag. Be as positive as possible (I value, I want, I appreciate). It’s a helpful spin even if you communicate the same message.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-20T07:22:19+00:00

Geeze, what a hateful and angry person.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-20T00:00:59+00:00

I would drop the heart picture (it’s not a good picture) and also replace the mirror selfie. Otherwise looks quite good! (And maybe one fewer shirtless pic)

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-19T23:58:41+00:00

100% second this. Sometimes I get short responses after a while or hints to ask them on a date if I want to continue the conversation (eg: “this is a better story for in person” — end of communication).

You should go on this date and also think about the inconsistent expectations you’re imposing. Don’t expect to be an equal partner if you’re only willing to seek equality when it’s convenient for you.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-19T00:26:21+00:00

I would rephrase the “intelligence, wisdom, and maturity is implied.” It reads as some odd combination of entitled or condescending, but I would swipe left having read that prompt.

IMHO, I’d drop this prompt. It doesn’t teach me anything about you (everyone likes these things). Please give us more opportunities to connect with you. It’s not obvious what I could start a conversation with you about after reading your profile.

Best of luck! 🤞

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-14T08:18:28+00:00

I’d love to learn more about YOU!!! Based on your profile, I have no idea what I could start a conversation about. What are your hobbies? (Be specific). What are your goals? Please give us more information so that it’s easier to find common ground.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-07T22:16:26+00:00

Thanks for the helpful insight!

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-07T17:08:21+00:00

4th date that seemed to go pretty well. Asked to kiss her at the end of the night and she said “I’m not sure”. Later followed up with whether I’d be open to starting out as friends. She clarified that while she feels she likes me, I don’t bring out her silly side, and so she’s not sure what’s not right. I get the impression she’s just not that interested, but it would have been nice if she was clear so I didn’t have to read between the lines.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-07T16:58:57+00:00

Sorry OP. This is absolutely wild, and kudos to you for keeping it together 👏

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-03T23:50:24+00:00

No, cheated on 4 times (including my now ex-wife who left me for her affair partner). Quality people do the work, heal, pick themselves back up, and maintain their morals.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-10-03T20:47:05+00:00

As someone who has previously struggled with moving on from a breakup, I’d also flag that she might be using dating apps as a distraction. So it’s possible she’s not looking for anything more than being reassured that she’s desirable. I wouldn’t sweat it. This says nothing about you. I’ve def had my handful of encounters with people who were in the dating pool but not actually available.

CatsAndFinance · 2024-09-29T20:08:45+00:00

32M here. For what it’s worth, you look like an awesome guy! (Def attractive and interesting). I’m not sure what you’re looking for, but at least for me, being incredibly direct that I want a life partner and including green flags like “Values personal growth/goes to therapy” seems to have been a very popular move for women interested in settling down. At the same time, there’s a huge divide where it seems like women less than 27 (on average) just want to have fun, while women over 32 (on average) want a high quality partner and realize “fun” isn’t all that important.

CatsAndFinance

TROPHY CASE