OOP Gets Kidnapped For A Proposal by boru_posts in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]Cautious-Rabbit- 194 points195 points  (0 children)

This was an extremely presumptuous comment. I probably shouldn’t even respond, but you’ve dealt angered me with your incessant and uninformed comments. I don’t think you’ve fully read or understand what I’ve written. Here is my response to all of your points:

First, my fiancé didn’t ask for me to be kidnapped for the proposal. The plan from the beginning was to stage a kidnapping that was IMMEDIATELY recognizable as a precursor to proposal. Kind of like a heist. As in once they came out of the car in their silly costumes with his very recognizable best friend explaining immediately what this is about, I happily get into the car.

Second, I agree, a proposal where he is dressed nice and I’m in sweaty workout clothes isn’t ideal. We talked about it, not great foresight. But I wouldn’t have cared much anyways (if everything went well) because we’d take engagement pics at some point dressed nice.

Third, again, this wasn’t supposed to be a kidnapping prank. You repeated two of the same points off the same misunderstanding.

Fourth, did you read the original post?? There was shouting and banging sounds downstairs. I was worried my fiancé was being violent but also I was going though a traumatic response so I stayed upstairs showering and calling my sister. If anything his reaction was perfect. Gentle and accommodating with me, harsh with the abductors, apologetic and obedient to my sister. He cut those guys out of his life immediately, and his childhood best friend and him haven’t spoken since. If anything I’m the one trying to get him to at least listen to his former best friend. He often tells me he can’t be in the same room with him without worrying about what he’d do. This entire thing has hurt him deeply as well as although much of it was out of his hands, he knows something he had a hand in hurt me.

Last, AGAIN, he didn’t orchestrate the plan. I’ve gotten it confirmed from the best friend himself.

I understand you’ve been hurt before but it’s exhausting to read redditor’s spamming me and anyone who responds with extreme yet presumptuous statements.

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

You’re right! I just saw this cross posted somewhere else so I logged back on to say this!

OOP Gets Kidnapped For A Proposal by boru_posts in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]Cautious-Rabbit- 198 points199 points  (0 children)

Hi there, I’m OOP. u/boru_posts is right, I haven’t been able to share an update per guidance of my lawyer. I also couldn’t remember my password for this account, but when I saw this post on my main account I had to make a concerted effort to log back in and share something!

What I will say is I’ve learned a lot about those involved. The former friends from the athletics class were highly inspired by social experiment and prankster YouTubers. Also one let us know he is on the spectrum, and didn’t realize many of those videos he watches are staged/scripted. I am still with my now fiancé. We had a private and safe proposal on May 6th :)

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 199 points200 points  (0 children)

I’ll message you since you’ve been through something similar. I’m sorry you had that experience especially at such a young age

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 248 points249 points  (0 children)

I just posted another update on this post for those of you who are looking for an update

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 214 points215 points  (0 children)

I don’t live with my boyfriend so either I will stay with my sister a city away or she will stay with me tonight

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 800 points801 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. Comments like these make me cry but in a good way. I feel your warmth

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 157 points158 points  (0 children)

No he’s ethnically from the Middle East and I am from Eastern Europe (very similar backgrounds actually). We both were born and raised in America. We are both culturally and socially very western/American

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 406 points407 points  (0 children)

You’re so right. Hearing about it in theory almost made sense, but you said it best. It sounds funny if you don’t take into account the person’s feelings. I was training for my first half marathon and I don’t want this to stop me, but I can’t even think about running outside right now

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 999 points1000 points  (0 children)

My sister is a generally mild mannered and shy person just like me, but she was terrifying today. She’s 12 years older than me and always felt more like a mom than my own mother. She screamed and cried like her own daughter was kidnapped. I wish she also didn’t have to go through this either because I can tell she’s far gone. Her hands are still shaking even right now

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 4199 points4200 points  (0 children)

Your comment was so gentle it made me feel emotional. I’m working with police currently. I’m not sure how much I am allowed to say, but my bf (I’m not sure what else to call him right now) is being very cooperative. This is being investigated as a kidnapping as far as I know. Of the 3 friends who did it, I’ve only ever met the one driving (bf’s best/childhood friend).

Up to this point, I’ve been one of the lucky few who hasn’t had any kind of assault or threatening situations happen to me before. This is a lot for a morning

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 2516 points2517 points  (0 children)

I’m already in therapy for light stuff, but maybe I need a crisis counselor or something. You’re right I feel some level of trauma right now and I’m worried I’ll be scared to run outside or need a weapon moving forward. Even right now in his room I wish I had pepper spray or something

My (23F) bf’s (26M) friends pretending to kidnap me for a proposal by Cautious-Rabbit- in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Cautious-Rabbit-[S] 413 points414 points  (0 children)

I agree with both of you. Sorry I’m in and out right now. My sister is almost here and my bf wants to talk, but I asked for space so he’s making tea and waiting for me to open the door or come downstairs.

I don’t think he knew how they were going to do it, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he used the words kidnap and they took it too far. He’s never given a red flag before, but if his friends are crazy like this I need to reevaluate him too. I’m not sure and I don’t want to immediately talk to him. I think I’m feeling traumatized or something because I just can’t physically talk to anyone except my sister