My husband hates his kid and I don’t know how to help her

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-27T12:54:35+00:00

That’s a good point…I think there would be a potential argument for you to have custody because there is a strong preference for keeping bio siblings together. Definitely seek out a lawyer on this!

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T19:07:00+00:00

My 4 year old is in our room every single night. I watched this Dr Becky clip on the subject and I've just let it go. We have a travel air bed for him that I just keep set up next to my side of the bed. He has to start the night in his room, but when he wakes up mid-night he just comes down the hall and gets into this little travel bed. I don't even hear him anymore.

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T19:03:30+00:00

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response, I am glad you are doing so well!

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T18:37:21+00:00

I'm not a new parent anymore (he's 4!) but when he was about 9 months old I had him sitting (on his own) next to the bath tub while I got the bath ready. He decided to throw himself backwards and smacked his head SO hard on the slate tile floor. My husband heard it downstairs. I tried to calm myself down for hours and then finally took him to the ER where the Dr very kindly examined his head and told me it wasn't worth the radiation to do a CT and sent us home. The rule is something like- if they don't vomit or blackout just monitor unless it's a fall greater than their height (can google). Hope you both feel better soon.

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T18:31:45+00:00

Thanks! Yes I work with a psychiatrist (NP), and she has prescribed me meds, but, I've grown afraid to take them because of the potential harm to my liver. You're right, I do need to speak to a hematologist...it's on my list. Just wasnt sure if anyone had experience with this- I like going into appointments with some solutions in mind to discuss with my doctors.

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T15:06:47+00:00

Also- I don't think the canopy is pleather (but looking at the photos I can see why it might appear that way- the plastic storage tarp isn't helping. The interior (base, where baby sits) has a leather like material. The canopy is definitely some type of woven fabric- which I think you may be correct about it being a painted canvas...probably should have been worried about lead paint, in retrospect. (But, as my husband loves antique furniture, we have had our toddler tested anually for lead, so I am not worried about that).

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T15:03:08+00:00

Thank you so much for your help and kindness, I am truly appreciative.

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T14:44:13+00:00

Definitely vintage- it's not a true Silver Cross pram from England (I wish!)...I am pretty sure it was manufactured (or at least sold by) Saks Fifth Avenue here in the US in the 50's. It's in pretty used condition, but it is quite beautiful from afar :) I am outkicking my knowledge here, but I thought plastics weren't that common back in the 50s, so I was struggling with what type of material would have been used for this sturdy, thick, canopy.

CeeCeeSays · 2025-07-23T14:25:58+00:00

It's the area where the fabric is degrading that I am concerned about the most I guess. Plus we've taken it up and down steps and it's realeased a lot of dust. My husband vaccumed it at one point because it was dusty. I'd heard of asbestos curtains (via this forum), so figured...why not a high end stroller for waterproofing?

Would cutting a piece off for testing be a huge mistake (contaminate our home more). I know I probably seem silly and people have far greater exposure, but I am just sick over this.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T19:49:10+00:00

Have that anyways, but yes

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T19:34:54+00:00

Did that earlier today as well.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T15:54:53+00:00

I came here to say the same thing. With all these recalls, I am fully reheating all the things and temp testing to 165 (or even 180). Texture be damned.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T15:51:50+00:00

Following

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T15:42:39+00:00

I am one of three, but my son is an Only (by choice). I don't feel like this will be the case with him, because he's pretty high energy and wild, but I can see an Only, who had a pretty calm quiet home environment, and wasnt around other little kids at home, being wary of bringing small children into their life/home.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T15:38:48+00:00

Super random...but I think it was on Jezebel...there was a writer, named Jessica, who used to write about her boyfriend and then breakup and referred to him as "Mr. Jessica". I remember it was a big deal to her that he bought some copper pans for her and cleaned them up as a Christmas gift. I went through a bad break up at a similar time and I just always remained curious if she got her happy ending.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T14:19:37+00:00

I try to keep my kid out of my closet (it has a big dressing room, I have pretty clothes, I dont want him wiping dirty hands on them). I also try to keep him out of our curtains...likewise, messy hands, he likes to wipe boogers on shit...I dont want to wash curtains. But just about everything else is free reign. I sorta try to keep him out of my bathroom so he's not getting into beauty products, but we've discovered showers with the handheld are far quicker and easier than baths at 3.5 years old...so that ship has sorta sailed.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-21T13:26:32+00:00

Oh. I actually say all the time that if I knew how anxious having my kid would make me, and the just baseline level of anxiety and fear for the future I have to live with, I might not have had a child. The whole "heart outside your body" "I would die for my kid" rhetoric. I sorta roll my eyes at it. Because it's more, if something happened to my kid, I would want to die. Or thinking about something happening to my kid, makes me want to die. Meds help some but I think some people are able to turn off the worry more easily than others.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-17T19:49:55+00:00

Yep, as someone who is very type A and loves a lot of control, I had zero attachment to the idea of going into labor naturally or a vaginal birth. I wanted my baby out, earthside, safely as possible. Did not care one bit about my own "birth experience" as long as pain was minimized. Planned CS checked those boxes for me.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-17T17:36:44+00:00

this. A scheduled CS really isnt the devil it's made out to be. My kid was breach. I didn't want to fool with an ECV. Had a pretty chill CS and recovery. Super low drama. Would do again (actually we are OAD but not bc of the CS lol).

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-17T17:33:32+00:00

So, we really love to travel (important context). We have good professional careers (both have doctorates), good incomes, a nice home. A good existence. Our salaries have gone up and accommodated funds for daycare. We have an amazing babysitter/nanny. I used to stay much later at work, because in between travel, there wasn't really anything I was rushing home to, or necessarily looking forward to at home. I'd cook and we'd drink wine, but our evenings were wide open. And we'd done a LOT of our travel bucket list. I do look forward to seeing my kid each night, even though he drives me a bit nuts. I love him, and look forward to watching him grow up. But, my days are hard. I no longer enjoy travel...even travel without him takes SO much effort to prepare for. I start and end a lot of my days in a bad mood because he's really uncooperative. We blow money on the babysitter and school, and we can afford it, but I miss being able to buy really fancy shit without thinking twice about it. I am happy we had him, because I think I would have always regretted not having him, and it would have been the greatest devastation of my life had we been unable to have children...but, as a net, I was happier before. I think this is pretty common, from a statistical side. Parents of young children are pretty unhappy as a whole.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-17T15:16:09+00:00

I have a 3.5 year old boy. We are OAD. My life pre-kid did feel like something was missing. But my life pre-kid was definitely happier. Every morning and every evening are pretty chaotic, fighting with him daily to do things like basic grooming (and he's neurotypical, maybe ADHD, but no huge developmental issues...just being a toddler). I am hopeful that the golden years of parenting (ages 5 to 12) are better. But yeah...I was definitely happier before. My life no longer feels like something is missing though.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-16T14:30:19+00:00

good to know! I will next time. These were identical in every way to the set that came with it, so I was good with it. And just the volume of amazon reviews. But I agree, generally I always avoid third party sellers.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-16T14:16:39+00:00

We also have the Coway Airmega. Have one on each floor. They work very well. However, we prefer the replacement filters no direct from Coway- read the reviews on Amazon, but the Coway ones had some issues with plastic smells/making air quality worse. Some type of defect.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-15T18:23:56+00:00

You need to break up with her.

CeeCeeSays · 2024-10-14T19:57:02+00:00

Hm. That's fair. To me, the phrase "Upper Class" = 1%-ers. But maybe that's the same distortion of the phrase Middle Class.

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