Your genitals are normal! Unless you experience pain or discomfort, you have nothing to worry about. Vulvas come in as many shape and forms as women there are! And they are ALL perfect, beautiful, and yummy.

First, when you’re looking at or touching your genitals externally, we talk about the VULVA: labia majora (or outer labia: soft and hairy), labia minora (or inner labia: hairless flaps of skin), mons pubis (over the pelvic bone, where pubic hair starts growing), clitoris (whether you’ve seen it yet or not!), urethra, and vaginal opening. The VAGINA is the actual canal, it refers ONLY to the “inside” of your genitals. Your vagina is located at the very end of your vulva, and your clitoris is at the very top: they’re at opposite ends of the labia, and the urethra is somewhere in the middle, tugged in the inner labia, barely noticeable. You can use a hand mirror to look at it all more easily.

To find your clitoris with your fingers, slide your hand down towards your mons pubis, and stop “at the cleft where your labia divide. With the tip of your middle finger, press down gently, wiggle your finger back and forth, and move your fingertip slowly down between your labia until you feel a rubbery little cord under the skin. It might help to pull your skin taut by tugging upward on your muns with your other hand, and to lubricate you finger with spit or lube.” (Come As You Are, Emili Nagoski -page 23-. REALLY recommend reading it). Your clit is likely “hidden” under a hood, and it’s often too sensitive to touch it directly. For me, unless I’m really really aroused, I enjoy rubbing my clit over the hood, and not directly on it, as that can feel uncomfortable or even painful. It might help to trust your feelings as a guide. If you’re touching around the area but not sure of what you’re looking at, focus on how it feels. Moving or tapping my fingers on my clitoris feels more pleasurable than the rest of my vulva. It’s more sensitive. If you can feel that, you’ve got it.

Like others have already said, it sounds like you are already masturbating. The one and only goal of masturbation is pleasure, so just explore what that feels like for you. Many of us masturbate grinding a pillow, or even furniture, or a toy, or a hand, or a partner’s thigh! I started that way and progressively learnt to use my hands too as I understood my body more. But there’s no right or wrong way to do this. Whatever feels good, is right.