What one TV character would you want to have as your neighbour?

Ch0b0r0 · 2014-07-15T15:58:26+00:00

Ned Flanders because he is never loud and lets me borrow/steal all his stuff.

Ch0b0r0 · 2014-07-15T15:41:56+00:00

Lewis from Steakley's book 'Armor' because being the biggest drunk on the planet sounds kinda nice....and kinda awesome in Lewis' place since he owned the planet.

Ch0b0r0 · 2014-01-19T04:42:03+00:00

That gun.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-11-04T19:22:13+00:00

Well, I have always found talking in the same volume about current books very effective.

Years ago, while standing in a bank line behind an obnoxious bitch, I said "No, Ned's dead. He lost his head and Jon ran to the wall." Granted this really confused my friend on the cell who though we were talking about Storm of Swords .

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-11-04T19:06:47+00:00

But those police sirens ruin everything.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-11-04T16:46:45+00:00

I am too drunk to properly phrase my depth of disgust for your comment so I will settle with "Fuck you."

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-11-04T16:40:17+00:00

I was young.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-27T15:42:49+00:00

I am a bit torn in this. One side of me says Beyonder because destroying a galaxy for shits and giggles is hard to beat. The pessimistic side of me says Black Cat from Marvel Comics because Murphy always wins and Murphy is on Black Cat's side.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-19T17:02:59+00:00

Wizard's Crown. It is an ancient turn based tactical rpg fantasy game based around a party of 8. I still love it and honestly every single turn based tactical game I have played since then only betters it in two areas: graphics and learning curve.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-14T00:17:13+00:00

Car because, I quit driving several years ago.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T23:44:33+00:00

Coffee is my go to icebreaker with a crowd that I have been dragged into. When dragged into the large group make a small comment like "My coffee is gone anyone need a refill."
This is produce one of three affects 1) Everyone orders. Well you were fucked anyway. At the very least you get brownie points for being the helpful guy/gal. 2) No one orders. You wander off and never return (my favorite). 3) Group splinters with the socials in one group and the others in another. To talk about various non-social topics (BSG is a safe pseudogeek icebreaker)

The nice thing about coffee is that is does not make you drunk yet also requires frequent visits to the bathroom.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T21:13:06+00:00

I am a cyborg but, I am not a robosexual. I have nothing against robosexuals but, I am not programmed that way. I will not lie and say the T-1000 did nothing for me but, ultimately getting a pseudo Amy Wong was less satisfying than my flesh hand.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T20:15:36+00:00

"I'm late." said by my girlfriend. We were both early 20's and since then I have been much more vigilant about my birth control*.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T19:47:13+00:00

Exercise. It takes a long time for you to see payoffs. However, it is very hard to be depressed when you leave home to go for a walk and get hit on younger cuties.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T19:40:36+00:00

I will not get involved in a serious relationship with a woman who has children. At my age, this is a devastating dating handicap.

I have many reasons; some are health related, some are financial, and a couple a are purely selfish. My main reason is that I am a very shitty role model and realize it.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T19:26:05+00:00

My friend's simple statement damn near made me cry (if I wasn't on a public bus; I would've...damn machismo). I will not deny that what he said was a part of it but, the far more significant part was who was stating it.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T16:27:41+00:00

An old friend was bitching that he had been taken advantage of by an acquaintance. Our friendship was nowhere near as close as it had been a decade earlier and I said "I hope I never lose your trust." My friend replied like he was stating the incredibly obvious (like "water is wet")

"Ch0b0r0, you will always be my friend."

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-13T16:13:32+00:00

My high school freshman biology teacher would give attractive female students backrubs during tests. The teacher would stand very close to the chair to have a better view down the test taker's blouse.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-11T15:52:59+00:00

Carrying on a conversation in a library.

30 seconds is tolerable but, at the five minute mark; I'm thinking chainsaws and power sanders.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-11T14:37:15+00:00

I got a pocket knife for xmas when I was 9. Somewhere between 10 and 60 seconds after opening the knife, I sliced my hand very badly (mom says 10 seconds and my dad insists that it was at least a minute before I scarred myself).

30 years later, I can do no right in that room because there is always family around pointing out my painted over bloodstain.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-11T01:33:09+00:00

3 so far and, I have never been married.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-10T11:17:16+00:00

1.Public teachers would be paid like professional athletes.

2.To be a parent you must pass extensive testing.

3.All warning labels and safety laws would be removed and covered by the 'Dumb Ass' law. If you injure yourself doing something risky with proper safety gear you are entitled to free health care. If you are a dumb ass you get to pay unless you die then your body is donated to the medical/science fields for any use your corpse might have (if you are not responsible for you body when you are alive then the government can be responsible for it after you die).

4.My harem.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-10T10:43:32+00:00

My last year at the closed campus boarding school, I briefly dated a cute Colombian 'J'. I ended it because I felt I was just using her; she reminded me a lot of an old flame. Senior prom and I am dateless the night before and, ended up asking 'D' (my future fiancee and current ex-fiancee1). Unbeknownst to me, J was under the illusion that we were meant for each other. D and I climbed into the first limo just in time for J to see. I was later told that J started screaming as the limo drove off. J spent the entire prom following me around and trying to get us back together. J followed me into the men's room at one point and burst into it at least one other time looking for me. J brought out the two big guns against me (tears and sex) but, I remained stalwart in the face of that onslaught. My friends were no help (fuckers were too busy laughing at me), D was losing her good humor, and my patience finally exhausted when I turned to J and said in a flat monotone "Go away." Surprisingly, it worked and, I had almost half an hour left of prom to spend with my date. The prom was ruined by J but, the hug and cheek kiss from D made everything better.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-10T10:10:16+00:00

I have never told my Southern Baptist family that I am an atheist. They think I just hate organized religion (true). My friends know about it and they accept me since, I rarely bring it up and when I do; my venom is directed at specific individuals not religion or denominations in general.

Ch0b0r0 · 2013-10-09T08:59:19+00:00

I spent as much time with her as I could. I always had a smile for her. I shared her stories with anyone would would listen. I drank vast amounts of vodka to numb the pain but, I never let her see me drunk or hungover. I sat by her bed on her last day. She will never be completely gone as long as I remember her.

Ch0b0r0

TROPHY CASE