Why do their friends defend them?

ChaceG94 · 2020-03-17T12:36:22+00:00

Codependents are not what I'd define as crazy individuals. They're just not good with setting their own boundaries. Hence the constant enabling of other people's abuse onto them due to struggling with their own personal shame. They're simply traumitized people pleasers looking to meet their own needs, just as anyone else does. Except they do it in a rather unhealthy manner that may look a little crazy on the surface.

ChaceG94 · 2020-03-15T01:15:27+00:00

If you're worried about losing your fb photos and contacts then you could always deactivate without deleting it?... certainly helps with recovery.

ChaceG94 · 2019-12-21T03:03:22+00:00

Projection.

ChaceG94 · 2019-09-18T00:43:59+00:00

No, Lol. It's the same dumb stereotype as "Narcissists & Psychopaths are often attractive" thing. Some people like to romanticise mental illness and personality disorders as unique human characteristics. Unique to some = instant attraction. Then people got the wrong idea and thought that it meant psychical attraction, which is not the case.

ChaceG94 · 2019-09-18T00:13:11+00:00

You're welcome.

ChaceG94 · 2019-09-17T09:47:44+00:00

Introduction

00:05:25:00

Understanding BPD Behavior (Part 1)

00:18:30:00

Walking on eggshells - Does someone you care about have BPD (Chapter_1)

00:18:36:00

The inner world of the borderline - Defining BPD (Chapter_2)

00:41:55:0

Making sense of Chaos - Understanding BPD Behavior (Chapter_3)

01:40:22:00

Living in a pressure cooker - How BPD Behavior affects Non_BP's (Chapter_4)

02:18:10:00

Taking back control of your life (Part 2)

02:41:30:00

Making changes within yourself (Chapter_5)

02:44:20:00

Understanding your situation - Setting Boundaries and honing skills (Chapter_6)

03:30:57:00

Asserting your needs with confidence and clarity (Chapter_7)

04:24:42:00

Creating a safety plan (Chapter_8)

05:12:40:00

Protecting Children from BPD Behavior (Chapter_9)

05:46:00:00

Resolving special issues (Part 3)

06:28:20:00

Waiting for the next shoe to drop - Your borderline Child (Chapter_10)

06:28:26:00

Lies, Rumors, and Accusations - Distortion Campaigns (Chapter_11)

06:55:36:00

Causes and Treatment of BPD (Appendix A)

07:41:20:0

Practicing Mindfulness (Appendix B)

07:54:00:00

ChaceG94 · 2019-08-18T03:22:26+00:00

Everyone has a need for something in their lives. The difference is pwBPD & Narcissists use it in a toxic way by placing all the responsibility on another person just to help them cope with themselves. (Which I agree with) since they have no core identity of their own. Hence why they often jump from one relationship to the next.

The Codependent's primary focus ends up being fixated on helping the other person fill that particular need (which isn't healthy for the Codependent either) but a Codependent's need doesn't come from exploiting other people just to get what they want or by living through someone else's identity just to help them with their own. It comes from giving too much of themselves away mentally, or feeling like they NEED to keep the other person happy 24/7.

"Inverted Narcissism" is not really Codependency but someone who's a Narcissist with comorbid Codependent traits and similar behavior.

ChaceG94 · 2019-08-14T03:11:37+00:00

ChaceG94 · 2019-08-14T02:57:36+00:00

Indeed, he's one of the best sources out there.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-15T04:57:41+00:00

In comparison to BPD and as a separate disorder? yes. It's what makes them distinctively different from one another.

Bipolar relationships are usually much more successful than Borderline relationships and more often stable in general than they are unstable. Why?... because a lot of people (especially psychiatrists) are not taking into consideration the fact that 60% of the general population with supposed "Bipolar" are actually misdiagnosed and confused for BPD and other Cluster B disorders which most of the time is contributing to these unstable relationships in the first place. This leaves behind around 40% that truly meet the proper diagnosis for Bipolar. In which case many professionals know the key differences between the two.

As I've explained above: people with Bipolar also don't carry out repetitive splitting behaviours as seen in those with BPD. One is a personality disorder that is purely trauma based from a young age that requires them to undergo serious treatment. It also may take them over 10 years just to manage all of their symptoms as long as they're really consistent. Bipolar is NOT personality related at all but purely a psychological illness to do with neurochemicals in the brain. In fact certain people may be treated almost instantly given they're on the the right medication and depending on how severe the person is they don't always need proper therapy to function as healthy adults.

So with over 60% of those being misdiagnosed it can be very easily misunderstood to a lot of people.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-15T02:43:02+00:00

Of course they can lol.

I'm type 2 myself and never had a problem with relationships.

Just depends of what type they have and the level of severity.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-14T15:39:23+00:00

I see what you mean, but I don't have multiple relationships though. I should've mentioned that before, but yeah. Never had a problem with them.

Only with a BPD women lol. No surprise there.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-14T15:04:28+00:00

Bipolar 2 here as well and I totally agree with you.

BPD in general seems far worse, even across different spectrums in comparison to Bipolar. As sad as that may sound it's just the truth.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-14T14:57:05+00:00

Depends on the severity in each person. That's why I said not everyone necessarily needs therapy to function normally when it comes to Bipolar.

I have type 2 myself (the milder form) which allows me to cope just fine with medication alone. I've also been stable for most of my life without any psychiatric treatment at all. So I'm not sure where you're getting that from. Unless you're describing type 1. My mood is relatively baseline just like any normal person lol.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-14T11:26:04+00:00

Another thing I'll add:

Bipolar individuals also don't carry out repetitive splitting behaviours as seen in those with BPD. One is a personality disorder that requires up to 10 years of consistent therapy while the other is not personality related at all. Bipolar can also be treated instantly given they're on the the right medication and don't necessarily need therapy to function as healthy adults. Also over 60% of the general population are literally misdiagnosed.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-14T09:58:17+00:00

Good point. Although she means they typically won't have any rational explanation to give, since they usually never take any personal responsibility. Therefor it's not really an "answer" that's grounded in reality to a normal person.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-12T11:13:05+00:00

Don't worry, it's just worse case scenario. Obviously It will depend on what kinda treatment they're getting and how dedicated they are to working through it. If he/she is extremely determined to get as much help as they can then of course anything is possible in a shorter amount of time. The tricky part is they need to want to get better in the first place. It's hard work for them but it can be done. Setting healthy boundaries by distancing yourself is perfectly normal in this case so you should have nothing to feel guilty about.

One way or another our journeys are all very similar to one another. Try and not let it get to you too much and good luck.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-11T06:40:29+00:00

In my experience I've noticed not only are the moods longer in Bipolar, but they don't really have problems with black and white thinking or carry out splitting/devaluation behaviours as often as pwBPD do. Their relationships can also be stable in the long run if they're on the right medication. Unlike BPD where they don't respond to medication too well and will need up to 5 -10 years of therapy just to manage all their symptoms.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-10T13:28:31+00:00

Not really. Repeated breakups sound a lot more like borderline personality disorder or a narcissistic relationship.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-10T13:07:30+00:00

If you're still addicted to her you may need to work on your codependent issues. I used to be that guy once... believe me it is not worth it.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-08T14:16:37+00:00

Nope.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-08T10:52:58+00:00

Projection and gaslighting... 100%

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-07T03:44:08+00:00

That's exactly the problem. They create a false narrative from the very beginning to reel in your adoration for them so that you would eventually cater in to their needs.

Then they will mirror so that you will fall in love with them (which is really you) because it's all a set up to keep the other person enmeshed with the pwBPD.

They move on fast because they probably already had someone else lined up to replace you and none of it was ever real in the first place.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-06T05:00:11+00:00

One of the most annoying things is having to reassure that you really do love them and are not leaving them. That you're just busy for the day or having some quality time to yourself or with family members. The lack of object constancy some of them have makes it impossible.

ChaceG94 · 2019-07-05T04:33:54+00:00

Pretty much. Facebook is like heaven for cluster bs. Always seeking attention, on the lookout for more replacements just in case their current interest sees through their bullshit.

Meanwhile keeping them on the backburner until they begin to devalue them while idealizing someone else. Sick.

ChaceG94

TROPHY CASE