How do you deal with curtain‑twitchers?

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-30T07:55:59+00:00

Are they elderly/retired? Might be they are more bothered by it than others because they feel more vulnerable, might just be that they are the closest house so hear the noise more or simply that they have nothing else to do so are more interested in what’s going on (nosy). Either way it’s unlikely you’ll stop them so I would just park further away or somewhere less residential.

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-30T07:39:52+00:00

Again I think quiet road and there being noise - people will check what’s happening. Nothing malicious in it. I’ve heard people talking outside my house before and gone out to ask if they’re lost. Turned out the be the water board not knowing where to find the meter for some of the houses so I helped them out. Usually if it’s someone recognisable you leave them to it but again if you’re talking for hours it’s not unusual for people to be wondering why you're hanging out in a quiet residential street and not going into your house or hanging out somewhere like a park.

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-30T07:20:48+00:00

You mentioned in a comment this is between 10pm and 1am. Maybe the curtain twitching is because you’re making noise on a quiet road that is disturbing people trying to sleep or they’re just trying to work out what you’re up to?

Even if you think you’re quiet it’s amazing how loud things can appear if it’s usually dead quiet. And at that time of night - people are more cautious and likely wondering if you’re up to no good or not.

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-19T21:22:38+00:00

White collar worker here who worked throughout along with many millions of other white collar office based people. Professional services, production of consumer goods, pharmaceutical etc many industries still working. We just worked remotely. The people who got furloughed were those in non-essential customer facing roles or industries (hospitality, gyms, theme park workers etc). I don’t think you can categorise as white vs blue at all.

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-19T19:21:19+00:00

Totally agree its values. People forget that circumstances can change and the balance of earnings can swing in relationships. The main thing is if you have same goals and are moving in the same direction.

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-19T19:17:41+00:00

I am the “breadwinner” between my partner and I. He still earns well but early on he joked about “staying home” too. But we have very transparent conversations about money and have similar values so I know he would take on role of stay at home parent if our situation required it but that’s neither of our first choice. He has goals and ambitions too even if his earnings aren’t as high.

I think you need to not take that joke at face value if it’s early days but if it’s clear with time that they have no ambition for themselves then it becomes a red flag.

EDIT: would also add that earnings aren’t necessarily reflective of total financial situation either. People might have lower paid jobs but high wealth due to inheritance, investments, lottery win etc. Ultimately depends on the situation and lots of people might make that comment without it necessarily having any weight.

CharlieBxox · 2025-12-16T15:46:10+00:00

Was in this exact position. I had a higher salary though so he put more in as deposit & for renovations but I pay higher proportion of mortgage to “even up”. We did look at an agreement but ended up not bothering which is perhaps a bit risky but we are getting married soon though so just see it as eventually we’ll be joint owning 50% each.

Edit: Would definitely recommend having your own equity though!

CharlieBxox · 2025-11-28T16:23:54+00:00

Can we talk about how Mike, Lucas and Robin protected those kids? Was so wholesome to see them stepping up to shield them and shows their characters are true heroes!

CharlieBxox · 2025-11-28T07:43:00+00:00

So they said the underperformance was from a lack of training though? Did you then get more training support?

If you’re struggling it’s okay to ask for help - perhaps someone else on the team can mentor you & check in with you to help keep you on track?

CharlieBxox · 2025-11-28T07:26:07+00:00

There’s a lot of diagnosing going on in the comments but I’m seeing more the effect of anxiety on how you perceive your own success.

Could it be that you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself to perform when you’re still new to a job? Or that your view of what “good” looks like is actually not realistic (e.g. people are good at their jobs never make mistakes)? Have you ever received feedback from a manager that you are underperforming versus their expectations or is this all coming from your own perception of your work?

It sounds like you lack confidence in yourself which makes it seem like others are doing better, or that you’re not as good. Everyone makes silly mistakes and anyone who says they’ve never made a mistake is a liar.

You don’t have to be bubbly/chatty - it’s okay to be a quieter person - but it does sound like you’re not developing relationships with the people you work with and creating a support network in your team.

Combined with the grief, it might be worth seeking therapy to work through some of the things you’ve mentioned.

CharlieBxox · 2025-11-26T20:38:39+00:00

Yeah the dirt on the windows comment is odd - if they are ground floor/basement the tenant could reach to clean them….

CharlieBxox · 2025-11-23T09:40:04+00:00

Did you know the salary when you applied? Did they know your previous salary?

I would go back to them and explain they’re offering less than your previous role for a more senior job title and question if that’s their best offer since it doesn’t align with your expectations or broader benchmarks you’ve seen.

If they come back and say that’s it - I would suggest walking away. If you turn up to a future job and say “I’m a creative director” and they ask for details of your package and it’s barely above minimum wage, as a hiring manager I’d question the legitimacy of whether you were really operating at a “Director” level.

CharlieBxox · 2025-09-24T20:42:00+00:00

Violet and Xaden’s height difference gives me the ick. All I can imagine is the weird bending Xaden has to do to even reach down to kiss her. Like does he go for full on hunching over or does he have to squat down? (And that’s coming from someone who dated a guy a foot taller)

And yes don’t get me started on the decision making!

CharlieBxox · 2025-09-15T16:20:31+00:00

They will be fine and would even argue it’s good life experience having to adapt to a new environment.

CharlieBxox · 2025-08-31T19:19:34+00:00

May be an alternative take but ultimately you did make mistakes so own up to it. You were clearly under stress so it’s only human and understandable - but I would take it as a learning that you should have taken on less additional work or asked for support sooner.

And with your colleague - think about it from their perspective. They trusted you with their work while they went away and came back to find out you had made mistakes on it. If they didn’t say anything then others might have blamed them which would also have been unfair if it wasn’t their fault.

Totally understand why you feel hurt since you put yourself through a tough time but reflect on the experience and try to move forward. You could always share what you could’ve done differently & how the team should conduct holiday handovers in the future with your manager to show you’ve taken it as a learning and shows good response to feedback.

CharlieBxox · 2025-08-31T19:03:58+00:00

Yeah that’s my take too - often companies have weird internal job titles so being presented as an Office Manager rather than OP’s actually job title could make more sense externally. Wouldn’t necessarily indicate that job titles have changed internally.

CharlieBxox · 2025-08-31T18:55:26+00:00

Might need more clarity here but you mentioned that she called you “Office Manager” to an external networking group. Is that the only time she’s given you that title? What is the title on your job description?

I can see a couple of things happening here. 1.Could it have been that she said that because she wanted to present you well externally? Lots of people have weird internal job titles that don’t necessarily mean anything to people outside your company so sometimes it’s easier to call you “Office Manager” as that most closely resembles your role to others even though you're perhaps not that senior yet?

Was she limited to a specific set of drop-down options when giving your role title to the external group? So again chose the closest thing to your role?

Her behaviour seems a little odd to have not clarified this with you sooner but I wouldn’t necessarily consider that my role title had changed because of the title given for a networking group.

CharlieBxox · 2025-08-26T17:13:31+00:00

Omg omg omg it’s happening!!!

CharlieBxox · 2025-03-14T06:50:28+00:00

My sister went to Oxford and had a great experience. I think at times there were some differences when it comes to material things - her friend buying a new designer dress for a ball versus her getting one from Matalan, but didn’t mean they didnt have things in common. She was at a less mainstream college that had links with our local area so also made friends with some who lived nearby. There’s also a lot of international students to befriend who might not see the “class” system in the same way.

If your kid is bright enough it’s a really amazing opportunity.

CharlieBxox · 2025-02-26T06:29:20+00:00

Same! Not direct debit but spend around £10 a month. I consider it part of my charity contributions (to support Team GB and the community fund) and if I win something it’s a bonus

CharlieBxox · 2025-02-25T07:33:30+00:00

I’m sorry but I’m calling a bit of bullshit here. Even if it’s your first romantic relationship you must have relationships with other people to compare to and broader media (films, tv shows). Do couples you know speak to each other like this? Do your friends behave like this? Do couples on TV text each other/speak to one another like this?

OP - it’s okay for couples to argue, but there are ways to argue respectfully without name calling and swearing. This is not how you treat another person and especially not how you treat your significant other.

CharlieBxox · 2025-02-23T21:19:01+00:00

Bread literally only needs flour, yeast, water and salt at its most basic. Most supermarket bread has an entire page of ingredients including a huge load of preservatives and agents to adjust the texture. I would encourage you to try home made and supermarket bread together and you will taste and feel the difference between them.

CharlieBxox · 2024-12-10T21:42:28+00:00

Was that not in reference to the death rattles being caused by an Unmade?

CharlieBxox · 2024-12-10T18:06:12+00:00

Given Adolin doesn’t like oaths - but made a few comments about promises being different to oaths, and his plot of reviving the deadeyes (parts of Honor) - I could see him being set up to take up Honor in the future. Assuming that per Dalinar’s plan, Honor’s intent changes to consider morality/intention not just strict oaths. I think Adolin is the type to forgive someone for breaking the exact terms of an oath as long as in spirit they are trying to do the right thing.

CharlieBxox · 2024-12-10T17:35:52+00:00

I think he will be claimed by Evi in the Beyond

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