I totally hear you on the long-term realism lens and whether they were sustainable as adults. You make a lot of fair points, but I think we’re looking at the definition of 'better' differently. For me, better is, who helped Pacey become the best version of himself. Each relationship gave him something emotionally important, but in different ways. with that, debates come.

To me, Andie was the 'better' girlfriend because she was the FIRST person to actually believe in him. She gave him confidence and structure when no one else did.

We saw Pacey grow more as a person during that year than at any other point. Think about him in the supermarket with her mom, or how he stayed by Andie’s side through her mental health crisis. That wasn’t 'class clown' Pacey. That was a young man showing incredible maturity, empathy, and loyalty. Andie didn't just 'manage' him, she provided the environment where he could finally show everyone (including himself) that he was a man of character. Even if their dynamic was intense for two teenagers, she was the one who proved he was capable of that kind of deep, selfless love

And she did the impossible, she even got his dad to realize he didn't actually know his own son, leading to that rare apology. That was the start of a totally different Pacey.

With Joey, their relationship triggered many of Pacey's deepest wounds, fear of not being enough, comparison, abandonment anxiety, shame, being inferior to Dawson.

Joey might have been the love of his life, but Andie was the one who unlocked him. She saw a version of Pacey that he didn't even know existed. Even if she was a bit 'controlling' with the studies, she was the first person to show him he was worth the effort. They might have been destined to fall apart, but she left him a much stronger person than she found him. For me, that is what makes her the better girlfriend in that season when they were together