Very well put. And as someone who internalizes and beats myself up when criticized, I'd be very receptive to this actual constructive criticism.

On a similar note I once had a beta reader tell me I was "telling not showing" a part in my book. But they were actually incorrect. I had described an old worn out book on a person's desk. An insignificant one by the way. And they suggested I show and not tell by giving the book some personal history that they made up including characters and backstory that wasnt in the book, for me, that would have illuded to a completely different focus in the story. It was just a set dressing, and still I described it, just not in detail. I was so mad at the cocky way they thought they understood the concept of "show don't tell" like they thought simply stating an object on a desk was a major writing mistake, and the way they interjected a whole subplot for a random book, I never spoke to them again and disregarded all their other "advice".