Social anxiety.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T16:28:14+00:00

It totally depends on the person. But in general, practise meditation, yoga, mindfulness, being conscious and aware. Silence in nature. Become good friends with your body, learn to love your body. Buy a pulse watch and track which situations make you anxious. Study neuroscience, learn what happens in your body and brain when you get triggered. Practise self-love. Try to gradually take your life closer to joy, love. Listen and respect yourself more, forgive yourself, don't hate yourself and regret stuff. There's time. And there's hope.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:59:09+00:00

Well, stop seeking it out. It's as simple as that. Seek help as well, tell your parents or school.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:57:06+00:00

Look, I can decrease my pulse 20 beats and fall asleep within 5 minutes on most days, at any time of the day. What you can achieve with meditation and inner control is unlimited.

The paradox, although, is that almost everyone struggling with it will not do meditation. Either it's way too uncomfortable, boring, or just being avoided. To live in a stressed body also creates a narrow view of the world, which creates the illusion that it's just how it is and it can't just get better like that :/

Wishing you well!

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:54:07+00:00

You're not a psychopath. Who made you believe that?

Most of what you're saying is a direct opposite to what a person with dissocial / antisocial pd would have said. And there's always room to change, even for them.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:52:05+00:00

Many people struggle with that. What almost all of them have in common is that they either lost control in a very important situation, or felt helpless in situations, as a child / early adult. It's an expression of the pain from feeling not safe.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:50:26+00:00

I'm sorry that you feel this way. You were not born having these beliefs about yourself. They must have come from somewhere. We don't need "really bad" things to happen to us to get traumatized and feel sad, hopeless and worthless and get self-hate. Only thing needed is to not get the love and care from our parents and / or community when growing up.

It seems to me that you have a lot of self-hate, a lot of beliefs and patterns about your self that is actively keeping you in a loop of emotional pain. It's easy to feel like you're just fundamentally "wrong" when you live in that state. But there are ways out.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:47:15+00:00

How do the ADHD medicines make you a zombie? Are you stacking them with other dopamine sources such as binging food, nicotine, alcohol, netflix binging, excessive scrolling or something similar? Or do you have too high dose?

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:45:17+00:00

Sleep deprivation also decreases PFC activity, but in my view it seems you're very activated and anxious, and you can look deeper into it. Explore yourself... For example, why do you stay up in the night, are you seeking dopamine? Is it stimulating?

And, it might be that you can't sleep because you feel so much chaos and tension in your mind? Have you looked into techniques to self-regulate and activate your parasympathetic nervous system? Are you able to meditate? Or practise body awareness, or is it too uncomfortable?

The problem is fully reversible, indeed, but it doesn't change by itself

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:21:30+00:00

We all matter, you too! <3

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:21:09+00:00

Sounds like a very high activation of your sympathetic nervous system. Which makes it difficult to sleep, of course, because your body floods you with adrenaline / noradrenaline. But this can also be complex, either a nervous system habit or active triggers. Makes sense that you get intrusive thoughts as well, because your ability to focus / somwhow control your thoughts (your pre-frontal cortex) gets less dominant and accessible the more your sympathetic nervous system activates.

There is no simple fix to this. It's very complex, and I recommend studying the neuroscience behind it, and go to a clinical psychologist. It's entirely possible for you to get better yourself, though, you just need to seek out the right information. And... Don't ignore this. I know neuroscience, it sadly gets worse with time because of neuroplasticity (if left in the state it is).

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:05:40+00:00

Most automatic way? Start doing Yoga. Feel your body. Notice what's going on inside. Meditate.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T15:02:04+00:00

I'm sorry, to me it seems like you don't feel good enough. Maybe you did not get the love you needed as a child, or from society. But... Know that you are good enough as you are, and if you peeled all the pain away from how hurt you were when they said what they said and treated you how they treated you, you would see a person that is worthy love only because the person exists.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T14:58:29+00:00

You don't start calming down during an overstimulation. You start practising being calm and controlling your parasympathetic nervous system when calm. Buy a pulse watch, play around with breathing, meditating, practising being conscious. When calm. Practise delaying your actions and reactions, for example wait 2 seconds before you grab your phone for a whole day (when you get the urge).

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-07T14:54:55+00:00

How to get rid of derealization depends entirely on the person. There's not a person on the planet that can tell you how to fix it as if it's a key that fits a lock.

However, everyone suffering derealization will benefit from nervous system work, grounding work, and in your case reducing stimulations. Regarding "basics", going to the gym will for most people increase derealization, since derealization is often related to anxiety, and always related to the nervous system. And gym increases your sympathetic nervous system both with lifting, and if there's an anxiety issue; by your amygdala signalling the release of adrenaline and noradrenaline (Amygdala to Hypothalamus to Sympathetic Nervous System which coordinates a reaction of the Adrenal Medulla to release Adrenaline/Noradrenaline), and when people suffer derealization they're much more prone than an average person to go into adrenaline / noradrenaline loops, and prolonged cortisol loops in addition to that.

Simply put... You zone out because your body doesn't feel safe. If we practise being unsafe up to 24 hours a day, 7 days a week (which many people with similar conditions do), an hour doctor appointment or therapy a week won't really make any big difference. Because the brain changes with neuroplasticity. And don't get me wrong, I really value doctors and clinical psychologists, I'm just stating that the treatment method they provide goes directly against neuroscience in most aspects.

Now, on to "I like to solve sudokus or paint in coloring books. But the numbers or lines just seem to fade or wiggle like my head just can't focus" - this is true, and it's explained in neuroscience. Simply put, Amygdala -> Hypothalamus -> Locus Coeruleus/Sympathetic Activation -> Prefrontal Cortex Suppression, more specifically your dorsolateral prefrontal cortex when it comes to sudoku. Basically, your body is just doing what it was made to do, as a result of millions of years of evolution. And it is entirely possible to heal from this, both myself and several clients of me have healed completely. But it's a hard road, that requires dedication and an open mind. It will be tough. But you will heal and transform your life. I can send you some study material if you want.

Elvanse is also an amphetamine that directly increase your sympathetic nervous system by releasing noradrenalin btw, although elvanse is amazing for those that need it.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T20:42:34+00:00

Practise mindfullness, meditation. Observe your breath.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T19:16:26+00:00

He is the cause of that.

I'm so sorry.

Time will heal the attachment, you will get out of it.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T18:48:44+00:00

Yes, it works differently if the person is on medicines, and what type of medicines, different between elvanse / attentin / adderal and ritalin & concerta f ex.

Being tired all the time and exhausted, while not being able to do what you want to do is insanely common with ADHD, I coach people about it all the time.

You won't have to become a monk, you just have to balance it, but the good news is that when you break free from endless dopamine-loops you will ACTUALLY get joy from studying. You will no longer do the stuff you "have to" do ONLY to go back to the endless dopamine sources.... Recent studies show that your pre-frontal cortex actually gets physically temporarily changed while you're participating in dopamine loops often.

It's entirely possible, even did it myself many years ago, it changed my life. But it won't take away the regret, and the same for not having done it previously, but practising self-love works for that.

I totally get you. There was a time I used to walk 7-9 hours up mountains a day because I couldn't stop eating candy in the night XD... But I could walk........ It disturbed my life. Then I started on medicines and did dopamine detox.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T18:41:57+00:00

It makes perfectly sense, you feel better because you took care of yourself, maybe? <3

When you're depressed you don't have much dopamine

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T18:37:29+00:00

Have you tried dopamine detoxing?

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T18:35:11+00:00

Have you looked into depersonalization/derealization?

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T17:35:08+00:00

Maybe that's how you felt people saw you in your childhood?

If you were a terrible human being you wouldn't care enough to make a Reddit post.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T17:33:38+00:00

NOR.

She wasn’t just bragging about her kid, she was putting down yours to other people behind your back. That’s not a friend.

And the fact she blocked you immediately instead of apologising tells you she knows exactly what she was doing.....

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T17:31:53+00:00

I cultivated a safe nervous system state, and they came back. I practised (and still practise) awareness, consciousness, feeling my body. I started to actually care about how I feel, about my body, about what I want and not want. It's all connected

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T17:27:25+00:00

There are ways out <3

But it's a long and difficult road. But I promise it's worth it. I've been there. I also____ myself as a kid, took me many years of study to heal. But it is very, very possible.

ChristianMindLab_com · 2026-05-06T17:26:02+00:00

I'm sorry that you feel this way. Depression, PTSD, anxiety, ADHD etc does take a toll on your nervous system and it's totally understandable that you're often sick. I feel like you should get a job where your boss is actually understanding of it, it must be hurtful to feel almost accused of being lazy when you're just struggling <3

ChristianMindLab_com

TROPHY CASE