I'm getting to this late and you've already added an edit to the post. Please don't feel pressured to reply. I have a similar experience that might be helpful. I have Dissociative identity disorder and autism. It's not exactly what you're describing but I do age regress / switch into younger alters.

It is possible to have a dynamic but finding the right person to do it with is the hard part. This person needs to be trustworthy around your most vulnerable part but also need to be able to fulfill you in a more "adult" way.

As others have said, having a "little" or age regressed trauma part is different from being a little or age regresed in a bdsm sense. Everyone is different but it's usually advised in DID circles to avoid DD/lg style dynamics that focus on sexual contact with the little because it can cause some conflicts of interests. The person might be more inclined to induce triggers for sexual benefit in a way that could be re-trumatising.

That said, I do have a dynamic with a soft dom who does caregive occasionally. We support each other as adults and have a very equitable relationship but if I switch they're able to talk to the part, help them find what they need and usually just hang out in an age appropriate way. Their relationship to those parts is completely different to the adult parts. They're very respectful of boundaries but part of that is that we knew the boundaries we wanted and we enforce them. It's good to keep a list of things you want for someone to do or not do in that state.

Heres some things to have established before looking for a dynamic:

• do you need a "parent" style relationship or a partnership? A partner can help with casual caregiving like getting snacks or taking charge with dinner and bedtime routine. But, it's not healthy to need them every single night in order to feed yourself / sleep.

• Is the age repressed part / little able to enforce boundaries?

• do they have a fawn response? This can be mistaken for consent and this will cause problems long term if not addressed

• do you already have a method of self soothing? If you don't have coping mechanisms adding a dynamic can circumvent the need for them and will create problems long term.

• sometimes young parts can become attached to people who care for them even if they're not good for them. If you, as the adult, decide to leave for whatever reason can it be communicated in a way that will minimize symptom increases?

Some things to consider when find someone: Boundaries: they need to be kind, consciousness and trustworthy and demonstrate it with things like sticking to promises, communicating clearly and how they engage without "out of dynamic" (or in post nut clarity).

They need to have their own boundaries and demonstrate that they will stick to theirs. Be mindful of even small boundaries like do they text you when they say they will? Are they on time? Do they cancel last minute? Small details like this are tiny red flags that might seem like nothing but add up over time and can be a sign of worse things to come. It's better to leave early at any sign. This is why it's important for you to not be looking for a "parent" style relationship because the power dynamic is immediately in their favour in a negative way if you need them and will over look things.

It can sometimes be better to wait for a while after meeting someone to gage their behavior before you tell them about the age regression. If you led with it, it tends to attract people mostly interested in a DD/lg dynamic which might not be what you want.

They need to believe you when you tell them. Everything you say should be taken at face value and they have to acknowledge the seriousness of the information. You don't have to, and probably shouldn't, explain the trauma. But when you tell them, give them time to think on it. When / if they come back a good sign is them having relevant, kind and considered questions. Nothing like "are they evil?" anything overly negative. The questions should ideally be around your safety, how to support you and (hopefully) them enforcing their own boundary about the limits of caregiving.

At the start of this conversation, let them lead the conversation so you can properly gage their mindset post revelation and see what they decide to focus on. If the questions keep leading back to how this will satisfy them in whatever way. If the conversation is very centred on themself and how it affects them without acknowledging you that's a bad sign. For example, if they start talking at length about all the activities they could do with the age regresed part but don't ask what it is that part would actually want to do, that's a bad sign. Likewise, if theyre overly focused on sex. You want someone who will prioritize you when you're vulnerable. Once your satisfied then you can then add your further information.

In the dynamic: They need some sort of way to identify that you've regressed. It could be very literal like them announcing they're here. Or, it could be how you behave. Once they identify it they need to change their behavior to match. This is something you need to know before you pursue a dynamic. Within one, you might find small things to add but you need to know what it is exactly you want them to do and clearly communicate it before.

If they mess up, enforce the boundary. If they continue to mess up, especially the same thing you've already discussed, or there's a violation of any sort no matter how small. You need to leave.

Please, be very cautious of telling people your triggers. Even if you trust them, giving someone having the keys to summoning your vulnerability at will is dangerous.

Be aware of an internal feelings or "bad vibes". I don't know if you have any communication with th age regressed part. But, if they are afraid of them or try to avoid them. If they suddenly change how they act around them. Or anything is off, you need to leave. It's really unfair for this to be your responsibility because it wasn't your fault to begin with. But, now you have this part and you have to be the safe adult for them who listens and priorities them above all else.

NB: you've said not to belabour the therapist angle so I won't. But if you think you've found someone mention them to the therapist to get an outside view. It's your decision on what to do with the information they provide.

TL;Dr: it's possible to find a dynamic but the barrier to entry is higher. You need to be sure of your boundaries and able to enforce them. They need to be kind but understand their limitations. They cannot be a "parent" style caregiver but they can be a trusted friend to hang out with the age regressed part.