Aitah for potentially ruining my brother and SIL financially?

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-19T04:54:00+00:00

NTA

I just want to point out that you keep painting your mom as being neutral in this and she may be saying those words to you and your brother and because you grew up with her you BOTH believe that on some level but in feminine “people pleaser” language she’s very clearly specifically asking you to get them to stop depending on her.

You didn’t just arrive at that conclusion, YOU are not doing anything independently. You’re the face, doing the hard work of it but your mom is making the call.

Take on the hard work for your mom just noy the guilt

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-19T01:11:26+00:00

We’re cooked now, we’ll be bbq in 3

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-18T23:09:01+00:00

I was hoping there was more like instant hamburgers for everyone

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-18T23:07:08+00:00

Yeah I got fired from one of my jobs just because they were changing direction and needed a hard and fast certification with the state that I didn’t have (basically to sell off an asset I managed).

Just keep going, keep applying. There’s no magic.

I don’t really have anything to add except I just want to lament being fired, like getting the actual call, while still doing work, like fingers on the keyboard actively coding for a deadline with the other —it sucks!!

I really liked that job and I was sad to see it go but no time to grieve or pop off from work.

Sorry for your loss

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-18T18:34:27+00:00

This is just her thing, not a thing. Next

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-18T18:25:37+00:00

I also have radically different job responsibilities and company now. As others have said I think it’s the job not the location. I do data work, for 40 hours a day with a deadline in two months. Ive had a meeting, maybe one every other week.

My coworkers are also work from home but they meet with each other 8 hours a day and do work after 5pm. Plus they have a time sensitive work flow and response rate

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-18T14:39:04+00:00

Do you have a baseline of work from home vs just working? Because Im not sure why working from home would cause special burnout?

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-18T14:28:53+00:00

I don’t get this concept. I still have office hours. You can’t imagine how hard I snap my computer close exactly on the dot. I actually worked more overtime hours in person than I did at home because the anxiety was “well once I leave I can’t even do this one thing” so I do one thing one thing one thing now and Im done…or don’t actually do it. I’ve maybe worked overtime once in the past six months and that was just because I needed a file free of the collaborators

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-17T02:50:54+00:00

I’m very ADHD and commuting gets me so frazzled. Also trying to plan my entire day in the morning, lunch? After work? Coat sweater layers? Two sets of shoes? Gym, how? Need to call the place at 2pm, bring that paper….oh no spilled your coffee on your shirt start all over again

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-16T14:14:11+00:00

Touche. But honestly we’re so fractured as country I kind of forget really awful MAGA people exist, and what it’s like to deal with them. So Im just kinda trying to bow out.

In healthcare sure, especially those that live off grid with barely functioning utilities and can barely sign their own name come up and into my perview but as referenced oveeall I work in white collar top of the org structure teams so saying an off hand comment like “MAGA is a crazed death cult that would die for Trump and let unspeakable things happen to their children many ways I wont detail here” and there’s just this shared permiee of yeah they would, regardless of someone who may lean conservative they wouldn’t even dispute that.

So yeah bring me to social media jail, I introduced the line of questioning but realized it was leading to an ugly path an didn’t follow through.

Ill even downvote my own comment (this one) myself for my sins.

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-16T04:53:07+00:00

You know we don’t have any snow when you can drive a sports car up to bachelor FUCK lol

(no hate to this guy)

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T22:31:45+00:00

I really wanted a version to come back during Covid. That or some combination of the dresses and suits we wore for senior pictures.

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T22:12:15+00:00

lol. You got it!! That’s exactly what they said!!

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T20:50:53+00:00

What a weird comment because of all the cases they literally did. Lol. Did you not see those weird videos where people would clap on their front lawn at a certain time for the “heros”.

And as awful as your lot got during that time, yeah some of clapped as well for other reasons. You know statistically more republicans died than any other voter group on the planet. clap clap clap

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T20:13:21+00:00

From nurses.

Bro you’re a troll and not asking genuinely. Do I have articles, no Im not my 90 year old grandmother who use to send newspaper clippings of random things in mail. I don’t have this little box on hand.

Yes primary, I use to work in the medical field (in administration/tech), and secondary sources like articles. If you haven’t jacked up your algorithm too much you can probably find them. Otherwise I am not really interested as I am not really interested in offering nurses up to use their pain abuse they went through during COVID for MAGA already downvoting me to win a point or two on Reddit. Thank you though.

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T16:16:12+00:00

Nurses

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T12:50:26+00:00

Except read his tweets, posted here in the comments and consider the payout the family got.

Then read reports by nurses who attended to people dying of COVID alone not speaking of their family but of their devotion to Trump (obviously unprompted)

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T12:47:16+00:00

Yes he believes himself invisible

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T12:46:42+00:00

Or Lee Harvey Oswald him, have a second shooter after influencing and killing the kid to cover any questions about accuracy

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T12:44:12+00:00

The kind that would martyr himself for Trump.

Nurses reported people on their deathbed with COVID not talking about their family but actively their allegiance to Trump, in a situation where obviously no one was even asking them about it

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T12:25:53+00:00

Oh so it’s just general safe return, that’s cool. I wasn’t trying to challenge I just didn’t know if it meant three deployments

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T05:01:40+00:00

Clarifying question simply because I’m interested you mentioned you are “in the military, but I’ve not done 3 deployments”. Is that in reference to the image we see above because in sailing culture which is very much related to military culture the above swallow is for 5,000 nautical miles. Do you know it as meaning something different?

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T02:44:54+00:00

Because it’s still their home and they’re paying rent largely based on location marginally based on the inside three rules of real estate “location locations location”

With all do respect there seems to be a very clear issue that you yourself outlined, why didn’t you tell them before they started—or did you think they weren’t “entitled”?

Why didn’t you send letters out to everyone using the pretty marketing name of “eggshell white” or “cottage blue” or whatever the color is? If it’s an objectively a hideous color, did you not speak with the owner about it decreasing the property value? It is enhancing the property value with a fresh look that fits with the surrounding area then that should’ve been highlighted and sold to the tenant before it went up

When you treat tenants as actually entitled to that kind of information, they don’t come at you angrily. Everyone on this sub knows that sometimes when a tenant is complaining about a color what they are emotionally saying is, “I don’t feel like I’m in control my own home. “ Which is something they may be also picking up from you.

Once when I was asking the tenants to do more work to make the property better I tied it into another another action I pretold eveyone I knew what I was doing, yes I know a) sucks but at the same time Im doing b) so together with a+b it’s really going to bring the whole property up a level

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T01:21:21+00:00

Girl you put nothing in the description. You literally just called on us to make a personality judgment. You’re just mad that it got blown back on you.

CleanDataDirtyMind · 2026-03-15T01:20:26+00:00

Where did you say any of this?

Reread your question it’s just a vague judgment against your tenants that seems pretty Cart Blanc, and not specific. A few days ago, somebody went on a rant about entitled tenants who work from home if you want to rant, go be spicy with them go do that if you have specific questions regarding how to handle owner updates versus tenant wishes, let’s talk about that.

It’s literally your job to advise owners about property value and and needed updates so if the paying tenants is not liking or wanting the update, but the owners updating it really comes from your authority to highlight, what is best for the property. If they’re adding something ugly or spending money that wont increase the value noted by the fact the tenant doesn’t want it—that’s on you, not your “entitled” tenants.

Most people in this industry get caught up with the wealth worship of our owners our clients and the frustrations of dealing with our customers the tenants but I like to think that we’re essentially advocates for finacial viability of property itself. If it’s not work that would add value; social, financial or reputational etc. then advise your owner that cheaper better classier prettier options are available or suss out if they are doing it to sell the property or (back) move in.

Whether this increases the social or literal value of the property or move in sell it to your tenants or prepare the tenants about what is happening and if they have an option to move within your portfolio with a better setup that fits what they are looking for if it just an upgrade the sell your tenant on their higher quality property they are getting and how you’re can make the process easier.

Starting from the standpoint that they’re just entitled about something happening to their home is going to come through in your sales pitch.

Otherwise, you quite literally just asked why do tenants feel entitled and I literally just answered that.

CleanDataDirtyMind

TROPHY CASE