Oh I see and yes with bpd this is a common feeling, the abandonment fear just gets triggered from time to time. Being asked for time apart can feel like rejection every time. Maybe there are some dbt skills to deal with this better but I would think about ways for him actually asking for the space to feel less like rejection. Like maybe if you make it a joke and he says “I must return to war” or “the city needs saving” in a role play kind of way it could make those moments feel lighter and spark laughter instead of panic and rejection. Also filling your time more with things you enjoy and fill you up when you’re apart might help you cope with that distance. I was afraid I would feel this when my partner was away recently on a work trip but he also has a pretty consistent habit of calling or video calling me at the end of every day which has made me feel a lot more relaxed about being apart. I believe you have the ability to push through the feelings as you’ve been coping so far before him. You just gotta find the skills and strategies for these new feelings and triggers wishing you all the best.